The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have a 38 y/o son and daughter-in-law who are drug addicts. My son is also an alcoholic sober for over 10 years. They have lost custody of their children. Am I in the right place for help or do I need to be with another narcotic family support group?
It sounds like you are in the right place to me. Welcome to MIP and I am glad you found us. I come from drug addicts and alcoholics and have found many similar traits in both. I have been greatly helped here and in face to face Al-anon meetings. Keep coming back and reading all the Al-anon literature you can get your hands on. The book "Getting Them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews was so very helpful for me in early recovery and almost anything Melody Beattie just because I was very codependent and enmeshed with my A's lives. I am sending you much love and support on your journey!
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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Derfinitely in the right place, and welcome to MIP.... Addictions, whether it be to alcohol, other drugs, etc - follow a very similar path, so you'll find lots of E,S&H here.... One book I'd highly recommend for you is "Getting Your Children Sober", written by Toby Rice Drews.
Keep coming back - this is a good place
Tom
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
its totally okay to be nervous. this is a weird new experience for a lot of us. remember that there are no wrong answers, and no right way to do al anon. people's individual programs and individual understandings of god/higher power are as varied and unique as people themselves!
I grew up in an alcoholic family and for many years people asked me if i wanted to go to al anon. I kept telling people no, its not for me, etc. eventually i went to a meeting and was completely floored with how much i related to what people had to say there. i felt uncomfortable sharing at a al anon meetings too for a while.
at this point i'm one year into al anon and i have changed in ways i didn't know were possible. i have found a lot more strength, serenity, and peace in my life...i actually ran into a friend yesterday who i hadn't seen since before al anon and they said "wow, you look REALLY relaxed!" I didn't know i could be this way a year ago.
If it feels more comfortable, just post stuff here. let us know how your doing and you will receive lots of support and acceptance. The meetings will always be there.
Thank you guys for the support. My husband and I went to our first Al anon meeting today and found it gratifying to be with others with similar problems. Our son and his wife's lives have been spiraling down over the last two years. He lost his job a year ago Christmas and found another in January. He was very active in the community and was the Grand Master at the Masonic Lodge. He held onto the second job until last July and then was let go. What we didn't realize is that both he and his wife had worked themselves up the drug ladder and were shooting heroin. We are normally in AZ for 6 months - Oct to May. When we were home for Christmas, our son and wife were arrested for selling and providing drugs. The Drug Enforcement Squad stormed his home with guns drawn, took anything that looked like evidence and his boys - 10 and 13 were put in custody of the grandparents (both her parents and we share caring for them). Since then, they have not been charged with a crime. They are both on MD prescribed Metadone for chronic pain and apparently continue to use other drugs. They lost their home and are living in a 23' travel trailer in a mobile park, neither are working and have failed to follow through on their urine tests. They are both very angry at us for "abandoning them when they needed us" and refuse to talk about their situation because "it makes them feel bad". Our son has wrecked his car in a rear ender and the youngest son was airlifted to a major city for GI bleeding in March. Fortunately, the are followed by the county and in some kind of outpatient rehab program where they attend a variety of meetings and classes and are required to appear before the judge periodically. I have been pretty stoic about all this, venting to my husband but when I received a text from my youngest grandson Friday night after a supervised visit at his other grandparents, saying "I will never forgive you for judging my parents and I am very ashamed of you", I realized that I needed help desperately. It seems that my life has completely turned upside down. Gone are our retirement plans and I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel. I appreciate your input and encouragement. S
There is hope and I have found so much here at MIP and in Al-anon meetings and with my sponsor. Keep coming back and reading. Sending you love and support!
__________________
Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree
Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666
" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."
"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
