The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
LOL .. I know we are already into the new year however push has come to shove at this point and I'm actually pretty ticked off at the moment as well as massively hurt.
Feelings aren't facts so I'm trying not to make any major decisions at this point and time. I am very angry. I feel deceived, let down and hot damn we aren't even talking about a relapse here.
I have decided and today absolutely validates this decision. Anger and pain are great motivators for change. I'm going back to school and I'm going to really put the focus on me this year. I know it's something I will have to practice every single day.
People are going to do what they are going to do .. what am I going to do? Make changes in a positive direction in my best interests.
May I have this resolve by June of this year!! Thank you God for the simple fact I have a meeting tonight and I am so extremely grateful for that!!
Hugs P :)
__________________
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
It sounds like you are doing a great job channeling your feelings into positive actions for yourself and focusing on your own growth. Some of the best things that ever happened to me where outcomes of pain. We never know when something can be a blessing in disguise. Keep up the good attitude and sending you esh!
Thanks, it has been a rough day around here and it got better tonight did I mention how grateful I was there was a meeting. Thank you God for following up tomorrow with therapy .. geeze that couldn't have been planned better.
I think my eyeballs are going to feel like sandpaper in the morning. I can't remember the last time I've cried like this and I really cried because I actually felt something. 2 years ago nothing, I didn't even cry when I broke my ankle and it was an ugly break .. that's me though suck it up, it has always been "fine". Last year 3 letters D.U.I I was a hot mess and this year I cry because I hurt, and I'm not trying to fight it off anymore. This is a very big step for me. It's many years of past and present pain, it's not a pity party thing either it just is. It feels good to feel. It is a little overwhelming though I feel like someone forgot to turn off the faucet to my eyeballs. I'm hoping this is just a full moon deal and tomorrow will be better in terms of I will feel less unbalanced.
The best part is I do feel positive and I do feel like things are going to be ok regardless of what the final outcome is I'm going to be ok, the kids are going to be ok. I'm just emotionally spent right this second and I hope I can get some good sleep!!!
Hugs P :)
__________________
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
