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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> So much for hope
Post Info TOPIC: So much for hope
pineapple


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So much for hope
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As mentioned in my previous post my A went over a week without drinking. It was not by choice, it was because he lost his wallet and ATM card. He had no money and I wouldn't give him any. He was starting to look better and he said he felt better. I was hopeful that this might be a new beginning for him. Silly me. I returned home today after being gone for a few days at the place I am housesitting. A had obviously been drinking. I don't know how he got money to buy booze. Maybe he sold some of his things. Maybe he found a hidden bottle that he'd forgot about. I'm just glad that while hopeful, I had no expectations. But I'm afraid that after this (and so many times before) I don't think I'll even be able to have hope again. I've heard it said that as long as they're alive, there's hope. Maybe I'll feel that way again, but I can't imagine it right now.



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hotrod


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(((Pineapple)))
 
I do so understand. It is so very painful when we are again faced with the reality of this disease. I know I learned to Hope and Pray that no matter what happened that I would be able to handle it with courage , serenity and wisdom.
 
 I never regretted entertaining that hope because that hope was never dashed 
 
 
In my thoughts


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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

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GailMichelle


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Pineapple,

So sorry.  I know the feeling.  I was in your shoes so many times that I lost count.

Based on my husband's experiences, I still say "if they are breathing, there is hope.  But - get on with your own life."

My husband had to wait til death was knocking at his door before he decided to give sobriety and AA a good try.

It was when I lost all hope that he made a turnaround.

Take care of you.  It's his job to do the same



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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light.  Lama Surya Das

Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die.  Malachy McCourt
Oksie


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I am sorry you are going through this pineapple.

Theres always hope... you are doing the right thing asking/questioning your own expectations however.

Stay strong

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Breakingfree


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Sending you lots of love and support!!!

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
pineapple


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Thank you all for your replies. You know, two years or even a year ago, when this would happen it just tore me apart. This time my reaction was more ¨Well, it's too bad, but life goes on.¨ Not that it doesn't affect me, it does. But these days I have my own life to concentrate on and that's what I'm doing.

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Dolly Llama


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^That is awesome.

A wise friend told me once, when I was in the throes of an incident with my drunken spouse...your situation may be hopeless, but *you* are not hopeless.

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Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible be found in us. -from Pema Chödron's When Things Fall Apart
canadianguy


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Thanks for posting.....

Who knows - their recovery is a long and complicated process.... in the end, maybe that week of sobriety/clarity will help him find what he needs to find....

As long as he's breathing... there is hope....

Recovery is seldom a straight line, and another person's recovery NEVER follows our timelines....

 

Take care

Tom

 



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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"

"What you think of me is none of my business"

"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"

 

 

 

 
Pushka


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Hugs Pineapple,

Sending you sooooo much love and support.

Hugs P :)

"Recovery is seldom a straight line, and another person's recovery NEVER follows our timelines.... "

Thanks for this Tom .. I really needed it today.

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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
orchidlover


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Sorry to hear this.  I know you are doing all you can to detach and its very very difficult.

Maresie.



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Debilyn


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Oh no. I am so sad for you honey! tears in my eyes!

We cannot help that we have hope, and want the best for our A's or anyone! Just shows what a good person you are.

For me once I realized the ex did not care about me at all, I completely let it all go. took awhile though!

Now its weird to not remember the feelings I used to have.

Anyway hope you are still able to get away and get into your own goals again. I am glad you got to see a glimpse of the man you loved. That is precious.

Huge those critters for me, debilyn



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