The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well, last June I attended my first Al-Anon meeting. It was a speaker's meeting, so I didn't have to sweat having to say anything. After is was over, I quickly showed myself to the door.
I'm going back tonight. I'm going to stick around this time 'cuz I feel the need.
Let ya all know how it goes.
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
The meeting went fine. I think I was the newest newcomer. Another lady was there for the second or third time.
The topic was surrender. I felt a little uneasy since I didn't know anyone. But I chose to speak when they asked if I'd like to share. I shared that tonight I finally "surrendered" to the possibility that I might benefit from meetings.
I'm returning again and again until I know if it's where I belong.
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
YAY !!!! I have been working my program online 2 1/2 yrs now. Partly due to my disabilities and partly due to all or most of the Alanon meeting around me have closed. But one of the member here did her homework one day, found a group that just started up near me and I went ( YAY ) and then this past weeken went again. While I owe my life and sanity to overyone here and I have worked hard at my program, improved 100% lol it is quite different going to a f2f where I actually have to get out of my comfort zone and pu myself out there. I'll be going back Blessings
Good for you! Hey it takes a lot of courage to walk into somewhere new! Wow and you spoke at one too!. I was quiet for a long time. Could not stop crying. ugh.
the group hug bothered me. I don't really like hugging strangers...my problem. I am a hugger with my loved ones and spiritual bros and sis.
Anyway you are on a great path now! I will love hearing updates! You are encouraging others by sharing.
love,deb
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Putting HP first, always <(*@*)>
"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."
Thanks for the encouragement! I do hope that my sharing of this will inspire others to try meetings, too, if they're available in their areas.
It felt good to get out of my comfort zone. I've been isloating myself again. I've been distanting myself with my close friends. One dear friend is ACOA (her mother). She is also going through a challenging time in her life, so I don't try to talk with her about my situation with ex-AH too much.
It was a good feeling to be in a room full of people who I felt understood (KNOW understood) and who were there to share their ESH. It is good to know that I have a place to go to share and not feel I'm burdening anyone. Make sense?
So............ yes, good to have pushed myself out the door and into a meeting. (It took 3 years of contemplation and 1 visit last summer before I decided to give meetings a real chance.) When asked if I wanted to share, I overcame the urge to decline. I'm striving to overcome the concern of what others think of me, so I went for it. It was a great opportunity to practice that!
I assume all meetings have first timers speak last. True? I was informed at the beginning of the meeting that after all spoke I would have an opportunity to speak. Funny, my ego at first was put off. Humph! I have to go last? Isn't that the way it's always been with me? Always last! (In school I was always last because my maiden name began with a Z. Oh, get over it, Gail!) But I quickly realized those were outdated, erroneous tapes, so I got over it quickly and began to talk. I think it helps too that I'm not at the beginning stages of recovery.
Any who.... thanks for the encouragement! I'm looking forward to go to my next one. This particular group meets on Tuesday nights.
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt