I think Diva finally understands and accepts. - Al-Anon Family Group

Diva · ~*Service Worker*~

I think Diva finally understands and accepts.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Diva wrote:
I had always fought against admitting. I am happy that I brought the subject up one last time. THose who have been here at MIP as long as I have know the struggle I have always had with the "disease concept." My "disease denial" kept me from finding serenity for myself.
Thanks again all of you. I send love and good wishes to all.
Diva

Dear Diva

I am so glad that you have found acceptance on this subject. I loved how you were able to release your anger, and resentment and feel the burden lift. Good job.

The above quote that I copied is really a powerful insight that is filled with clarity and recovery.

I am glad you are back.

AStrongerMe · ~*Service Worker*~

(((DIVA)))) I can't tell you how many times I've had to hear something several ways to "get it". I'm more thankful now that you are finding some peace in your life. Big hugs.

nyc018 · Senior Member

I have also struggled with this one a lot and I think acceptance is important, in whatever form it takes. For me I acknowledge that my AH has a brain disorder which makes him incapable of reacting to alchohol like most people do (these are his words). At the same time I am angry at him that he chose to drink even after he knew this, and I am angry for him for the behavior he exhibited while under the influence. I also realize that now that he has admitted he has this disease, he has chosen not to drink for the past year. For me, it is one thing to acknowledge that yes, it is a disease in that one cannot control their brain chemistry, but it does not give someone a blanket excuse to be insane, nasty, and irresponsible. I guess what I am getting at is that it is possible to accept it as a disease without accepting the "unacceptable" behavior that goes along with an active A, and without accepting that a person cannot choose to be sober in spite of it.

Pushka · ~*Service Worker*~

Hugs,

Something that has helped me a great deal was to hear a recovering A say .. I have a disease I am still responsible for the actions and consequences of my choices. I can't remember where I heard that .. if I heard it shared from the A or from someone else who heard it kind of thing .. however it stuck for me. It doesn't absolve them or give them a blanket excuse for the behavior. Personal responsibility is still personal responsibility. That's why it's so important the people work their own program of recovery to get to that place where they can see ohhh that's just not working for me and then they can do something different.

Hugs Diva,

I have always been hard headed in terms of addiction as a physical disease. I'm glad you were able to come to terms with it as a mental disease. I can't touch, feel or see if someone has a mental issue .. I can sure feel and see crazy behavior mine or someone else's. For me addiction = insanity in any form.

Hugs P :)

Jill · ~*Service Worker*~

Diva, Last night before I went to bed, I was moved by reading about your weight lifting. This morning I was having coffee on the balcony just as the Balloon Fiesta's Mass Ascension sent all the hot air balloons into the sky. They slowly floated up (at different altitudes) and to the north, and I thought of what you had said. It was a wonderful enactment for me of resentments and hatred leaving.
I am happy for you that you are freed from the toxins.
Jill

Aloha · ~*Service Worker*~

I've shared this in the past because I also found it really helpful to understand the whole disease thing better.

I read somewhere where someone was discussing mental illness and the person had wrote something to the effect of: "The human brain is an organ in the body that is subject to malfunction just like any other organ in the human body." That's where my lightbulb finally went off, too. Brains can malfunction just like the kidneys or the heart or the lungs or the immune system, etc.

Maiasaura · Member

Awesome :) I'm so glad.

david62 · ~*Service Worker*~

smile Yay!!!!

It always amazes me when I have a "sudden" realization about something I have misunderstood or just flat didn't know for so long.

Glad you keep asking questions and growing my friend.

I shall keep doing the same too!

(((Diva)))

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

yep, I have said it a hundred times. Our bodies need so much water to function. Every single organ, every tissue, down to tiny cells and further.

The brain is horribly affected. Not just when they drink either, it takes a long time to get the homeostasis back to a good solid balance.

And who has to do all that? The brain, which has been damaged from all the alcohol drying out affects and not properly hydrated.

Once I shared what made them have that red face. Hang overs are not funny.

I am so glad it finally stuck with you. Don't ya love those light bulb moments?

Am very happy for you my friend. I love how you get into your animals and more. Wish you were not so far away, would love to meet you and just listen! hugs, your friend,debilyn

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.