The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I wrote a couple days ago that my AH relapsed in a post title "Same Old Story". But I realized just now, it is not the same old story. Instead of freaking out, I used my program skills, prayed to my HP and survived the last two days without much stress, relatively speaking of course. This is his second relapse in 6 weeks. 3 weeks without drinking seems to be all he can handle. The first time, I went crazy, called the police because he threatened suicide, he was in the ER for three days, lots and lots of drama.
This time he left a note, stayed out all night, I didn't call him, no texts, silence, didn't call his family, friends, nothing. Turns out he got himself to his outpatient treatment the next day, tried to get back to inpatient, but they had no beds, so he came home in the afternoon.
When I tried to talk to him about it he told me, "this is not all about you, you know". LOL, that was my HP telling me to mind my own business. So I said, "you are right, it is not all about me", and then shut up about it. He doesn't plan to leave the house this weekend. Fine for him. We spent Christmas alone last year because of his disease, but this holiday, I will leave him to his feelings and with his HP. Today I am going to a face to face meeting, then taking care of some errands. Tomorrow I will visit with my family and enjoy this blessed weekend.
My partner has been sober 8 months this time, he has had to other stints of sobriety for 9 months and 6 but he keeps trying.
Sounds like your husband wants change but keeps slipping back I just get out of the way my my A slips he carnt blame me and when it gets bad enough he gets help.
This disease is horrible I will pray for you both,
keep up with your own al anon medicine hugs tracy xxxxx
what a great response on your part this programme is great when you work it
I have had a major wobble cos my partner drank again this week after 5 weeks sober (this has now been going on/off since last May - he's done up to about 7 weeks sober) I have been to three face to face meetings this week and that has really helped
one meeting was about spiritual awakening and someone read from the CAL and I hear a section about 'ask and accept' help from the HP. I am ruminating on this - I find it hard to ask my HP for help as I don't believe in a deity and therefore I wonder who/what I am asking.
however, I have had the good fortune to have my adult daughter around this weekend and I can see how far I have come in the programme in the much improved relationship we have. I am basking in her growth as a young adult and loving hearing about her plans for life and her thoughts (maybe my HP has come through in those conversations?)
Paris: hope you've had a good weekend with your family this weekend x
Thanks everyone for your replies and encouragement. I had some slips after feeling so positive on Sat. Morning, but in the end had a mostly peacefull weekend. I see that I am changing, and realize it is slow going (progress not perfection, right?). TODAY is a good day, and that is enough.
Hugs Paris, good for you working your program It makes a difference!!!
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
