The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Boyfriend and I broke up, it's over for good he says... no explanation. One day he loved me with all his heart and two days later he didn't love me anymore - or so he says. So I'm trying to right myself again, realize that I leaned too hard on a rotten post and fell down again. I'm still brushing myself off. Gotta stop trying to figure out how to fix the post, it just is what it is. I'm completely heartbroken and trying to get some insight into the error of my ways and what I need to change to keep this from happening again.
On a positive note, my daughter is back in the house, we talked yesterday at the juvenile justice meeting and are getting along a little better. Now if I can just get her and her sister to get along. I opted for the intensive family counseling where I meet with them three times a week again instead of wilderness camp. Hopefully something sticks this time.
Through all of this I realize life goes on, but it's just kind of crummy right now. I'm sure this too will pass - eventually.
Sending you love and comfort, I'm so sorry to hear that. There is no pain quite like that of heartbreak. The most painful situations have deep lessons in them, lessons that we have to learn before we can move on. Please be gentle on yourself and take care. Can you call your sponser or get to a f2f? its times like this you need all the support you can get.
As you say on a more positive note your daughter is back with you, that must be a comfort, I hope all things get a little easier for you both.
I know the feeling, I'm a week past a breakup with my abusive Alcoholic boyfriend. It hurts like hell and you will go back and forth, but just as I today finally am starting to see the truth, so will you.
I have reciently been there myself.... and I love your rotten post comparison. Even though I can't bring myself to consider her rotten... I still fell over and it still applies. *smile*
I always try to remember an old mustang I tried to buy when I first graduated high school. It was a basket case, but I wanted it so bad... it was going to be the coolest car on the planet.
I ended up not able to get it...and I was devistated. My great-grandmother passed away not long after that and left me her Chevelle.... we were meant for each other. *smile*
Take care of you... You deserve it, definitely his loss!
- ron
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"Good judgement comes from experience... experience comes from bad judgement" - unknown
Not that he's rotten, he was a great guy just that he looked good on the outside but was not whole on the inside... I miss him, my friends are all moving away, my daughter is driving me insane already and I feel so frayed that I want to run screaming and not look back.
I am so grateful I hit my codependent bottom ten years ago when the ex-fiance walked out on us. My youngest daughter was 11 at the time. I made a firm commitment to self to begin truly working on my codependency issues, and I was able to become a fully present mother to that daughter. Until then, my focus was always on the relationship, and my parenting came in second.
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"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience." - Woodrow Wilson
I don't doubt your boyfriend is acting out his own dysfunctional background. He has a lot going on at home. I think its easier to break up with you than deal with his baggage.
I think you have been remarkably honest during this whole venture which says a lot about your commitment to getting better.
I am so glad you are working on things with your daughter. You really have a lot on your plate and have to deal with hit all alone.
I'm glad you have this room to come to so that you can get feedback and compassion.
