The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
After a 7 year relationship which I invested my all into I'm left with some garden furniture that was left to me some clothes, two dogs, two cats and pretty much nothing else. The A had to have everything else. All the furniture went to his storage which I paid on for months. All the cars(there were two of them) were destroyed by him.
Now I'm left starting over in my 50 's with very little to draw on. I live in a house with a lot of dysfunctional people, some more dysfunctional than others. I know if one dysfunctional person moves out another will move in.
I have most of my stuff in storage in a tiny storage unit. There are days when I am on absolute overwhelm about where to start to begin to deal with stuff. I've tried paying down my credit cards (which largely financed my move) and I am really deeply in debt. I'm manging but barely.
I do manage to resist any impulse to help the A. He is living in a old car he got for the truck I broke my back to pay for. He trashed the truck got some money and paid off lots of his fines and doesn't have much. He has no remorse no sense of responsibility nothing. He wanted to take one of the dogs to live in the car with him but I refused.
His court case is still pending and I believe he may well go to jail which would mean the end of everything for him. I believe he may be able to store his tools somewhere. I am not offering.
I think I am going to be on one day at a time for a long long time.
Just focus on you. I know that's hard for a while but soon it will get easier and easier! You're getting better slowly but surely and soon everything will work out. I will hope for jail time with you!
you have come so far and done so much you are stronger and wiser than you were from the serenity prayers and experiences starting over could also mean a fresh start rest some and add TLC a bit daily just for you thinking of you a lot
hugs, ddub
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"Choices are the hinges of destiny." Pythagoras You can't change the past, but you can change the future.
I find that focusing on the moment in front of me helps so much more than thinking it will be a certain way for a long time.
Although I've been divorced from my A for a long time (and he's now since dead), I still struggle with a lot of financial issues and also have some chronic health problems that have finally forced me to apply for disability.
If nothing else, I make myself write a gratitude list when I am feeling particularly down and hopeless.
(((hugs)))
PS. I am an avid dog lover too, with 6 of my own, (and 7 cats) and they are one of the biggest joys in my life!
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"If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience." - Woodrow Wilson
