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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Went to my 1st f2f meeting Saturday
Post Info TOPIC: Went to my 1st f2f meeting Saturday
floridawife


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Went to my 1st f2f meeting Saturday
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So I went to my first f2f meeting on Saturday. WOW, That was hard!!! I honestly didn't think it would be that hard. I think I started crying before the meeting even started. I calmed down some until the subject of detachment came up. That is a tough subject for me and something I am having trouble with. I know it is necessary but how do you detach yourself when you have 2 small kids involved? If it was just my AH and me, fine let him stew in his own mess, but I have to look out for the wellbeing of our children, someone has to, and it obviously isn't him, so that leaves me. I will get there, but for now I am a little emotional. I am trying to take it One day at a time, for now. I will go to meeting again on Saturday and see how we do.  

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DreamXL


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http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/

One of the best articles i have ever read on detachment...it even gives directions :) 

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canadianguy


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Hi... in reading your post, I am guessing that it is often all about perspective.... Another way of looking at things is that your recovery/well being is "even more" important due to the fact that you have two children to concern yourself about....
Detachment does not equal "accepting unacceptable behavior"....

Keep taking care of yourself - the meetings are emotional, but worth every minute of it....  they will get better in time, and definitely a part of your healing process....

Tom

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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"

"What you think of me is none of my business"

"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"

 

 

 

 
abbyal


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We talk about detaching with love in this program , and when you can do that you will be showing your children that they are responsible for thier own actions , lying for thier father ,making excuses for his behavior and covering up thier mistakes is a lesson  I wish I had not taught my sons .. when we detach with love we do so with respect not anger also showing sons that every one deserves respect but they will learn how to set boundaries on how they will be treated by watching thier mom .. our detachment pamphlet is like a little instruction booklet on what my part in any relationship is ,pick one up next meeting thier dirt cheap i bought a bunch and had them in every purse and drawer in the house  hehe.. i always have one in my purse their a quick fix and reminder of what to do and what not to do for me .. hope you go back to another meeting , detaching takes time and alot of practice and I think you will find it  is one of the hardest things for all of us . we are after all fixers , problem is we take awhile to understand that we cannot fix anyone but ourselves.

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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Went to my 1st f2f meeting Saturday