The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Why is it that I have such a hard time saying no? I have decided to try to not be so quick to say yes to everything, yes I'll run the fall mum sale, yes I'll do Community Day yes I'll run the fundraiser event...what is my problem! My ah is spending the last month of his 2nd jail term for his 4th dui, and I've said no to visiting him tho. No that I'm not writing any letters this time. No that I'm not putting money on his books there. For some reason it was easy to say no to those things. Maybe because the last time time I was so hopeful that jail time would make him realize what he has and appreciate his wonderful family. Alcoholism is a horrible disease, I hate it, not my husband. I'm not hopeful, but then again I'm not feeling hopeless about our future either. I feel blessed that I am healthy, my kids are healthy and it was a beautiful fall day. I love the saying, "I will make this day a happy one, for I alone can determine what kind of day it will be."
Alcoholism is a horrible disease, I hate it, not my husband. I'm not hopeful, but then again I'm not feeling hopeless about our future either. I feel blessed that I am healthy, my kids are healthy and it was a beautiful fall day. I love the saying, "I will make this day a happy one, for I alone can determine what kind of day it will be."
Dear Suzip
Thank you for your inspiring share. I too had a difficult time saying no, until I came into program and learned how to "Take Care of Me".
The old tools I had been given as a child told me to take care of everyone else and that it was selfish to think about me. That was why I had a hard time saying "NO"
Alanon told me to Focus on Myself, take care of my needs and then I could effectively care for others. This has made a huge difference in all my relations.
I find I am happier and so is all my relationships. When I say yes to something now I really mean it and it is not a chore
Aloha Suzip...great post and good recovery work on your part. I first learned to say no with the urgency of anger, resentment, confusion and the like behind it and that was good because no matter what impressed me to practice saying no it was practice and today I now can say no after consulting my experiences and value systems and my desires and availability. I still say yes often but rarely when I am out of balance.
I am learning to focus on me... ME. I don't know who me is, but I am working on that for now... re-direct my thoughts to me at all times. To thine own self be true. Take care of you :)
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You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. -Buddha
The past has flown away. The coming month and year do not exsist. Ours only is the present's tiny point. -Mahmud Shabistanri
