The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I went to my boyfriends family Thanksgiving event and met a bunch of his people. They were great and sweet and I had a great time. I have been very cautious, leery and untrusting the last 5 months. I have blown things out of proportion and created crisis when it was not needed. I have had to face myself again and redo a few steps. I am realizing for me to be in a relationship, I have to fully extend myself and let down walls and hand God my fears. Unless I want to keep myself from moving forward and in fantasy land still waiting for the exAH to sober up and become my dream man, which is where he wants me, but not at all healthy. I have been so lucky to meet a patient, loving and sweet man and I have had to realize I have wanted this treatment my whole life and when it came, I freaked out a few times now. This man has stood by my side and loved me through my inner battles lately and let me know my own worth. I am not beating myself up, whether this relationship lasts or not I am learning so much about me and I do not feel like I deserve to be mistreated at all. This has been so hard, but beneficial to me seeing how I have held myself back and broken a couple hearts along the way afraid to really be loved. I am feeling in love and am embracing this and finally open to see where this leads without waiting for the other shoe to drop, because so far it hasn't and that would be no way to live any longer. Things will progress naturally now without me trying to control, lead, steer or have the upper hand. He has proven to me at this point that he is more than deserving of my time and attention. I am so thankful for al-anon and sometimes just ashamed at my past of needing someone to blame for my feelings of inadequacy. Please forgive me MIP family for the times I came here and threw my bf under the bus, because he has come out clean after all my scrutiny and hope no one has judged him as unworthy. I am finally able to come out of my shell and feel the warmth of being loved and it is so very nice. I wish you all well. Sending much love and support on your journey's!
-- Edited by Breakingfree on Monday 26th of November 2012 02:00:29 PM
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
I'm so glad for you and that you have found that space where you are happy and content! That is a wonderful place to be. Wishing you much more to your journey about self.
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
