I am really trying to use the tool of getting busy to get me through this time of transition. So far I have the following in hand:

1. On Saturday a class to go to on some things I need (its free)
2. Meeting a friend on the weekend (I am very very isolated)
3. meeting list for the weekend (I have promised myself I will go to at least 2 meetings!
4. Kept my tiny abode clean and tiny, kept up with what I need to do (I can fall behind on this in a instant).
5. Kept on applying for jobs regardless. Trying to set limits on my fear.
6. Made a doctors appointment for a week or so ahead.  I really need so much medical attention. I simply can't put it off anymore.


I am in deep fear about the future, keeping a job, having a job, having an income so I am putting out a lot of resumes and being very very proactive in my search.

I am working super hard to detach from my housemates. I think that for me means all of them since they are all so overinvolved with each other. I really work hard on not even   having a reaction around them. That is sometimes so so difficult. I also work pretty hard on being vague around them. They gossip, make up stuff about everyone!
I am a bit sad because one of the roommates has been a resource for me but she is so overinvolved with everyone I am putting myself at risk engaging.  I  know I was Ms. Overinvolved, resentment, martyr my entire life.  I find it contagious to be around someone physically who isn't in recovery who is acting out over another's addiction.

I'm being willing.

Maresie.