Hi All :0) First a Mini Update...

MIL Home & Doing Alot Better.. . & Gram is HOME :) And Back to Put'n around Like only she knows how... So BIG THANK YOU To All of You that Kept us in your Prayers... They have Lifted them all back to "Better" health, and on their way to Recovery... So Thanks So Much...Can Not Tell You How Grateful I Am...

Ya Know... After Going thru these last couple ups & downs, I have learned alot about myself, and how I feel about things... My Thoughts seem to Flow at a Better Place when I land softly in my Program... I have No Desire to try & Control or Change the natural way of things.. Do I at times Put those Shoes On & Parade around? Of Course... But the Desire is definately becoming Less & Less...

I Can Honestly say that I am At a Good Place... Not a "Move any Mountains" kinda Place, but a Place where when I Know in My Heart, Why And What it is That I do, and How I Feel about that... That is All new to me, I don't Really think until I Joined Al-Anon/ACOA that i Realized that I Even Had Feelings I don't Believe... I was so Use to Brushin them Off, that I let go of what they felt like once I released them...

Course that could be why growing up,  i was all the "Silent One" or the one that made everyone laugh, I don't remember being angry much, but, that was only until the Limit was reached then my Head would spin...lol.. Its Funny now Really, because NOW... My Son will Look at me and Know I about to snap and say "Calmly" .. "Mommmmm... God Grant Me the Serenityyyyyy" ... Its Kinda our "Road Rage" signal to Take a Deep Breathe, and Let it Go...lol.. He loves it, for as he says the 1st verse, I then Spew out (more gracefully now) the 2nd Verse, "To Accept the _________  " and it releases it and off we go...

So I Guess I'm not the only one Learning somethings, and its nice that he and I can Laugh about it, and that always helps remind me, how non useful  it was to begin with...

I Learned that regardless of the "Woo-As-Me" Moments are availible, they are nothing more then Choices... The Choices I Make Are Now For Me! I love the realization that I Can, & I don't Need Reason to negotiate I Can't...

I Can Also Honestly say that I am Grateful My Life is Full, and Hectic, & Sometimes Clear Out of Control.. (On a Non Vilent level) of Course, because for me, that tells me that Life is Happening Before my Eyes, and I Get to be Witness to it.. Every day has brought on the Next, and weather I am Sitting in my Office Taking a "Stress Relief" email, or Hangin at the Soccer Field, or doing a favor for someone or driving down the road in my truck... I have Self Worth, Regardless of how the Outside world Views me, or Judges me, and I'm Currently Ok With that... I remind Myself Daily the Blessing In My Life.. There are Days the List is a Little Harder to squeeze, so I start back at One,  but that is only telling me I need to Clear my head and Get back to it, instead of Holding on to something that may or may not ever change or be any more then it is... I've been trying my Best to Accept Life on Lifes' Terms... Been Bumpy but Managable :)

I Can Get up and Know that Today was a Good Day, because I Made it One, Not because I Sat around and waited on someone to hand it too me, or make it happy For Me... It was a Good Day Because I Got Up and Made the Choice, Not to see it Any Other Way... So TODAY... Is a Good Day ... I'm Currently Looking out a Sun Shiney Window, at the Most Beautiful Fall Leaves dancin on the Mountain in front of my Office, with the Door Open and Nice Breeze rolling in, I don't think for me... It Could get much better then this...I'll Just Pray HP Helps me stay here for a while...

Again, Thank You All So Much for Your Kindness, Your Compassion, Your ESH, Your Love & Your Prayers... These all are the Very things, that I Hope to Carry to others, and to keep for myself... Its Amazing what God Can Do.... When I Let Him!

Thanks for Letting me Share :0)

Love, Hugs & Prayers to all

Jozie