The material presented
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Have been with my boyfriend for 2 years (nearly) and recently he had to move into his brothers. We went out one night and it ended up pretty ugly (I'm no angel when I have a drink I must admit) and he has ended up with a 2 year probation order to help with his drinking and dodgy attitude towards me when drinking. He also lost his driving license about 3 weeks prior. He has been dry for 4 weeks (so he says, think I beleive him too) and getting counselling and has also been diagnosed with depression and on medication for this. Things have been going ok and he has been pretty focused and then last nite I found out he has been on a dating site talking to other women whilst he has been texting me swearing undying love for me. Anyway, I got the right arse and joined the site myself and had a chat with a few men but seriously they were all minging but I decided I 'had' to make a point. I told him by text I had joined the site and he turned it around saying maybe it was an excuse for me to get on the dating site. Today we had an argument on the phone and then he stopped texting .. which is really unlike him. I tried to ring him and he hung up and then turned his phone off. I rang his brothers later and after his brother telling me he hadnt seen him for 2 days (which was a really crap joke on his part) my boyfriend came on the phone and was very reluctant to speak ... I knew straight away he had been drinking (he said he had had some weed) and then pretty much hung up on me!!! I swear he's back on it ... he hasnt text all night so I guess he's feeling guilty behind all this. I did send a text calling him a 'Looser' but then felt bad after a while so sent text saying 'u ok??' but heard nothing since!!!! Am I in the wrong here because I just don't know anymore ... !!! Grrrr ....
Have you made it to any Al-anon meetings? The meetings help us to focus on ourselves, our reactions and behaviors. There is nothing you can do to control him and for me trying only made things worse. I hope you can get to meetings and work on your own program. Sending you love and support!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
sending support to you its very hard I know Im in the same situation and all I can say is that I'm glad I found Al-Anon. Y ou cannot change him he has to want to change and it seems like he isn't ready. Everything that you are going through I hope it gets easier and in time it should. keep coming here and reading the post they really help a lot.
Thankyou for your messages ... made me want to cry lol The nearest meetings to me are 40 miles away so it's not really feesible for me to get to them. I'll keep looking on here though as I think it might be just what I need :) Thankyou again x
