The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I spoke to my husband about returning to Al- Anon and returning to therapy. It was hard for him to understand- why would I need to go to therapy and meetings since he is not drinking. I really was able to communicate my struggles the past few months, my insecurities, my lack of trust, my resentments, and my feelings of feeling alone. It was hard for him to hear, but he thanked me for my honesty. He knew that I have not been myself for the past few months. I feel like I have been in a state of numbness. I am beginning to feel a bit better just with the thought that I will be working on my own recovery. Tomorrow is my first therapy session and Al-anon meeting. It took me along time to get back because I just didn't have the motivation. I know in my heart how much work it will take to stay on program and have decided to take it one step at a time. It won't be an easy journey, but I am hoping to get a sense of myself once again. I don't think I have ever lived my life being true to myself. I always admire people that are able to do that. I have spent too many years in fear and intimination. I guess its never too old to get to know yourself. Thanks for listening emil
Good for you for reaching out! It's not easy to stand up and say hey I need some additional help.
For me going to alanon is not about any one person outside of myself. My past has been affecting my present which colors my future. I don't like the color of my future. It's nice to know I get the opportunity to change that perception for myself.
Discovering new things about yourself is one of the gifts of alanon. Keep coming back you are worth it!!
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
emil...Mahalo for the honest inventory and example of courage. That is just the mentoring I am needing at this point in my program also...that and staying still and listening for HP's direction. (((((hugs)))))
I went back to my face to face meeting last night and all day I have felt stronger. I know now that I need to continue to work on my program and listen and look for signs from my higher power. I think I was afraid that my restment and anger may have been so deep that I may have fallen out of love with husband. I will continue to separate the two and really work on myself. Reading the words " Let Go, and Let God" reminded me of my deep believe and trust I have in my higher power. Accepting this is a part of my life will give the strength to take this journey in search. of the true me. This board is another avenue where I feel a great deal of support. It takes courage and trying to brave to search for answers and aceptance. Now if I could figure out how to get on to an online meeting. Please send any feedback ou can. Thanks Emil
