I wanted to say thanks to everyone for encouraging me to go to a face to face Al-Anon meeting.  I went this morning.  They said I should try to attend 6 meetings in 6 days.  I'm not sure where to find one tomorrow, but the place I chose has them every week night, as well as on Saturday.  Also, I was told by many people there that this was one of the best in our area.  So I'm glad I chose to go to that one.  I was not sure I would be in the right place, but I later felt confident that I made a good choice.

It was awfully scary, at first, walking through the doors.  I realized several minutes into it that I chose a chair right inside the door (not like me, normally), and had one leg on the chair and one leg off the side.  I guess I was ready to bolt at a moment's notice!  A few people showed up a bit late, and I recognized two of them.  One was someone I used to know in church.  We had gone on a women's retreat together about 13 years ago.  She remembered me, too; and she spoke with me after the meeting.  The other I recognized also remembered me.  She was my OB/GYN when I was pregnant with my second child, also 13 years ago (he will be 13 in August).

Both of these women had been positive support for me back then, as my husband left when I was 3 months pregnant.  I had that child on my own, alone.

What an amazing experience today was for me!  Between the many, many, many things I heard that I needed to hear and reacquainting with these two women, I could not have asked for a better day or better experience.

I also contacted my A to let him know I would like to talk, when he is ready.  He said today was not a good day for him, but he loves me.  I'm very nervous, and I still don't know if we will work things out or not; but I feel better about the idea that I will be okay, regardless of the outcome.