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Our f2f meeting this morning was on self esteem and self worth it was amazing , some of us seek it from our work others from our relationships and most of us from our partners who were too sick to give any encouragement for our efforts . most of us were people pleasers at one time but also resented the requests from others did things we didnt want to do or didnt have time to do just to keep the relationship going and not hurt anyones feelings forgetting that most people didnt give our feelings a thought they just wanted what they wanted NOW. When I arrived in this program I was very arrogant and came with a closed mind , until one old timmer said to me after a meeting on self esteem soooooo you think your ok , you like yourself just the way you are and I replied yes I do he said hmmmmmm if your so comfy with yourself why are you allowing yourself to be treated this way ??? I just stared at him I knew he had me pegged right and was not impressed . One lesson hard for me to swallow was that I taught people how to treat me and because of my silence they assumed that what they were doing was okay with me -- go figure . This prog gave me the courage to say enough I will not listen if you cannot talk to me with respect no more hollering at me, talk to me the way you do other people or this conversation is over didnt take long for husb to know that I was serious and things started to change .I had no boundaries in our relationship that was the first one I set and stuck to many others have followed . A little quote that stuck in my mind was If your tired of being treated like a door mat - get up off the floor !!! You cant fake self esteem you either have it or you dont. Louise
A little quote that stuck in my mind was If your tired of being treated like a door mat - get up off the floor !!!
Abby I LOVE this quote I use it all the time now. It's the total truth when it comes to how we allow others to treat us.
Hugs thank you for the share!! :)
P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Ive heard it said that self esteem is just that, SELF esteem. It's not friend esteem, husband esteem, child esteem...therefore we must rely on ourselves to create and maintain it.
Louise, thank you so much for sharing this here, bringing it back to this board. I needed to hear this tonight. I really and truly did. I am learning to say no, No is a complete sentence. And when I can't say no, I am learning to say "I will think about it" before I say yes. Thank you for this. time and time again I have said yes to things that I really didn't want to do. Slowly, I am gaining the self esteem and awareness to say No. Thank you thank you... HUGS...
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-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
Hi Louise, thanks for the share! I love this positive self esteem and self worth work! And I love the doormat quote! Time to get off the floor! I'm not going to lay there any more crying about why everyone's walking on me!
Love the topic . Self esteem and Self Worth are both a huge gift I received by working the alanon program.
My sponsor kept it simple ----She told me that self esteem was gained by doing "Esteem able" things. Wow. Living the alanon program, the slogans, steps and placing Principles above Personalities changed my life, my attitudes and all my relationships.