he has a heart? - Al-Anon Family Group

KimK · Veteran Member

he has a heart?

KimK · Veteran Member

Oh yeah, the title of my post.....he bought tires for my car. He claimed he did this because he has a heart. I had a flat tire and my dad made him feel bad that my tires were awful. Otherwise, he wouldn't have noticed.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi Kim

I know how demoralizing conversations like the one you just had can be. You were wise to come here and vent.

Please remember that you must keep on taking care of you. Finishing school is important to your well being and self esteem.. Your partner does not have to understand that nor even agree,. Simply state your opinion and allow him to voice his opinion. Validate your need to finish school and know that this will be over in a few short months

Use the serenity prayer, ODAT you are not alone.

Glad you got those tires smile

Breakingfree · ~*Service Worker*~

Good job on coming here to vent and sticking with your goals. Keep up the good work. Sending you love and support on your journey!

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

Talk about catching one in a vulinerable position!

We learn in Al Anon to take care of us. Going to school is a wonderful IMPORTANT goal.

I was told when I went back to not let anyone or anything stop me. And I didn't. I am a much,much better person because of it.

I hope you continue, some people like to keep us down so they can control us. I was never one to be controlled.

We never know when we might need that education. Part of what we learn is way more than academics. It's making goals and keeping them, being under pressure and doing things on time. Learning to research, to push ourselves to limits we did not think we could do.

If I could give advice I would tell you what was told to me. wink.

hugs, you go girl! love,debilyn

GailMichelle · ~*Service Worker*~

Hi KimK,

You don't have long to go until you can obtain a job that will support you well if needed. It doesn't matter how much money your hubby makes. He could be the richest man in the world - doesn't matter.

There are many nurses in my family. They all work varied positions in varied environments. Nursing provides one many options. You could even become a "traveling nurse" and see the country.

PLEEEEEEEEEEEZ stay in school. I hope you are able to get to meetings. I know your schooling is very time consuming. But try to squeeze a meeting in at least once a week if you can.

Use your Al-Anon tools with hubby. Don't take anything he says or does personally. If I had to do it all over again, I would do the above-mentioned.

tommyecat · ~*Service Worker*~

Kim,

I wanted to send you support on finishing school. I think you have mentioned it before and it sounded like it was in your best interest to finish your degree.

Sending you encouragement and support to do it one day at a time.

xoxo, T

KimK · Veteran Member

You guys are so wonderful....Thanks for the support...Had to take my son and go to my parents house last night...He just wouldn't stop putting me down...I had my headphones in which he couldn't see with my long hair so I was able to drown a lot of it out, but he wouldn't go to bed so we left, and I'm glad I did. Got a good night sleep cuddled up next to my son. So, we are back home for the moment anyway. Play it by ear..

I am absolutely not quitting school. I have worked so hard to get this far, and it's so close. I talked with my parent's last night...and I always have a home there. They don't drink at all....I would like to stay here until after Christmas break if that is possible...If not, then I will go.

He just makes my mind very tired....Completely unnecessary....The arrogance makes me want to bop him in the head...lol

And hotrod....I'm happy I got the tires too..:)

Thanks guys...

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