I`d love to, but...

1. I have to floss my cat.
2. I`ve dedicated my life to linguini.
3. I want to spend more time with my blender.
4. The President said he might drop in.
5. The man on television told me to say tuned.
6. I`ve been scheduled for a karma transplant.
7. I`m staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.
8. It`s my parakeet`s bowling night.
9. It wouldn`t be fair to the other Beautiful People.
10. I`m building a pig from a kit.
11. I did my own thing and now I`ve got to undo it.
12. I`m enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.
13. There`s a disturbance in the Force.
14. I`m doing door-to-door collecting for static cling.
15. I have to go to the post office to see if I`m still wanted.
16. I`m teaching my ferret to yodel.
17. I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products.
18. I`m going through cherry cheesecake withdrawl.
19. I`m planning to go downtown to try on gloves.
20. My crayons all melted together.
21. I`m trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.
22. I`m in training to be a household pest.
23. I`m getting my overalls overhauled.
24. My patent is pending.
25. I`m attending the opening of my garage door.
26. I`m sandblasting my oven.
27. I`m worried about my vertical hold.
28. I`m going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise.
29. I`m being deported.
30. The grunion are running.
31. I`ll be looking for a parking space.
32. My Millard Filmore Fan Club meets then.
33. The monsters haven`t turned blue yet, and I have to eat more dots.
34. I`m taking punk totem pole carving.
35. I have to fluff my shower cap.
36. I`m converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.
37. I`ve come down with a really horrible case of something or other.
38. I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.
39. My plot to take over the world is thickening.
40. I have to fulfill my potential.
41. I don`t want to leave my comfort zone.
42. It`s too close to the turn of the century.
43. I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary.
44. My subconscious says no.
45. I`m giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.
46. I left my body in my other clothes.
47. The last time I went, I never came back.
48. I`ve got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.
49. I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.
50. None of my socks match.
51. I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.
52. I`m having all my plants neutered.
53. People are blaming me for the Spanish-American War.
54. I changed the lock on my door and now I can`t get out.
55. I`m making a home movie called "The Thing That Grew in My Refrigerator."
56. I`m attending a perfume convention as guest sniffer.
57. My yucca plant is feeling yucky.
58. I`m touring China with a wok band.
59. My chocolate-appreciation class meets that night.
60. I never go out on days that end in "Y."
61. My mother would never let me hear the end of it.
62. I`m running off to Yugoslavia with a foreign-exchange student named Basil Metabolism.
63. I just picked up a book called "Glue in Many Lands" and I can`t put it down.
64. I`m too old/young for that stuff.
65. I have to wash/condition/perm/curl/tease/torment my hair.
66. I have too much guilt.
67. There are important world issues that need worrying about.
68. I have to draw "Cubby" for an art scholarship.
69. I`m uncomfortable when I`m alone or with others.
70. I promised to help a friend fold road maps.
71. I feel a song coming on.
72. I`m trying to be less popular.
73. My bathroom tiles need grouting.
74. I have to bleach my hare.
75. I`m waiting to see if I`m already a winner.
76. I`m writing a love letter to Richard Simmons.
77. You know how we psychos are.
78. My favorite commercial is on TV.
79. I have to study for a blood test.
80. I`m going to be old someday.
81. I`ve been traded to Cincinnati.
82. I`m observing National Apathy Week.
83. I have to rotate my crops.
84. My uncle escaped again.
85. I`m up to my elbows in waxy buildup.
86. I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.
87. I`m having my baby shoes bronzed.
88. I have to go to court for kitty littering.
89. I`m going to count the bristles in my toothbrush.
90. I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.
91. Having fun gives me prickly heat.
92. I`m going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if anyone is looking for me.
93. I have to jog my memory.
94. My palm reader advised against it.
95. My Dress For Obscurity class meets then.
96. I have to stay home and see if I snore.
97. I prefer to remain an enigma.
98. I think you want the OTHER [your name] .
99. I have to sit up with a sick ant.
100. I`m trying to cut down.
101.... well, maybe.