The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My name is Maxine and I would say Im a 'non' alcoholic, I dont crave drink drugs or food, but I certainly have something wrong with me where I need to fill that emtpy hole i have in me, with something, I have drank, i have taken drugs before, but I can put them down, lucky me eh, but i filled my life with violent men, craved the idea i could change them, I always felt out of place, never fitted in, put on a massive act just to feel normal, couldnt manage everyday 'normal' life, my priorities were all over the place and i never knew what was wrong with me, I still dont, but after living with an alcoholic for nearly 5 years, whom is in his 10th year or sobriety, although he stopped going to AA meetings when we first started living together, which turned into him being a 'dry drunk', and mixed with me, not knowing what was going on inside me (i was just as sick as my partner!!!) we parted on bad terms, nasty and horrible about each other, to each other and other people, long story short, we spent 7 months apart, both had 1 relationship each with another person, and he started going to meetings and started his 12 steps again,and made an amends to me, I had already made my mind up that i loved him still and missed him very much, so after a while i told him how i felt, i was already reading my al anon book and was starting to understand him in a whole new light, we are now back together and getting well together, I havnt got to a meeting as yet, I dont drive but am arranging travel to get my butt there, I read my al anon book everyday and i make a point of praying and listening to various 'AA' and 'Al anon' speakers, I would love to speak to anyone new or experienced I am very excited about the steps and would love to hear advice, stories or just hello's :)
Welcome to Our Family here at MIP... You have Def. Come to the Right Place for Growth, Fellowship, Support, And Love... The Fact that you are Here, and Reading the Lit. already, and Making way to get to meetings, I don't think you will have a problem finding comfort here! TONS of Experiences, Strength & Hope (aka..ESH) on every Corner...
So Keep Coming Back! Bless yourself with the Face to Face Meetings, and Watch your Miricle Come to Life, like it has for many of us!
Aloha No Maxine and welcome to the board...Blessings to you and your partner for the recovery work you are doing to attain sobriety, serenity and peace of mind. It will pay off. You are attended by Higher Power...God is. I hope you get into our face to face rooms. Cyber meeting is great and face to face awesome as we sit and listen to each other share Experience, Strength and Hope and support and guide each other thru this jungle called Alcoholism. Good thoughts and Prayers for you both...you are not alone. ((((hugs))))
Thank you guys so much, you just totally warmed my heart, im having a particular difficult day, (just one of them days where everything goes wrong) so just about to get on my knees, but wanted to say thank you for taking time to read and say hi :)
still getting to grips with remembering I have a new friend, My higher power, whom when I asked for help on occasions, I got what I asked for!!!!!, if that dont tell me this is all going to be fine then nothing will, I feel different since I started to accept things and its great, I just wish I had done this sooner, but if im honest, I dont think i was ready for this before, I was so ignorant and thought 'well,,HE'S the one with the problem!!!'' it took me to almost loose the love of my life, to work out that 'hey, I have a problem too!!!'' I always played the victim, everyone picked on me! it was everyone elses fault, poor me!!! well, how wrong could I have been, I believe god put me and my partner together so we could get well together and help other people, and when i feel confident enough I will, my partner has sponserd many people, he said i will be a great sponser, and i cant wait to help, but im not ready yet, :)
so again, thank you so much for your time, god bless you all
Your story struck a chord with me, although not an alcoholic or user, I have too used all sorts to fill the gaps in me. Also had a very controlling partner for 13 years and then fell in love with an alcoholic. The programme i believe is the only thing that will fill me, give me a purposeful life and above all serenity. Also like you i am fairly new. I haven't got a sponsor yet but do have a small homegroup which gives me much comfort.
I too have been having a bad few days, and realised last night the insanity of my own thinking is still very much active. I also realised how scared I am still, so back to the first 2 steps and really need to get a sponsor to help me through the steps.
So glad you have found us, love and support
Simone x
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What a caterpiller calls the end of the world....God calls a butterfly
Just be careful to work your own programs. I've gone to AA for a long time. I came here thinking that made me know a lot about alanon. It didn't. The love of your live is your higher power, yourself, then him (just the way I structure things so I don't put all the meaning in my life in the relationship basket again...been there and done that.)
Glad that you made it here but I also echo pinkchip. His program is HIS, and yours is YOURS. In just about every situation you have to say this: this is what he is gonna do, what are YOU gonna do? While I do not necessarily have the experience I have seen several times people on here say that an alcoholic needs to do their own program and you do your own and they should not be the same. He has an addiction to alcohol and needs to know how he is gonna deal with that problem and you have an addiction to other negative behaivors, which you need to deal with.
Hello everyone, thank you so much for your replies.
yes, absolutely, we will be working our own programs, he is addicted to alcohol and I am not, I understand we cant work the same way, we are very supportive to each other and can nudge each other along the way, but I need my own program to get myself well, I defo need a sponsor asap,, but my HP has seen me try and move heaven and earth to get to a meeting and I know hes knows Ill get my butt there as soon as I possibly can, I will get a sponsor and get well, Im practically living on the first 3 steps right now and praying everyday all day, My 'paths to recovery' is also close at hand,
so very happy to have found this site and so glad you have all took the time to reply,
