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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> oh my why why me.
Post Info TOPIC: oh my why why me.
silent


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oh my why why me.
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im now going on a mth of separation from my a/d b/f and for the last 3 days ive had to sit on my hands to keep from picking that phone up and calling him,im feeling soo lonesone,insecurity at its ups,i stay as busy as i can tiill i just drop in the bed at nite,sometime to tired to even put my cpap mask on for my sleepapnea and sometimes too tired to take my nirtime meds or even eat the right foods ,im killing my self whats going on with me and now all i can think of during the day is him ,him ,him whats he doing,asking questions to what he is doing to my freind that usually tells me,i cant be doing this its beginning to take its toll on me i know this too will pass but what do i do in the mean time with all these feelings coming back to me ,its like ive got to have a man in my life,ew thats scary,i walk i tend to my flowers i got me a diff. haircut,ive put highlights in my hair trying to keep the focus on me but im still literally crying and heartbroken on the inside its tearing me   to  pieces,im haveing such a hard time with exscepting others,i dunno ,i need some real good esh here ty....hugs silent,,,im in trouble if i take him back i do know that it would be a complete disaster this time if i were to take him back,oh oh oh my....help......anxiety level is riseing,but i got meds for that too,but aint working so well for this,hugs silent



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Pushka


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None of us got here over night and it's going to take time. All you can do is the best that you can do on any given day and some days it's literally min by min.

Do you have any alanon lit that you can read? That helps, I know you've mentioned in the past you are unable to get out for meetings. There are meetings here online and I would make those a priority for myself. Anything that would help aide me in recovery. Are you able to get out at all of your apartment? That would help as well. If you have a hobby where you don't have to focus 100% on him.

It does get easier it just takes time and you really have to be gentle with yourself as you walk through recovery.

Hugs p :)

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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
orchidlover


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I think some people call this withdrawal.

I know it was very very very hard for me to leave the ex A.  I spent a lot of time missing him then castigating myself that I missed what/ heart ache, drama and arguing?

I think I missed the illusion I had created.

Of course all the cycle around and around the circle makes it easier to find a justification to call, to think that this time it would be different.  If you have a chance get the book, Getting them Sober.  Its a very good lay out of what to expect, what to know and how to learn to do self care.

maresie.



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orchid lover
Aloha


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Aloha silent.

Have you been getting to any Al-Anon meetings? i know for me hitting meetings - as many as I could in a week - certainly kept my focus on my recovery and removed from me any feelings of loneliness.

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Debilyn


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My esh is, when I went thru that, I told myself, why bother, he does not care.

that was that. over time I quit even thinking about it hon. He will never give you what you need anyway.

If you take care of you, eat right,drink good stuff, go for walks go see friends, you will feel better faster.

I lived on already cooked chicken and canned enchiladas.

hugs hugs debilyn



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

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pinkchip


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Go to an alanon meeting. I kept the same set of problems until I actually got busy living in the solution instead of the problem.

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Ariel


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Its going to take time. My mom ised to say its like getting used to living without an arm. Sometimes it takes a long time, but you cant run & you have to go thru the hurt, the worst kind of pain & hurt there is. But nobody has ever died from it, and you will come out on the other side. Maybe dating would help, just to get yourself out there? So you are not ruminating over him, and keeping yourself open to the chance of going back.

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