The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Went to the Boy Scouts awards ceremony and planning meeting last night. I painfully sat through the whole thing with my preschooler on my lap and my daughter beside me. I volunteered my AH for two fundraising activities (that he has done in the past) and I volunteered myself for, get this, NOTHING! I didn't let the guilt get me and just kept my focus on what I need, which right now, is to focus on all of my kids. I'm so proud of me.
Lou
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Every new day begins with new possibilities. It's up to us to fill it with the things that move us toward progress and peace. ~ Ronald Reagan~
Sometimes what you want to do has to fail, so you won't ~Marguerite Bro~
I still have a ard time not taking on too much, but I'm learning to say "I'll think about it and get back to you". That way I don't allow myself to be put on the spot.
Good going.
In recovery,
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~Jen~
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown
Lou was that guilt about you saying NO or about voluteening your alcoholic out side of his own decision. That's a form of power and control and something I stopped doing in order to let others form and make their own decisions and then follow thru on before and after. For practice I would undo that and let the alcoholic know that the scouts need voluteers he might call and find out.
Because he has done this in the past is not a justification.
Okay, in my defense (and yes, it sounds like I need one), every family had to be on the activity list and the meeting wouldn't end until every slot was filled. My AH couldn't be at the meeting because he had to be at one of his recovery classes. I really only volunteered him for one thing, Christmas Tree Pick-Up, a very low-key activity that he has done for the past 9 years. If he didn't do his same ol same ol, I would have been stuck with organizng a dinner or something. The other fundraiser I just agreed to, because it was assumed he was doing it again since he does it multiple times a year for various organizations, and always scouts. Honest, I really wasn't being controlling or manipulative; and he is passionate enough about scouts that his feelings would be hurt if he wasn't included. If I really wanted to get him, I would have signed him up to arrange the snow camping trip!
Blessings, Lou
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Every new day begins with new possibilities. It's up to us to fill it with the things that move us toward progress and peace. ~ Ronald Reagan~
Sometimes what you want to do has to fail, so you won't ~Marguerite Bro~
I figured I'd some humor to this situation. It's certainly not the "alanon" way.
I have had a lot of involvement with boards and committees and the one golden rule that everyone seems to know on these boards and committees is NEVER MISS A MEETING because it's then when you get appointed/elected/ volunteered. Someone seconds the motion and it's a done deal. Of course you can always say no afterwards but more often than not, people don't.
So I guess your hubby perhaps should have attended
Hope you find the humor in this, Maria
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
