The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I just threw him out, again....Well, out of the house I now rent while he lives in our home.
I kept my boundary and when he showed up stinking drunk---I made him leave....I feel awful, ....he cried.
I know he sits home everyday...has food delivered and only goes out if he has to.
I am trying to date again, and feeling like a traitor for trying to build a new life. We have been
through hell together and survived it. But now I can't stand to see, hear or God Forbid smell him. If I made him sell our house and give me
1/2 the money he would be another homeless drunk. How am I supposed to live with that? He is a sad, loving, gentle man who has
this awful disease and it's killing him...Like all of us on these boards--I feel like I've been cheated by life. BTW, I usually manage to avoid this much self pity.
Thank you ...I've missed my last few f2f meetings...Gosh can you tell?..
I don't see this as self pity for one. Self pity doesn't mean never feel the pain of a real situation .. sounds more like you are just feeling the natural effects of hurtful behaviors .. The reality is ~ it Is sad .. it Does hurt .. We do feel ~ it's normal ..
I'm rushed with time on my end with a daughter needing help with school work .. maybe will check back .. In the meantime, someone will come along and share i'm sure ..
Hang in there. Remember one day at a time. Also, make sure to do one thing a day just for yourself for pure fun and enjoyment! Heck, I think everyone could benefit from a 15 minute "vacation" from the stressors of life each day. We DEFINITELY need it. The beauty part of it is date if YOU want to. And maybe it isn't so much about going on a date as opposed to having some mature, adult conversation and interaction without "the elephant" of alcoholism tagging along. I know it's easier said then done but do for YOU, and let him deal with him. You don't have to make any decisions about the house and other matters today. Worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes. Keep your head up and keep coming back.
