The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I find myself asking that question a lot lately. With bills, mortgage, responsiblites, kids, the things I do to self destruct-things to make myself feel better which only make me feel worse, stressful job, attempts to make friends and relationships, taking care of an elderly grandmother, feeling bad about the things I do and say, the constant anxiety and insecurity sometimes I just feel so OVERWHELMED!!!! Thanks for letting me vent.
God Grant me Serenity. God Grant me forgiveness for the ways I hurt myself when I know better. Forgive me for the way I hurt and jeopardize the well being of those I love the most and even strangers. Forgive me for committing the same sins over and over and over again. Grant me mercy. Forgive me for disobedience. Forgive me for putting someone else and even substances and the approval of others about You and my serenity. Give me wisdom, strength, mercy, and peace. Let your will be done in my life and in the life of ALL I love,
Sometimes just being able to vent in a forum such as this is better therapy than shelling out hundreds, if not thousands of dollars to 'professionals' in the world outside of program. I have often had to just vent like that to total strangers, just to see the look on their faces. I've gotten mixed responses. LOL
And the flip side of it being a good thing to vent is: the rest of us that need to hear that we are not alone in stress and other things that make us feel worthless to ourselves. Thanks for sharing!
Yes, at times it does seem too hard. I start asking myself why bother or it doesn't matter........ Then somehow I start the search for joy like going outside and seeing how big the sky is...... there is definately something bigger and more powerful than me and all my stuff.
Taking one day and trying to look forward to what HP has in store to bolster me through the day. At night, I try to think of three things I'm glad I got done, three things I have gratitude for and three things that brought me joy. I am reading an Al Anon book called Opening Our Hearts, Transforming Our Losses. It has helped me to look at things in a different way and to find more joy and hope. Maybe you would like this book too.
Just wanted to share that yes, I for sure feel like this is the hardest thing I have every done so I have hope that the rewards or changes will be even sweeter. Keep coming back.
hugs, ddub
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"Choices are the hinges of destiny." Pythagoras You can't change the past, but you can change the future.
