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Nobody's recovered...is that OK?
(Preview)
I am in-love with my A...as most of you are. I'm trying to live my own life, not paying attention to his disease....taking one day at a time...staying in therapy. But everyday, I face the challenge of feeling hope for his recovery instead of focusing on mine. I don't have to be with this man. I choose to be...
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kicky
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10
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785
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A New Day
(Preview)
I think I have finally got it. About a month or so ago I started working on Letting go and Letting God.....as hard as it has been to trust my HP I have worked especially hard on this, as it is easier to trust my HP to take care of things than for me to worry, worry, worry about my A and my life. This w...
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marmare
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5
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582
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10 guidelines
(Preview)
this was sent to me by a friend..i think it is wonderful..hope it helps some of you...hugs iona54
if necessary God of your understanding or Higher Power
TEN GUIDELINES FROM GOD. 1. QUIT WORRYING: Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sit an...
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iona54
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5
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679
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haxigonian XXVI
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I will have to make this quick as there is little time left.
I got a call today that upset me very much. Some of my cousins are trying to get me back into Kansas City and into "family" control. It's a typical tactic; financial and other types of bullying and shaming are included. W...
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haximon
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6
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663
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and the beat goes on
(Preview)
so he just called. Actually he called a few times before I actually answered. All about Tuesday. I asked if he feels that he really has enough time under his belt that he can give me what I want He says yes. A week does not a sober person make in my estimation. All I keep hea...
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Kim
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5
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634
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Regaining those lost feelings
(Preview)
Hello everyone. I had taken a lil' hiatus from the board....needed a bit of quiet time for myself. Still working my Program strong and surrounding myself f2f w/those who work Alanon.
For those who are married, how in the world to do you handle recovery and a relationship at the same time?
Lil'...
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sg
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14
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729
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Kick in the gut
(Preview)
Nobody promised being a mother would be easy did they. My 18 year old son who, for all of his life has walked away from situations where there is alcohol, told me that tonight he is going to a co-workers and he likely won't come home... "not gonna chance getting home, if you know what I mean"....
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bcanuck
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5
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719
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Another sign ???
(Preview)
Yesterday when I came home from work my husband was gone .. Out drinking I was sure of it. Both of my children has plans and so I went to another f2f. I came home around 9:30 and when I pulled up and turned off my lights I noticed my husband staggering around the yard. Then he pulled his pants down and urin...
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Tammy
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10
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720
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It's no "one time thing" kiddies.
(Preview)
This morning he was drunk before 11 a.m. Here we go again. I think I will make an appointment with an attorney. I don't see any other way. Sadly, Diva
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Diva
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16
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1587
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Why when the A has no home,hes sober?
(Preview)
Hi I'am a newbie, hope I can ask this question, with out going on & on, sometimes I want to shut myself up. We have been battling with my 28yr. old son about his pot use & his drinking, since he has been 13-14. The man who started him & many other kids in the neighborhood on the pot, was an Disable...
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Pegiscats
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4
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629
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October's Business Meeting Suggestion
(Preview)
Sponsors
I have an item for the next business meeting if I am unable to attend. Often newcomers are looking for online sponsors. I was wondering if after the scripts have run before we ask for topics if the Chair could ask by a show of hands "!" if anyone is willing to be a te...
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Maria123
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5
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621
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A new beginning ?
(Preview)
Last night I was moving while my husband was working ( he was not expected home until 8am this morning ). On the way back from the condo my cell phone rang and it was my house and you guessed it he was there. Wanting to know where we were and when we were coming home. My heart bega...
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Tammy
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10
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625
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kim
(Preview)
One day at a time. i know you hurt, every right too.
How old is your step daughter? If you guys are close, believe me she will want to see you.
Especially as her teenager from hell comes thru, her mom will love for you
to share this wonderful time! In fact the girl may be better for you than mom.
...
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debilyn
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3
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569
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haxigonian XXV
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
The Multnomah County library computers are down--again--so I'm at my coffeshop haunt on NW 23rd using prepaid net time.
I finally got to the Park Blocks farmer's market; the directions I got put me at the wrong end and I drew a tough walk to start the day. the Park Blocks are Por...
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haximon
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5
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649
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LONG step one questionaire
(Preview)
From Paths to Recovery Alanon Book revised for Coda we admitted we were powerless over others - that our lives had become unmanageable. #######ROSIE....i had to accept that LIFE was unmanageable in most respects...not just relationships, but LIFE
Do I accept...
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rosie light shines
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0
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636
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Has anyone heard how Isobel is doing?
(Preview)
Hi everyone, just wondering if anyone knows how Isobel is doing. thanks Jill
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Jill
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4
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677
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he still is not home and no phone call since 10:00 thursday night
(Preview)
i just checked the bank & he took out $60.00 yesterday but today he took out $440.00 tonight it doesnt tell me where he took it from. i searched all over for him today i am wiped and cant take this anymore he left me with no money i had to give my daughter change for lunch money & borrowed money...
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chrissy
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7
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727
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sad and confused
(Preview)
Hello roomies.
Tonight I had a wonderfdul night with my stepdaughter. We went to a movie and stayed up late watching TV. It's so nice to have her in her room and with me. At the same time it just breaks my heart. You see, I know that although I have a good relationship with her mother, things...
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Kim
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6
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708
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Been Away Too Long!!
(Preview)
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afmom03
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3
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643
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Hate is love frustrated
(Preview)
Hello,
I just wanted to thank everyone that responed to my post. I do love my A very much not sure that came across. One thing that was wrote back was Hate is Love Frustrated. Boy did I need that. I am Frustrated. My A is depressed and I can't help him. I'm so frust...
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nikkilou
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3
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698
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Need Alt. for next week
(Preview)
hi boys and girls.
I have to go into the hospital on Monday for catarac surgery. I need a fill in alt. for Monday and Tuesday morning meetings. If you can help out on one or both of those mornings, I really would appreciate it.
Please contact Senora Bob so she will know. Thanks alot for your help!!
da...
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dadrrb1
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3
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559
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Is he or isn't he?
(Preview)
Hi :)
This is my first time here, my first time "talking" about this. I feel like an idiot because I don't know. He says everyone drinks this much. My friends and I don't.
Sorry this is soooo long but I'm so happy to finally find someplace to ask. I don't even know where to start s...
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Looking4Peace
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8
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754
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letting go the need to *get even*
(Preview)
SEPTEMBER 16 >Revenge > >No matter how long we ve been recovering, no matter how >solid our spiritual ground, we may still feel an >overwhelming desire at times to punish, or get even, with >another person. > #####ROSIE...oh yeah, i have the tendency to be very vindi...
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rosie light shines
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0
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523
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I hate my A
(Preview)
Hi,
Some days I really hate my A. He is sober now almost a year but still very selfish. Now life is all about him getting sober. I really could care less about how hard it is. Like it was easy to live with an A. Does he think it is easy running the house, working, re...
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nikkilou
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7
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768
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He made up his mind
(Preview)
Hi all,
I posted perviously that my "A" had a posibility of going to Alaska and was just waiting on a phone call on Tuesday.
Well, I don't have to wait until Tuesday. My "A" had decided not to go! He stopped by my work and said that he was unable to find a reason to go besides the money, and that wasn't good...
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Dolphin123
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3
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579
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pinching pennies
(Preview)
does this sound strange to anyone else?
My A quit his job after leaving a rehab. His boss had been dealing to him at work and he said that he could not return and stay sober. I was supportive of this decision. Well, he gave up a 20 year career and a million dollars/year in sales to do what , I do not know. I a...
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confused
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3
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596
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Moving Day
(Preview)
This has really been a difficult week. I am really struggling to stay above water. I am confused, hurt, dissapointed, and yet my head is clear on what I have to do.
I have really been praying this week.. Praying for my God to show me the light. To make everything clear to me . To send me a sign.. Well... >
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Tammy
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5
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571
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be careful what you wish for
(Preview)
Hello all and many, many (((hugs)))) to you all!!!
I would like to thank you all for your wonderful words of support these past few days. My A called today during my work day (whic hi have asked him not to do) to ask me what I am doing "next week". He meant Tues. which is our three yea...
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Kim
|
7
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769
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haxigonian XXIV
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I've had my 30 day check-in with my caseworker. Lucky I had that list that i'd put up in here with me; she loved it. Now to focus on job search. Only remaining hurdle is vocational rehab on 20th.
I'd almost forgot...chiropractor requires fitness tests...
standup/sitdown 51 reps u...
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haximon
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2
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622
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Thank you all for your kind responses.
(Preview)
This morning when my A awoke, the first thing he did was apologize. Haven't we all heard that?????? He had not been attending his meetings lately, and I know that sooner or later when he doesn't attend, he is going to slip. OK I forgave him. I do love this wonderful man with all my heart. He is kind, good, fu...
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Diva
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4
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600
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Tammy
(Preview)
Hey there
Just wondering how you are doing-last time you posted you were leaving your husband. I was just hoping you were ok, as ok as you can be at a time like this. Please post if you have the time and resources.
Love Julie D.
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browneyes
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4
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710
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Can't Stand it.
(Preview)
I am new here and don't even know where to start, all I know is my husbands drinking is making my life miserable, I don't even know if I love him anymore the man I fell in love with is gone, he is always too drunk to carry on a conversation, at this point I feel more like his mother. People think I am pathetic for...
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Anttay
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3
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584
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Pity Party
(Preview)
I do not sleep with my husband. He is awake all night a lot and when he does sleep it is so restless, I get woken up. Or he snores so loud the walls shake.
I cannot talk to my husband. He either does not remember things I tell him or he remembers the stuff in his twisted way.&nbs...
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browneyes
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4
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533
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My Crazy Life
(Preview)
Hello All,
Sorry I have been absent this week, but I know you all understand the insanity that we live in.
My 6 year old started school for the first time ever, 1st grade. So now we have homework, lunch to pack, open house, and a little more drama to add to our lives. This is also very exciting, because t...
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Dolphin123
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2
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593
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I failed.....it's all over now
(Preview)
When my alcoholic husband walked out on me, i felt like i had lost it all. My step-daughters were gone and my son and I had to adjust to going from a family of 5 to just us. The only thing i had left to work for was my son and our home. Outside of that, I was empty. For years, I have stru...
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Mandi
|
6
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849
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Thursday
(Preview)
This is day seven of no fighting, arguing, or silence. I told my A last night that it is scary to me that he has come home every night after work and that I am so cautious that the other shoe will drop at any second. He jokingly said that it could and then said no, I want it to be "this way" between u...
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marmare
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3
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545
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HE BLEW IT AGAIN
(Preview)
HE WENT TO AA FOR 3WKS DIDNT DRINK. TODAY HIS BOSS CALLED IN SICK AND HE WAS STRESSED SAID HE WAS WORKING LATE.HE WAS GOING TO GO TO THE STORE AND PICK UP SALAD WHEN I SPOKE TO HIM A 10:00PM HE WAS SLURING HIS WORDS AND THEN HE SAID I DONT LOVE HIM AND THEN HE SAID HE WOULD BE HOME IN 5 MIN HE TURNED OFF...
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chrissy
|
8
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924
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my pain then and now
(Preview)
Subject: Meditation: Pain God, if You love me, why must I endure pain? This question preoccupies many believers in their darkest hours of need. While pain comes in different forms and has different durations, suffering always comes with an objective greater than our comfort, pleasure, or persona...
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rosie light shines
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0
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614
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haxigonian XXIII
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
As things stand now...
troublemaking cousin is thankfully not comin up here...
social security evaluation is over; this one emphasized drugs, alcohol and anxiety. It took a lot out of me and I'm beat. The local social security office has my file now so that's taken care of as well...
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haximon
|
6
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623
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A BIG decision..
(Preview)
Last night I told my husband that the kids are I are leaving. I have ask him to leave several times and he wont so I found a place for me and the kids to go. Its temporary but taking it one day at a time is about all I can do for now.
This is HUGE, I am not sure my husband believed me at first. Now I am sure, I tol...
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Tammy
|
6
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656
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I want to cry
(Preview)
Thought my A was sober for a year and a half. Went out tonight for a much needed break and left him home with my 3 kids. Came home to find him passed out, naked in one of my kids bed. (Luckily all 3 were asleep).
Don't know what to do - Can't threated to leave because I work and can't handl...
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njmom
|
8
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890
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|
hey did YOU all go through this too??
(Preview)
hey everyone, talk about a lesson!! boy did i get one
i did my post on *levels of forgiveness* and it had my #1, #1, #3, with #3, being the least forgiveable and of COURSE i mentioned the perp in that one...
my loving and wise sponser...
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rosie light shines
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2
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628
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So confused
(Preview)
I am so confused. I talked with my therapist and my dad today. I have always depended on my dad to lead me in the right direction. They think that I should not file for a divorce, but a legal separation. My mother-in-law thinks I should give him one last chance. I feel so confuse...
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Powerless
|
1
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653
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haxigonian XXI
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
I have been asked to give my address again, It's
Mike Rolfe
111 W. Burnside
Portland, OR 97209
I have very bad news...the money I asked for did not come in time and the insurance company will not give me an extension...meaning...
As of Friday, I will be an uninsured motorist....
|
haximon
|
2
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611
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|
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did something nice for me today
(Preview)
Hello all:
Finally got my hair done. I made a nice dinner for friends of mine tonight. I enjoy cooking and haven't done much since my A has been gone (we used to cook together). Those were the good things I did for me. I've been sad these past few days thinking about my A and t...
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Kim
|
5
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763
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haxigonian XXII
(Preview)
[[ room ]]
My cousin made the save and my insurance is okay for now...
he and his wife may be coming here for a so-called surprise...this is very very bad for me...i don't need this right now with all the other hassle i'm goin thru!
i am cracking under the strain...
i've been crying......
|
haximon
|
4
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696
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|
|
New here - need some help
(Preview)
Hi,
I'm in need of some help here. I'm divorced with two boys and dad is an alcoholic. I'm dealing with a whole bunch of issues that I just don't even know where to start except with the most current I guess. I searched out a message board as my area doesn't offer much. My ex just went t...
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Daphyne
|
6
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637
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Feeling Feelings....Finally
(Preview)
Good morning Family~ I visited the board the other day for the first time in along time and wow, it felt so good to be back. I am going through my own emotional journey right now. I have taken some time off this year to do things "my way" and found myself with absolutely no direction and isolat...
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carla035
|
2
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578
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son-in-law's suicide 1 yr ago today
(Preview)
hi again!
and yet another issue in my never-ending saga of life! it was one year ago today, the 13th, that my son-in-law took his life. he was 24 yrs old. my daughter had been with him over 4 yrs, they had been married for almost 2, and had a 3 month old, beautiful baby girl when he died...
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search41
|
3
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623
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A simple thought
(Preview)
Hello,
Came across this in a favorite book of mine. Hope you like it.
Prayer
is the pathway.
Stillness
is the temple.
Love
is the offering we bring.
Peace
is the gift we are given.
Live strong,
Karilynn
|
Karilynn
|
1
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643
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I feel like crap!!!
(Preview)
On Monday I went to see a divorce attorney to start the process. I was so happy with my decision and felt as if everyone supported the decision I was making. I honestly felt like I was doing what was best for the children and myself. My father even offered to loan me the money to pay for t...
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Powerless
|
6
|
763
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I'm done enabling
(Preview)
I've allowed myself to ride a rollercoaster for the past year and a half. Divorced last month and last week my ex hits me with "I'm not sure if I did the right thing, I'm so sorry for the way I treated you, I wish I had done things differently, Let's go back to counceling." I'm thinking and hopi...
|
UncleLou
|
2
|
597
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|
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Taking some time off.....
(Preview)
Hello ((((((((((((roomies))))))))
I am needing to take some time off of chat to think about and regroup about my recovery!!!
I love you all so very much and i am so blessed to be apart of y'alls family!!
Thank you all for helping and sharing your ES&H.
If you want to chatt with me y...
|
bubbles1990
|
2
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632
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|
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my "levels" of forgiveness
(Preview)
Subject: Meditation: Forgiveness Does my inability to accept my own failings cause me to see myself as not measuring up? For my own peace of mind, I need to forgive even the most damaging transgressions; but forgiveness of others can only come when I have learned to forgive myself. OA Fo...
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rosie light shines
|
0
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646
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from victim to victory
(Preview)
Hope for Today - September 14
I was raised by two alcoholics, and I felt angry that I had to attend a support group to deal with this fact.
#######ROSIE....yep, mom was a REAL *A*....he drank hard, but was very much in control of when and where he drank....he had a worse...
|
rosie light shines
|
0
|
746
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|
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reprogramming
(Preview)
SEPTEMBER 13 >Times of Reprogramming > >Recovery is not all tiresome, unrewarded work. There are >times of joy and rest, times when we comfortably practice >what we have learned. There are times of change, times >when we struggle to learn something new or overcome a >partic...
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rosie light shines
|
0
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525
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Boundries - II
(Preview)
I did my first boundry tonight.
My A came home drunk again...and went to take a "nap" in the basement. Said he'd like dinner at 7. I said ok. I went to get him up at 6:55 and was unable to get much response. He finally grunted and I told him dinner was in 5 minutes and if he wasn't there I would eat without hi...
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sandie123
|
4
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651
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Up and down, is it normal?
(Preview)
Just when I start feeling like I am doing it, making good choices, and moving forward, then I hear something about my "A", and the rollercoaster starts all over again!
The Pastor friend that staged the intervention with me, heard from my "A", via email. He asked for forgivene...
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Candacem
|
1
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563
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Thanks alanon ozoz
(Preview)
Computer works..thank you, o oz of cyberspace. Don't know who is behind the magic curtain but I appreciate that I can get into chatroom now!
toto
|
toto12
|
0
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515
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Update on my "turmoil"
(Preview)
i want to thank everyone for your kind replies to my post "in turmoil" a week ago. your posts were right-on, and, of course, i have decided to stay, and not move back to my home town.
my dad had to leave town again last weekend, so i went and stayed with my mom last weekend too. i did a lo...
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search41
|
1
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666
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