The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I don't know what's been happening but from just before Christmas until now my son has not drank. Didn't have him for Christmas but he did come over for New Years and we had a great time cooking ( he loves to cook) and watching movies. It's so nice when he is not drinking.
He seems to have his head together because he's been working with his counselor, going to the doctors and looking hard for a job. He has a interview tomorrow so I'm in heaven right now.. :)
Even with my mistake of helping him look for the jobs, he was OK with it. I wasn't though....have a hard time staying out of his business.
His little apartment is clean and neat. He has lost 60lbs over this last couple of months and he just looks great.
Tonight we are going out to dinner again and then we are going to a AA meeting to meet his sponsor. I told him I would go the Al-anon meeting next door but he said it was OK for me to go to his meeting if I wanted. Not sure if it's the right thing to do...or if I'm interferring.
I pray that this year both of us continue down the right paths to serenity and peace thru God, AA, Al-anon and MIP.
It works, if you work it and your worth it........
Cathy
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
Things sound really positive, take the good when it is here! Given the struggles you find yourself in with regards to your son, I would probably opt to do the Al Anon meeting vs. going to his meeting. While I've attended AA meetings with my exBF a couple of times, I was not comfortable and he never got involved when I was there. Did not speak, did not go talk to people so I know it affected him and I opted to not keep going.
Cathy, Id say go to the AA meeting and meet his sponsor, I don't think this is interfering. But what I want you to remember is to take it ONE DAY AT A TIME and have your Alanon tools ready in case he falls off his program, so it won't be so crushing to you and you can still stay "in heaven" on your program and you don't blame yourself.
I think your son has gathered some love and perspective from his visit with "Dad".
In support, Oldergal
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Don't Worry About Growing Old, It Is A Privilege For Some Of Us.....
Thank you so for the support. I will take it one day at a time because I have been disappointed so many times I can't count them anymore. I always beat myself up because I'm a dreamer and think he will be different and god knows he's not.
I love him and will take the good while it's here but have the prayers and tools to keep me safe.
((((hugs ))))
__________________
Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
Thank for sharing this Cathy. I always like to hear signs of hope, and yes there is always hope. Hang on to your hat! Serenity prayer to you and yours. wp
I believe that one of the very best description of the enablers love is "we love them to death". That description made me very sick...mind, body, spirit and emotions because I was addictively focused on my alcoholic/addict wife. I wanted the best for her and stood in the way of her getting the best. I was the one who sent her back out for another long run on drugs and alcohol. She was in AA and clean and sober and it was I who told her I didn't think she was alcoholic even when I knew damned well that she was the poster woman for the discription. I was saying not what I knew but what I didn't want to be true and God needed to get me out of the way. The second and third steps are so very very important for the alcoholic/addict and for the Al-Anon partner because without a power greater than the compulsion for the chemical and the compulsion for the addicted we keep using. I'd suggest go to the Al-Anon meeting and find a sponsor of your own. Just a suggestion. (((((hugs)))))
Hello Cathy, Happy New Year!