The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well, I just wanted to say helllo to all the al-anon members, i have been one for a few years though havent posted in a long time, much has happened since my last post, My A has been on and off the wagon, he made it 16 months, since then he has struggled to get back to where he was. I have learned a lot in the past few years, detaching with love has been the hardest thing for me. My A doesnt get much positive support from his family. which makes it so much more difficult for him, but I have always tried to be there and be supportive. the stress from the last year has me feeling drained, stress from life in general, the economy,etc , but I know my inner strength will get me through, i am not a weak person, life taught me that, and so i take things a day at a time, and try to remeber to hold my head up and smile, even when things get rough. I am sorry i wasn't posting before now, I guess i needed the courage to write again, my A is sober now, again , he startes over, he had it in his mind that , his PLAN was to only drink once a month, we know that doesn't work for long and eventually he will slip and regress. I spoke to him after the last slip, and came right out and told him, if you drink again, we are done. I cant go through the worry and stress anymore, life itsself is enough stress for anyone in this day and age. And it was the hardest thing i ever had to say to him. I feel like if i did leave him, he would have no one for support, he grew up with such negativity, and mental abuse. I guess i am afraid he would end up seriously hurt or dead, i know his family would turn their back on him, and GOD only knows what would happen afterwards. I pray for his sobriety, and hope, he will in time reach the point he was at before. Well I hope my letter finds all of you alright,
Welcome back. There is no right or wrong time to post. I sure hope you are attending meetings for yourself. As hard as it is, you can't worry about what he's going to do if you leave him. You have to turn him over to his HP and go from there. Several years ago when I told my Tim he had to go, I couldn't worry about what would be next for him. I had to take care of me and do what was best for me. It didn't mean that I stopped loving him. It mean that I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't live in the chaos. He too was an abused child, and was also abused by his first wife. An addict is gonna do what an addict is gonna do, sober or not. There's nothing you can about it. The BEST thing you can do is to get back to face to face meetings and take care of you. That's how you help him but more importantly YOU. Please keep coming back. Love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
