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Well yesterday my a didn't drink which was very good. I didn't do the baby test but my hormons are very high and very easly angered. I haven't lose my tempter and got voliet to him. But in the past I have cut my arm, well I just make marks with a knife and the blood comes out, well that is what I did yesterday I have a bunch of knife marks on my right arm. They are not deep and they will problary just leave a scare. I think with my moving to a new place and leaving this place I am leaving in right now is starting to get to me. This weekend is wehn they are going to be moving the furtniue so I won't have a bed if I decided to stay here. So I guess I am going to have to go. I don't know why I am fighting it but i am. The neighbor that I am moving into is very nice so I don't know what the problem is. I guess the not knowing of how it is going to be and what it is it going to be like.
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
((((NY)))) cutting yourself is very serious, and I hope for your own safety that you have spoken to your doctor about this, there is help available. Going to the doctor is a form of self care, one of the topics we stress here in Alanon for recovery. Take care of "yourself"...gardengal
I did a search for "cutting onself" in google as I had never heard of such a thing.
here is the first respose I got with some links that might be helpful to you.
take care of yourself...
I'm a 21-year-old male. In the past few months I've started cutting and scratching the inside of my calves with a razor when I get depressed (nothing really deep, just enough so that it bleeds). I don't know what made me start, but I always feel much better afterwards. I've heard that only suicidal people do things like this. I don't consider myself suicidal by any means. Just because I occasionally cut myself, does it mean I'm suicidal?
A. When people cut or otherwise injure themselves (self-injurious behavior or SIB), it may stem from many different reasons. Not all such individuals are suicidal, as you correctly suspect. However, SIB is a risk factor for eventual suicidal behavior, and definitely deserves professional evaluation NOW!
You say that you feel much better after cutting yourself, and this effect is sometimes reported in those who engage in SIB. For some, the act of cutting or scratching may relieve tension, or serve as a kind of release valve for repressed anger. For others, SIB relieves some type of inner urge or compulsion.
SIB probably does not indicate a wish to die, in the majority of cases--but it may be a kind of cry for help. After all, you are writing to me. You must have some reasons for not wanting to keep this to yourself...what might those reasons be? You say that you cut yourself "...when I get depressed...". To me, this suggests you may be trying to self-manage a potentially serious mood disorder. There are far more constructive ways to deal with depression, and again, I would urge you to get professional help right away.
You may also want to contact your local chapter of the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (<http://www.dbsalliance.org> or call 800-826-3632); they can often provide helpful suggestions for dealing with the feelings you are now handling by cutting or scratching. The book, "Feeling Good", by Dr. David Burns, may also be of help to you--but it is not a substitute for professional help.
If you need a referral, try calling the Alliance, or ask your family doctor. Please don't keep this all to yourself!
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Megan
If you want things you never had you need to do things you have never done
I am not real recovered and came back to alanon recently after being away for a couple of years. I used to cut myself when i was a teenager i did it three times with a razor blade and when it healed i did it again. My parents didnt notice and i think that was the reason i did it. I am not a pro about this but i used to have a friend that cut herself often. I am writing here to tell you that you are not alone. I hope you get help for this its not as bad as you think with the proper therapy. Its like anything else kind of an addiction takes focus off emotional pain. You are not the only one that does this unfortuneately. There is help out there for this and it doesnt make you a bad person. I hope you know that, next time if you have an urge to cut yourself come to the alanon room or call a friend and just talk to them, until you get to your appointment. You are not alone in this. We are here for you .. Hope this helps a bit
kerry
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Life can only be understood backwards, But it must be lived forwards
Please realize that you just did the first step in helping yourself with cutting by admitting it and bringing it out into the open. This must have been very scarry for you to admit this as I know several cutters personally. The next step they have done is to seek a therapist that is familiar with this condition. There is help out there. One friend finally saw her family doctor and he told her to just stop it! That didn't help at all and only made her feel embarassed and ashamed. When or if you make an appointment probably with a psychologist or psychiatrist they should understand and be able to give you the help you so deserve. Give yourself alot of credit for telling us here about this! That is your first step in overcoming this condition.
Lots of supportive and loving hugs sent to you! cdb
I have had the opportunity to meet two individuals in Alanon. Cutting themselves became their obsession in response to the alcoholism (anger). The alcoholics obsession is alcohol and those of us who live with the disease usually pick up our own obsession or compulsive behavior. It is serious, and hope you get going. There is a payoff in such behavior. In an odd sort of way, even though it causes pain, it is familiar, and because it is familiar it is comforting (comforting meaning it is how you deal w/ your anger or perhaps lack of control).
Hope you seek Help Soon! Alcholism is not your fault.
I'm glad you could come out with this. I have often abused myself in other ways and I guess this is related . I used to go get beat up by a deranged disbarred karate instructor. I really thought if I hurt myself enough I would get better once I got all I "deserved"
Is this anything like what your thinking? Maybe its not at all and I apologize. Whatever :) inflicting ourselves with pain is not what I learned in Alanon :) They told me when I feel bad about myself I should do the opposite and do something nice for myself instead. I said "like what?" Lady told me I like to go buy myself a tube of lipstick. I'm a guy but I knew what she meant. I never did anything nice for myself.
LOL I started with a pair of new socks :) Look ma ...no holes:)