Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

Tired-of-it · Veteran Member

RE: THE Gifts/PROMISES OF ALANON

Hope4Healing · Member

I am new here and hadn't yet heard these promises. They pose a wonderful way to live for anyone anywhere. A hopeful set of goals to work toward too. Thank you for posting. I think it will be good to read and reread these.

RubiRivera · Newbie

Thank you on this.. My first question earlier and you answered it all. Thank you! wink

Shawnie · Member

I am new and have so much fear. I hope this worked for your healing.

hope for the hopeless · Member

Thank you Tigger. This is Hope, new member. Love the promises. They will materialize if we work for them and have faith, I am sure.

ElizabethM · Newbie

I've been in recovery in AlAnon for over a year (YAY!). the list you shared intrigued me. I've noticed that when I'm working my program, I do feel on some days that my life flows with ease and balance from God. I also notice a deeper gratitude. I do laugh more! I hardly ever laughed, but today I found at the end of the day, when I'm lying in bed to catch my second wind so I can put the kids to bed, I start laughing with my 2 year old climbing all over me. I had a good 2 minute belly laugh as we wrestled. That never used to happen. Even though I have sad days sometimes, I have some gifts that are new since coming to Al Anon.

hope for the hopeless · Member

Thank you, Tigger. I love the promises. Here is what AA's promises look like:

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Selfseeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change. Fear of people and economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us - sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.

I like the fact that fear will be replaced by faith. It is happening in my life as we speak.

barbe · Newbie

CONFUSED: Understood that there are the AA PROMISES and THE GIFTS OF AL-ANON. Somehow around my district the title GIFTS OF AL-ANON has been dropped and members are calling them the Al-Anon Promises?

Has anyone checked?

Barb E

Wednesday Serenity

Qualicum Beach, British Columbia

Canada

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

No The posting are the alanon promises/ gifts and has both words in the title. I believe it is a small difference.

To me the word "Gifts" means I do not have to do anything to obtain them. Promises, to me means i need to do the work. Alanon works when i work it

Littlewing65 · Newbie

I have found my way here and am reading my way through the posts....I needed this one today. Thank you!

Iamhere · ~*Service Worker*~

Welcome to MIP Littlewing65 - glad you found us and glad that you joined right in!!

DellaElle · Member

I am new here, and this post showed up as an unread Sticky, so I clicked on it. I'm so glad this is up at the top. I've never heard the Gifts of Al-Anon, and reading them made my heart feel lighter. It made me feel better about this program - kind of warm-blanket-wrapped-around-me feeling. Thank you Tigger.

Aline · ~*Service Worker*~

I know what you mean, DellaElle! I used to reread the promises quite often for several months when I first came to Alanon as they are so hopeful! I marvel that I can see them begin to be fulfilled in my life, they seemed as far as the Moon just 8 months ago. So grateful for this program :)

Anew · Newbie

Thank you for posting this!

I appreciate it very much.

Iamhere · ~*Service Worker*~

Welcome to MIP Anew - glad you found us and joined right in! Browse around and post away!

kygirl2200 · Newbie

Wonderful to read this! Beautiful reminder; thanks for posting :)

Iamhere · ~*Service Worker*~

Welcome to MIP kygirl2200 - glad you found us and glad you joined right in!!

Tude · Senior Member

Thank you for posting! Good reminder of what the program can do :)

Wolfie55 · Senior Member

This is the first time in a long time since I have seen the Promises of Alanon. It is explained at the outset of this post that we need to have done and/or be doing certain things before these promises begin to come true for us. So, if you've only been here a short time and you don't see them manifesting, just wait a bit longer. Thanks for taking time to make this post.

wp · ~*Service Worker*~

Thank you Tigger ; it was good of you to post the promises for us.
Thank you Eve for the pdf

wp

ling · Veteran Member

Thank you tigger

SoggySlippers · Veteran Member

Tigger wrote:
The Al-Anon Gifts/ Promises - From Survival to Recovery (p269)

If we willingly surrender ourselves to the spiritual discipline of The Twelve Steps and work the program, our lives will be transformed. Members work their program by being willing to attend meetings on a regular basis, reading Al-Anon/Alateen literature, getting a sponsor, working toward applying the 12 Steps of recovery to their lives and by becoming involved in Al-Anon Service work as they begin to recover.

