The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Someone broke out the windows in my basement, climbed in, and stole all of the copper pipes in my basement to sell to a scrap metal place to have some money to buy drugs. When I called the police they told me that it is a common crime now, addicts are so desperate to get some money to buy drugs with the bad economy. With things hard for everyone, it is harder for most drug addicts to come by cash for their habit from financially strapped relatives.
It was very scary for me, the police entered my home with guns drawn, they told me sometimes after robbing a home of the copper pipes they will squat there, with the windows busted out and the home easily entered. Thank goodness they had stolen my copper and left.
It is my "old" home, a duplex that I was using half for storage and half for renting out. The side I was using for storage used to be my home, and I had tons of nice stuff there. The other side had just become vacant and I had fixed it all up for the next tenant, they broke in there and stole EVERYTHING that was not nailed down! They stole the copper pipes and heat registers from each floor, not just the basement. They also stole all of the screens for the aluminum.
In my side, I had so much stuff there they could not reach all of the walls, so they just stole half of the pipes.
I have a suspect, a neighbor whom I suspect is a crack or meth addict since his face looks so strange and messed up. I made the mistake of treating him like a human being, and when he approached me and asked me if I could hire him to help me clean up the rental unit, I said OK. I thought that maybe him wanting to work for some money meant that maybe he was in some sort of recovery program. HAH! That just goes to show how much I know about addicts, and you think I would have learned by now.
I will NEVER make that mistake again!!! He only wanted in that unit to see what was there to steal for later, he wanted to see if I still had the old copper pipes in there. He did an awful job cleaning so when he asked me if he could paint I said no, that I would do it. He got upset and evidentally, this is his revenge. I think that is why he did not take any of my stuff, he didn't want to break the law too badly since he probably knows I would suspect him. Insurance will cover the pipes being fixed, but would not have cover my stuff being stolen.
Ironically, my husband, the A told me not to give him the time of day, that he was probably a crackhead and to not have anything to do with him. Me and my "treat everyone like a person with kindness" stupidity! How I wished I would have listened to him and not hired him to clean out the unit. And I even gave him a bonus of an extra 20 bucks when he told me he had a family, thinking he was going to use the money to buy some holiday gifts for his daughter. I am just so angry at myself for treating a dangerous crackhead like a real regular person, what an idiot I am!!!!
The only silver lining in all of this is finding out who your friends are in times of trouble. One friend went and checked out the place to make sure no one else had broken in there and boarded up the windows for me so I would feel safe going in there and getting my stuff out. Another friend is letting me store stuff I want to keep in her garage temporarily while I arrange for long term storage so I can just wash my hands of that place and put it on the market.
I don't care how much it sells for, I just want to pay off the mortgage and get rid of it and never have to go there again.
I have barely slept since this happened, I am so afraid I had stuff there with my address to my home now and they will break in here. My husband keeps telling me that won't happen, I now live in my old neighborhood I grew up in and it is a very nice one, friends who visit say it reminds them of Mayberry RFD, LOL. No one even throws a candy wrapper in my lawn, and during snowstorms my neighbors shovel my driveway so my husband can come home from work and pull in the driveway. It costs us an arm and a leg to live here, no crackhead could ever afford it, but it is worth all of the struggle to feel safe...or as safe as I can feel after this happened.
It is tapping into so much anger that I have harbored towards my A and his addiction issues! At least he is a very high functioning A and works and doesn't steal or break the law. People often wonder what is the difference between an Alcoholic and street drug addict, well that is pretty much it. An alcoholic can still function for the most part and work and deal with life, that is why there are so many "high functioning alcoholics". I have never heard of a high functioning meth head or crackhead. They quickly crash and burn. And when they burn, they simply try to take as many people down with them as they can.
I just don't know what our society is going to do with so many hardened criminal addicts who wreck havoc in society with their breaking and entering, robbery, vandalism and so on, with no remorse. At least the meth/crack head who broke into my home was such a hardened criminal he knew how to turn the gas and water off before he stole the pipes so my house did not blow up or I had a flood in there. I know he did it for his own purposes, so he wasn't overcome by gas, or frozen trying to run away in the cold with wet shoes and clothes, but I know it would have been a lot worse had he been a beginner thug and just ripped out the pipes without turning stuff off.
I have heard that having your house broken into and your things stolen is like being raped emotionally and I see now that it is true. When I go to the house to work now I can't go alone, a friend has to come with me and still I am trembling as I turn the key in the door. I feel like throwing up when I turn down the street. I wonder if they ever can think or act like a human being and think about what they do to others.
Even in my own house I cannot sleep, now worried that they will follow me home or something and break into here. I almost do not want anything that was there anymore, knowing that they possible touched it and rummaged through it. It is like it is contaminated.
Ironically, it is my husband, the horrible A, who is helping me through this, he keeps saying that no one is going to break into our home with him here, that is why we live here even though he has to break his back to afford it. He wants to know we are safe when he is away at work for his long hours. Our house has no back door, and he keeps telling me that is why he bought it, less entrances to worry about people breaking into.
I am struggling not to have some really bad thoughts about that crack/meth head, like too bad that he was not squatting in there and the police could have found him and shot him, then there would be one less criminal addict wrecking havoc in our society and wounding and victimizing innocent law abiding tax paying hard working citizens.
I am glad that I was in alanon when this happened, so I can keep struggling to not give in to those mean thoughts. I will keep trying to think it is possible even he may get help one day, get clean and sober, and regret what he did to me.
Thanks for listening, and I ask for your prayers to once again be able to sleep...
Yikes... sorry to hear about this, as there aren't too many situations in life where one can feel more violated. I hope you don't beat yourself up too much about trying to be nice, & hopeful, and giving the addict a chance..... Yes, it looks like that didn't turn out, but you did it with the right intentions...
Take care Tom
__________________
"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
So sorry this happened! If you tell the police about the man you suspect, they may search his place and get your stuff back. That would be another step toward hitting bottom for him too.
while my ex didn't break into people's houses, he was definitely one who stole and stole and stole again to buy drugs. He always justified it in some way, someone owed him and didn't pay.
That was the bottom for him. I pray it will be for the person who violated you.
I hope you can regroup. I had some money stolen early this year (August) I have still not received a replacement for it. I know it does not come easily to regroup.
Aloha Mary P...That's how it affected me too!! When I got fearful I got really angry and rageful. Thank HP that I also had friends and family to support me thru it. My stealer robber went right thru the front door which was locked...peeled the door handle and stripped the lock system open...grrrrrrr!! Who could have ever told that they would find value in your plumbing? This certainly is a program practice event. In support (((((hugs)))))
We can call it the disease. And, I am one who beleives it is a disease. I also wish the disease only affected them, and not the innocent, caring people like yourself who are hurt and taken advantage of in this manner. But, I feel this was more than the disease raising its ugly head. What we have here is a character flaw that was present long before your pipes came up missing. I accept the disease but have no use for a person of this nature.
YIKES!!! Is my first response too---Thank goodness you didn't get hurt---This happened to my dear cousin--she fixed up her little place to rent out, and some creeps broke in and stole the pipes, wiring and anything that was not glued to the place---Druggies, I would bet---I am just grateful that ins. covered the damage and she was not there to be harmed---
I know what you mean by not wanting to help anyone anymore out of fear of being a victim---I used to help people a lot more than I do now---I am so very careful and wary---It makes me sad that between the economy bringing out the bad in bad people and some people who normally would be good, doing robberies out of desperation, I just cannot help anyone I don't know---I came upon a wreck a couple of weeks ago and kept my distance as I called 911 for them on my cell---It is just too risky anymore--I don't even go out after dark--I do my shopping and errands by day and lock my car doors and watch as I pull out of my garage and watch again as I return---Any creepy people hanging around we neighbors all watch out for each other and we are not slow to call the police----
So sorry this happened to you
__________________
Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!!
