The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I found this bit about resentment on the hazeldon.org site and thought I would share:
Resentments are the blocks that hold us back from loving others and ourselves. Resentments do not punish the other person. They punish us. They become barriers to feeling good and enjoying life.
Resentments are hardened chunks of anger. They loosen up and dissolve with forgiveness and letting go.
Letting go of resentments does not mean we allow the other person to do anything to us that he or she wants. It means we accept what happened in the past, and we set boundaries for the future. We can let go of resentments and still have boundaries.
We try to see the good in the person or the good that ultimately evolved from whatever incident we feel resentful about. We try to see our part.
Then we put the incident to rest.
Praying for those we resent helps. Asking God to take our resentments from us helps too.
Higher Power, help me become ready to let go of my resentments. Bring any resentment that is hidden within me, and blocking me, to the surface. Show me what I need to do to take care of my self by letting go of resentments, and then help me do that.
Great share! My mother was filled with bitterness for so much of her life. This is a good reminder that I never want to become like that.
In the words of Howard Thurman: "I want to be more loving. Often there are good and sufficient reasons for exercising what seems a clean direct resentment. Again and again, I find it hard to hold in check the sharp retort, the biting comeback when it seems that someone has done violence to my self-respect and decent regard. How natural it seems to "give as good as I get," to "take nothing lying down," to announce to all and sundry in a thousand ways that "no one can run over me and get away with it!" All this is a part of the thicket in which my heart gets caught again and again. Deep within me, I want to be more loving--to glow with a warmth that will take the chill off the room which I share with those whose lives touch mine in the traffic of my goings and comings. I want to be more loving! I want to be more loving in my heart! It is often easy to have the idea in mind, the plan to be more loving. To see it with my mind and give assent to the thought of being loving--this is crystal clear. But I want to be more loving in my heart! I must feel like loving. I must ease the tension in my heart that ejects the sharp barb, the stinging word. I want to be more loving in my heart that, with unconscious awareness and deliberate intent, I shall be a kind, a gracious human being. Thus, those who walk the way with me may find it easier to love, to be gracious because of the love of God that is increasingly expressed in my living. I want to be more loving in my heart!"
Hey mollyann... thankyou for the post on resentments... you'll never believe it but my real name is molly anne.... mo123 in the chat room. Take Care of U girl... and I love your name!!!