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Working in a toxic enviornment. I know I can't change the people and their gossip and lies etc. I can't change the fact that they don't love me....etc. It bothers me what they think and say about me and how their lies may or may not influence the manager etc. I need to change myself and be consumed with serenity NOT anxiety and what others think and say. Any comments or specific literature slogans etc. Please Help. Thanks
wow... I just got a talking to from my boss (she was good about it) that a few people in my workplace are unhappy with me and the way I talk. I have been asked to keep it down. Rumours are running around and the place is not comfortable.
I am saying to myself the whole time "What other people think of me is none of my business"
Yes I will more aware of my voice level, I will use my mobile outside of the office, I will take on board some of the things she said to help improve me and be more aware of myself.
I will not take it personally what has been said about me and not to me. If they were confident people, and able to come to me, then they would and I would discuss it with them. Obviously they don't want to do that so.... I am not going to talk to myself about it.
Believe it or not Co Dependent No More is a great book by Melodie Beattie, you can get it at the library or on amazon new or used. You aren't going to control what others think of you, they are going to think what they think and it's really more important about how you feel about yourself and what you want.
I love QTIP (Quit Taking It Personally). If I feel defensive I QTIP it!! What Linda mentioned what other people think of me is none of my business. I get more done minding my own business (lol .. that's not a slogan I do say that to myself from time to time). Let Go and Let God. Youfoundme says Let It Be, I like that one too.
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
This is a tricky one this, when I have been on a downer I could take everything personally, it was deep rooted in me from my home life, and messed up head, I didn't care very much for or about myself, because I felt worthless and unlovable, I put this down to my husband loving drink more than me, but basically I hadn't learnt about loving myself, I used to beable justify everything and anything, because I didn't know I didn't know, I can remember being floored by comments, for months years, and then coming here I learnt people show you who they really are, and I love that saying, Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind, I have learnt that what people say is more about them than me, and so I turn that on myself and think my conduct is mine and all that I have to do is keep my side of the street clean, how often my head has distorted truths and sent me spiralling out of control, CONTROL, of which I have none over anything other than myself.
There is another member on this board whose philosophy came to mind when I read this post. It is: What someone else thinks of me is none of my business.
For me, through the program I found I have given away the things I hold most dear in my life, my peace, serenity, happiness and joy. I turned my will and my life over to the care of anyone else but a power greater than myself. When I made the conscious effort to turn my will and my life over to a power greater than myself (step 3), I found I was less likely to have an emotional slip giving my serenity and sanity away to sick people.
What others think of me is none of my business I live everyday by this saying, it was a little hard in the beginning for me to believe in that saying the more I said or thought it the more it was re-enforced in my subconsious. And today I can truthfully say I am not interested what other people think of me as long as I am working my program and becoming the person my HP wants me to be. I know I will always be a work in progress and never please everyone, with that said as long as I am at peace with myself, my behaviors and actions I am good to go. Keep workin the program as it works in ALL aspects of your life and the program will work for you ! Blessings
