The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
So today, I think my lesson for myself is learning to take it one day at a time. AH has his weekly curling game to go to and usually he comes home drunk from this. Since we had our big talk a week ago, things were good and in the past couple of days he has come home after having a couple to last night I know he had a couple more than that, to tonight, I know he got started before having to go curling, so if history repeats it self and I have gotten to know his patterns of destruction, he will come home barely able to walk tonight after curling. My usual patterns are to beg and plead with him to not drink and if he does, please don't drink and drive. I have recently decided to stop begging, pleading, nagging etc. He is an adult he knows he shouldn't drink, he knows he shouldn't drink and drive, he also knows what the long term consequence will be if his behaviour doesn't change. So tonight as he was getting ready to go to his curling game I was very solemn, I held my tounge, I didn't beg, plead, nag, yell, etc... So just for today, I will let him follow his own journey and stay on the course of my own journey. I will accept that his journey may not be the same journey as mine. So just for today, I will not stay up and wait for him to see how drunk he is when he comes though the door(although I may sleep with one eye open, as hard habits die hard) and just for today I will not obsess with whether or not he drinks and drives. Even though this is so freaken hard and tomorrow is a new day I will face what ever I have to face tomorrow. I am glad that I have found this forumn and that there are so many wonderful people here that have been and are in the same or similar place as me. I have been reading many of the posts over the past several days and it has brought such a comfort to me. I am seeing that the pain and confusion that is my life right now will one day be replaced with a much happier, healthier, balance state of being.
So just for today, I will let him follow his own journey and stay on the course of my own journey. I will accept that his journey may not be the same journey as mine.
Those are incredibly powerful statements -- way to go!!
Thanks for the reminder of the choices that we can make for our own serenity.
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Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could... Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. - Emerson
Congratulations! You're off to a good start. Yes, it IS hard. But it gets easier with practice. ¨ I am seeing that the pain and confusion that is my life right now will one day be replaced with a much happier, healthier, balance state of being.¨ It's true, this program works. Keep coming back.