1. We will become mature, responsible individuals with a great capacity for joy, fulfillment, and wonder. Though we may never be perfect, continued spiritual progress will reveal to us our enormous potential.
2. We will discover that we are both, worthy of love and loving. We will love others without losing ourselves, and will learn to accept love in return.
3. Our sight, once clouded and confused, will clear and we will be able to perceive reality and recognize truth
4. Courage and fellowship will replace fear. We will be able to risk failure to develop new hidden talents.
5. Our lives, no matter how battered and degraded, will yield hope to share with others.
6. We will begin to feel and will come to know the vastness of our emotions, but will not be slaves to them.
7. Our secrets will no longer bind us in shame.
8. As we gain the ability to forgive our families, the world, and ourselves our choices will expand.
9. With dignity we will stand for ourselves, but not against our fellows.
10. Serenity and peace will have meaning for us, as we allow our lives and the lives of those we love to flow day by day with G-ds ease, balance, and grace.
11. No longer terrified, we will discover we are free to delight in lifes paradox, mystery, and awe.
12. We will laugh more.
13. Fear will be replaced by faith, and gratitude will come naturally as we realize that our Higher Power is doing for us what we cannot do for ourselves.

Can we really grow to such proportions? Only if we accept life as a continuing process of maturation and evolution toward wholeness. Then we suddenly begin to notice these gifts appearing. We see them in those who walk beside us. Sometimes slowly or haltingly, occasionally in great bursts of brilliance, those who work The Steps change and grow toward light, toward health, and toward their Higher Power. Watching others, we realize this is also possible for us.
Will we ever arrive? Feel joyful all the time? Have no cruelty, tragedy, or injustice to face? Probably not, but we will acquire growing acceptance of our human fallibility, as well as greater love and tolerance for each other. Self-pity, resentment, martyrdom, rage, and depression will fade into memory. Community rather than loneliness will define our lives. We will know that we belong, we are welcome, we have something to contribute, and that is enough.

I SO want all of these things more than I ever have.

nursepattyb · Newbie

Thank you for reminding me that I don't have to live in fear, waiting for the other shoe to drop or finding my son unconscious in his room. My life has been nothing but fear and I know that fear is not from God but it is all that I have known

Iamhere · ~*Service Worker*~

Welcome to MIP nursepattyb - so glad you found us and so glad you joined in and shared. Please keep coming back - there is hope and help in recovery!

Aloha · ~*Service Worker*~

Hello everyone - I just received the WSO's "In The Loop" e-newsletter today and they have an interesting blog post regarding the "Gifts/Promises".

It's worth a read.

In essence, the titling of this list with "gifts" or "promises" is not backed by the WSO.

I still think it's a great list, however. And I don't think I see the "promises/gifts" going away anytime soon. But thought I'd share the details on this mis-titled (for lack of better words) share.

https://al-anon.org/blog/does-al-anon-have-promises/

PS - if you want a subscription to the "In The Loop" WSO e-newsletter you can sign up here.

PPS - feel free to move this post elsewhere. This probably might belong on the business board? Not sure. Don't know if anything needs to be done about the thread or not. We're not an official Al-Anon meeting as it is.

-- Edited by Aloha on Wednesday 13th of November 2019 02:41:40 PM

DavidG · ~*Service Worker*~

smile Aroha mai, Aloha...

ACA has a set of promises. But Alanon has promises, of various sorts, I feel, but no official list.

We can 'keep it simple' and talk through what is allowed, and what is not. I responded to the article and made a posting.

Alanon Concept 4: "Participation is the key to harmony."

aww ... aww ... aww ...

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene