The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello everyone! Although I haven't posted in a really long time, I've been here often, mostly just reading.
I don't have any contact at all with my soon-to-be ex-AH. My divorce will be final in about 3 or 4 weeks.
He chose alcohol and cocaine over our life together. I left him in September. It was the hardest thing I ever did.
I've had 6 months to really think about and over-analyze my life. I've come to realize... I absolutely did the right thing!
The A lost his job, and as far as I know, is still unemployed, and getting unemployment benefits. He has done nothing to help himself with his addictions.
He's not been helping me pay any of our bills, and most of the debt is his. He is supposed to be paying me money each week to help out... and doesn't bother.
He's continuing on his path of destruction.
I'm actually enjoying my life now. I'm calmer. I sleep better. I'm taking way better care of myself.
I'm living with mom. My house is still for sale. I feel safe and secure here. It's home... for now. I'll be moving in about 6 months when my apartment is ready. By then I should be more financially stable... hopefully.
The final divorce judgment requires the A to pay me monthly alimony to repay some of the debt. I will believe it when I see the checks coming in. I'm not sure how well my state enforces alimony payments.
I keep hoping that maybe, just maybe... sometime in the future, the A will actually do the right thing and take responsibility. ...but I'm not holding my breath!
...Artygirl
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Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.
so glad you updated us. So glad you sound more serene. Am sad about your A. I was nervous when you were so depending on him for money. I know it is none of my business. Just my experience is they don't take responsibility.
You are so brave and have accomplished so much. It is not easy to walk away from your home and to be strong enough to cont. on your path.
