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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> should I or shouldn't I ? need advice!
Post Info TOPIC: should I or shouldn't I ? need advice!
Hoot Nanny


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I am sitting here wondering if I should bother to make the trip home for my sister's wedding. I am 900 miles away & have to fly I think. My mom booked her flights a few months ago--come to find out the wedding wasn't planned until recently--around my mom's schedule. I found out yesterday. Can I spend a bunch of money for the wedding she never had thusly probably borrowing from my mom for a flight that I may not even get on--do you see what I am saying.

The last time I was in CA was 2007 for my grandma's memorial. I want to see my dad(He as been sick as you know) & I want to spend time w/ most of my family like when I was there almost 2 1/2 years ago. I am so debating & praying for the right thing to do. It is so compicated but easy at the same time. I would normally go in a heartbeat. If I am able, I REALLY want to go.

But, if I don't see it as God's will--if it becomes too compicated maybe it isn't worth it? What do you all think? I can't deplete my savings right now either.I am between a rock & a hard place.

I need advice as soon as possible.

May 14th by the way! It just makes me feel so left out of the process & makes me feel sad.

Kathleen



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Hoot Nanny
Debilyn


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Ok when I am in a place like you, I think about, "ok if I was sitting in my rocking chair, old, would I regret that I did not go?"This has always helped me. We have this time now, what is it you really want?

I wanted my ex ah all my life. I knew I wanted to marry him no question. I knew if I did not give it my all I would regret it. So I married him, I was blessed with being with him during the best time in his life. I was so loved and spoiled.

Sadly as you know how it ended. BUT I have no regrets. Some people can live with regrets. I choose not to. Sometimes the hardest choices teach you the most, whether it goes well or not.

I know if I see a homeless person on the side of the road, I will give them money. If I don't, I regret it. Maybe they are cons, maybe not. The important thing is, I gave.

Money really has never stopped me from anything that was important to me. Even when I was homeless living in my barn bunkhouse, I struggled and made it. I was so miserable from AH being gone, I coulda been a billionare and it would not have mattered.

soooo I hope you do what makes you feel the best! You would get to see your dad right? priceless.

love,deb

 



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RLC


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Hoot,

No advice......just remembering what I was told the first time I walked through the doors of Al-Anon...."Always take care of yourself first"....If you keep those words in mind you can't go wrong.

HUGS,
RLC

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GailMichelle


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I echo RLC's reponse. That is what my life's experiences indicate.

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Christy


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Just wondering..would HP have to drop money in your lap to give you a sign?  (j/k)

Ultimately it's up to you.  We have been granted free will along with choosing what we want for ourselves.  I kinda do what I want and if I keep hitting walls then I rethink it.

Christy

 



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likemyheart


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Ever hear of flipping a coin and if you are disappointed with the results, you know what you really want to do?

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I am strong in the broken places. ~ Unknown All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another! ~ Anatole France
Jerry F


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Free will is good info...add courage to that and you're with family.

Pack your program with you when you leave.  Don't leave home without it.  Nother thing just for me I believe that the will of HP is Love and like Mother Teresa said "love Always" soooo...wear love when you leave the house and get to the airport.  I also have come to understand, for me, that Love is the opposite of fear.  If you stay in love you will not have to worry about fear.   Just for me; take what you like and leave the rest and here's some (((((hugs))))) smile



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tommyecat


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Alanon is a program of suggestion through the sharing of personal experience, strength and hope. We have a saying, take what you like and leave the rest. The opinions expressed here were strictly those of the person who gave them. Any given day I can be mistaken for a newcomer. My best thinking got me in Alanon. Beware of advice giving. Collectively if "we" don't know how to live our own lives, we cannot advise others how to live theirs.


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