The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I wrote earlier this week about my AH being away at his parents for the week. I stated how much I enjoyed his absence. Well...he's coming back tomorrow and I don't want him to! My stomach is starting to act up and I think it is the stress of knowing he is returning. I was having a huge belly-laugh with my girls this afternoon and it struck me that I haven't laughed like that in a long while...it took six days of his absence for me to come out of my sick fog and really laugh...but I did it, and it felt great. Sadly, he believes that things are better than ever (in our marriage) and claims he misses me terribly. I wonder if he really does miss me, if he just thinks he misses me, or if he is just saying what he thinks he needs to say for this charade to continue. It's ironic, isn't it...he is looking forward to coming home to his family and I am looking for a way out...even to the point of searching the local houses for sale, just for "fun". I wish I knew the answers...
Turning it over to a power greater than yourself is what works for me. My answer might not come as quick as I would like but it will come in HP's time not my time. It takes the pressure off and the projections out of the picture. Put your best foot forward, and use the right body language when your husband returns. Stay positive and allow HP to work his miracles.
Might be a good time to ask the question "Do I have options to this or do I have no choice in the matter." You always have choices. Talking about him returning when you are not ready is an option...just saying "Hold it, I'm not ready yet!!" is an option.
The serenity pray says in part "The courage to change the things I can..." Pray for courage and choose for your serenity. Keep coming back ((((hugs))))
