The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I heard this today, and it really resonated with me. It's something a psychotherapist said to a contestant on The Biggest Loser several years ago, as he spoke about being abused as a child. They talked about the trauma of living that way for so long, and how it colors every single thing you do until you decide to face the demons and then release them to the universe.
There have definitely been days, weeks, months when I have felt like I am absolutely in the trenches, fighting hand-to-hand combat. And the exhaustion after those periods is very real...exhaustion from fighting that war.
Part of my recovery has been trying to accept that, unlike that television show contestant who was abused as a child, I can CHOOSE to leave this war. I can throw up the white flag, exit the battlefield, and live my life with faith and hope that some day the war will end, but knowing that if the war continues forever and ever it does not have to drag me down into the trenches again. Because it's not my war, and I don't have to let the disease drag me into it anymore.