I will not ring him!!!! - Al-Anon Family Group

Bargee · Veteran Member

I will not ring him!!!!

dragonflys · Senior Member

((((Bargee))))

It is not silly of you to hope for anything. You are living with an addict and that is so hard. Like many of us on this board, we know how hard it is.

Sending you hugs, love and support

Too hard · Senior Member

I know how this is.....

But you are just starting to make a change in your actions and re-actions.

Your change is the beginning of allowing him to hopefully get into trouble over time and be forced to take responsibility for his behaviour.

Take care of yourself. T.H.

Bargee · Veteran Member

Thanks all.

I didn't ring him.
He came home about an hour ago.
He didn't even tell me where he had been.
I asked him if he had worked late, I know I shouldn't have asked, but hmm...
Anyway he said 'Oh nah I went to my mates house'.
I left it at that, but I'm pretty sure he had a couple of beers.
I've got soccer practice tomorrow. I haven't told him yet that I don't want him to look after our daughter.
He is going to get so angry with me.

Bettina · ~*Service Worker*~

Just remember the changes your making are for you, till it becomes 2nd nature. Its not to manipulate the alcoholic into not drinking. He's going to drink no matter what you do.

You will never know what it will take to make him stop. You did good by not calling him.

Keep living it , One Day at a Time...

Luv, Bettina

-- Edited by Bettina on Tuesday 15th of May 2012 03:52:13 PM

sookie · Senior Member

Bargee--I know what you are going through with your daughter. I had to entirely restructure my life because he could no longer be trusted to care for the children. It is heart wrenching on SO many levels but you are doing the right thing. (HUGS) Keep coming back. You are definitely not alone and you can do this. It is possible for things to get better, with all the weight and anxiety lifted as you work the program. You are doing GREAT.

Bargee · Veteran Member

Thanks so much everybody and to be honest, once I got over that sick feeling in my stomach, I did feel good about myself for not ringing and I proved to myself that I do not need him. I already knew that, but it's nice to remember it every once in a while.
I had put our daughter to bed, lit the fire, started tea, did a load of washing, folded the other washing. I was worn out after my second day back at work, but I still did it.

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