The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I was wondering what the purpose of a sponsor is? Is it for when a crisis arises you have someone to talk to? Is it a commitment where you have to call every day or once a week? Please explain?
David62 had a great post on this a while back. Instead of trying to paraphrase, I copied it here. I am sure he won't mind. A long drive across Texas to come beat me up if he does. *grin*
Take care of you!
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Hi Family,
Someone asked a question about sponsorship. A program friend gave these to me a couple of years ago and I have posted this before but thought I would again! I hope they are useful.---------David
SPONSORSHIP -What It Is and What It Isn't
Four major points in sponsorship that most Twelve Step Fellowship members will agree on:
1.The primary responsibility of sponsors is to help their sponsees work the Twelve Steps.
2.A sponsor and sponsee have an obligation to discuss their mutual expectations, objectives, and requirements, if any, regarding the sponsorship relationship before they enter into that relationship.
3.A sponsor shares his or her experience, strength, and hope with his or her sponsee rather than trying to run the sponsee's life.
4.A sponsor must never take advantage of a sponsee in any way.
WHAT DOES A SPONSOR DO?
1.A sponsor's primary responsibility is to help a sponsee work the Twelve Steps by providing explanation, guidance, and encouragement.
2.A sponsor helps us get established quickly in our Fellowship by explaining basic concepts and terminology and by introducing us to other members.
3.A sponsor is a safe person who we can learn to trust.
4.A sponsor can answer the many questions that we have as newcomers or develop as "mid-timers."
5.A sponsor can help us in the process of self-examination that the Steps require.
6.A sponsor encourages us to read the basis text of our Fellowship and other program literature and to engage in Fellowship activities and service work.
7.A sponsor can monitor our progress, confront us when it is appropriate, and generally help us stay on the recovery path.
8.A sponsor reminds us to apply Twelve Step principles in our lives.
9.A sponsor models the Twelve Step program of recovery.
10. Our sponsor is available in times of crisis.
11. A sponsor provides practice in building relationships.
WHAT A SPONSOR DOES NOT DO
1.A sponsor cannot keep us in recovery.
2.A sponsor is not our therapist. The Twelve Steps are about spiritual growth, not therapy.
3.A sponsor should not attempt to control our lives or encourage an unhealthy dependence.
4.A sponsor should not take advantage of us or exploit us in any way.
FACTORS TO CONSIDER IN CHOOSING A SPONSOR
1.Has what we want.
2.Lives in the solution.
3.Walks the talk
4.Has a sponsor
5.Emphasizes the Steps
6.Has more time in recovery that we do
7.Has worked more Steps than we have
8.Is available for telephone calls and meetings
9.Emphasizes the spiritual aspect of the program
10. Gender is the same as ours
It is a privilege to sponsor someone. And it's one of the ways we stay in recovery.
-- Edited by david62 at 20:59, 2007-10-15
__________________
"Good judgement comes from experience... experience comes from bad judgement" - unknown
Imagine you are on a journey to a place you have never been. You don't know the language. You don't know the customs. You either fumble around and hope you get where you want to go, or you get a guide. That is what a sponsor is. Someone to guide you through this stage of your recovery. He/she knows the language and has been where you are.
It is up to you and your prospective sponsor to decide what you want/ need, how often you contact, etc. It's your recovery. It's up to you.
Hope this helps.
In recovery,
__________________
~Jen~
"When you come to the edge of all you know you must believe in one of two things... there will be earth on which to stand or you will be given wings." ~Unknown