The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I find myself in the position over the last couple of weeks wondering if I have been showing up for life on a regular basis. Am I doing anything more than the bare minimums to get through each day? Is there something more I should or could be doing? Am I right where I am supposed to be?
Being out of work since early May has made me accutely aware of the fact that I need to have somewhere to go each day, be around people, and something to do. I need the structure of it. The summer months were not so bad as I had my kids to keep me occupied and my place at beach. Now that the kids are back to school and I have all this time on my hands I just dont know what to do with myself. Each day just slides away without me doing a whole heck of a lot. I start each day with the best of intentions then I find all that I do is spend a lot of time sitting around watching tv. I have plenty to do but no motivation and plenty of excuses.
I have spent the past few weeks going from anger, guilt, berating myself, etc. I am putting a whole lot of pressure on myself and I am miserable I do not live up to it. I know what the solutions are but the fire apparently hasn't gotten hot enough for me to get off my behind. For now the best I can do is admit what is going on and I cant do anything more as I just dont have it in me. Maybe tomorrow will be better - maybe not but the one thing I know through all of this is that I trust my HP and I know that the will of God will never take me where the hand of God cannot protect me.
Karen
__________________
Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Love you all!
Karen
I hear you. I know when I was in that place the "Just for Today" Bookmark really helped me to find a center and direction each day.
I loved the parts that reminded me to ;
JUST FOR TODAY I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do - just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it. JUST FOR TODAY I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won't find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself. JUST FOR TODAY I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision. JUST FOR TODAY I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life.It helps
HP is with us each day Just keep showing up
-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 6th of October 2010 07:58:20 PM
