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the dog....
(Preview)
good morning all,
okay so heres the deal, I can not let this one go....
yesterday I posted about the dog, Im going to a retret this weekend and my bf was having issues about where the dog is going. thx to all your comments I have decided to give him to my brother and wife, who are real dog lovers, th...
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sunny1
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6
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395
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belonging and connecting....what do YOU guys think???
(Preview)
Belonging And Connecting
We have powerful desires to belong and to connect with a special someone. We inherited a model for marriage and relationships that has remained largely unchanged for over 50 years. That traditional model was never intended to integrate our individual needs with th...
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rosie light shines
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3
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496
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damn it!! i DO belong
(Preview)
A SENSE OF BELONGING Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105
That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was experiencing was a sense of belonging b...
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rosie light shines
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1
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611
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anyone on here from Massachusetts?
(Preview)
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Barbara
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3
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495
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Anger has got a hold on me
(Preview)
I'm having a hard time since he didn't go to rehab. I'm sick to my stomach. I didn't think it would be affecting me this way. I'm angry at him, the insurance companies and a variety of others....but mostly I am angry at myself. I am obsessing again....worried about about every little thing he does. I feel...
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Kim
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5
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686
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Take what you like, and leave the rest
(Preview)
This is an important part of the suggested closing in alanon.
"Take what you like, and leave the rest"
Many people in recovery, weather it be Alanon, or AA, or any program, are coming from a terrible place, a place where we all were once ourselves. It is hard to break some of the nasty di...
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captcodee
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4
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1756
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Tired and have the blahs
(Preview)
Things are going o.k. I'm just not in a good mood this week. My a hasn't gone to meetings this week because he is very busy with work. I understand this, but I am still frustrateda and scared, because when he doesn't go that gets his stinkin' thinkin' going again. He gets grouc...
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hudsond
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4
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374
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BOY, i am really showing you all my heart!!! would love ESH
(Preview)
Beliefs about Money
I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the...
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rosie light shines
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1
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589
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Friday,11/11 OP Needed for AM Meeting
(Preview)
Hello - I will be unable to do this Friday's AM meeting. I am posting this as a friendly reminder and a "Thank You" to whoever takes over Have a Great Day, Wishes, Tea2
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tea2
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0
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320
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this sux
(Preview)
I have to go to therapy right now............grrrr i fuckin hate therapy..its boring and my therapist is a bitch..she bitched that I go to alanon..and not alateen..I said well at least I am going somewhere to help me....I told her I wanted a new therapist,and shes like why..I said just becau...
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Lauren ashley
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11
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665
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question to all who have stayed
(Preview)
i just read a bunch of replies to someones post about what life was like living with an active a. many people said that they live separate lives from their a and are happy. so my question is are all of you just existing in a relationship? or are your need actually being fullfilled? is there still intimacy?...
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notsonew1111
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12
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841
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If I had one wish
(Preview)
Hi all,
Everytime someone is asked about what one thing they would like to change in the world, most people answer "World Peace". That is all well and good, but I would say "a cure for alcoholism/addiction". A belief I have is that curing that would have a domino affect and many issues we have would go a...
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Dolphin123
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4
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650
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i know we probaly know this already but may be it could help
(Preview)
Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (Alcohol Dependence)
by Debra Wood, RNDefinition
Alcohol abuse is a disease that involves desire for alcohol and continuing to drink even when faced with alcohol-related job, legal, social, health, or family problems. Alcohol abuse can progress to alcoholism...
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chrissy
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2
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633
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quick ?????
(Preview)
Hi all,
I have a quesiton. I read alot about gob bag or god box. What is it how do you use it? I don't let go enough wondering if this would help me.
Thanks Nikkilou.
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nikkilou
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3
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598
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THIS IS THE HARD TIME
(Preview)
This is when it is the hardest time is when he is so sweet. You think to yourself wow this is going to be a good day. He doesn't seem to be getting into trouble today. So you let your guard down and then there you go you are in the same mess again.
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nycbt
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4
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618
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accepting love...HEALTHY love!!!
(Preview)
Accepting Love
Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or mo...
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rosie light shines
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1
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368
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I am back to HATRED, god help me
(Preview)
Ok, so my 'rents made a truce... the A promised to disclose where & when he was going, to be discreet - she told him to do wtvr he wanted.
Last night he was still saying, promising everything, not be lying or drinking. But my mom has friends that are his associates that have already sd otherwi...
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kitty
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11
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583
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wedding anniversary/feeling low
(Preview)
Today is my anniversary. 14 years married.
It will, if all goes according to plan, be the last anniversay of my marriage in which I am married to my husband.
I feel sad, lonely and tired.
i will not call him. After the dirt throwing Sunday morning he has called several times, I don't answer and he...
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megan
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16
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884
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was having trouble facing the fact that what I thought should be As bottom wasnt his bottom
(Preview)
and I think I just realized what I was doing - which is what got me here in the first place.
DH lost a kidney beginning of August. Doc found a large cancer lump so they removed it. DS & I went to FL shortly after Husbands operation (day before he was released - this was ok w/all). A few wks after we return...
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Barbara
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5
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681
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re my god bag the power of hp
(Preview)
hi guys it me again ,i got a phone call from the woman i am going to be watching her son she said she wouldn't need me until next month because the girl she had didnt know when she was leaving. so i said ok just let me know don't worry i will still do it. i hung up and i was so depressed . i wrote anothe...
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chrissy
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6
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381
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How does one accomplish this?? part 2
(Preview)
So the A. asks me if we can "talk". Something he hardly ever does. We go into a closed room and he asks me "You're planning on leaving, right?" My response...."One of us will be leaving". He's not happy (which I didn't expect him to be). He tells me how now is the time that...
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sg
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4
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454
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Progress for me
(Preview)
Hello all,
Funny thing, I realized my own progress lastnight and today.
I have been having a situation with my boyfriend. He works away 21 days then is home for 7. We do not live together and have only been in a relationship for 10ms. When I met him I was scard to death of do...
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sunny1
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7
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481
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celebrating my 48th bday w/out my A husband
(Preview)
taking son away this wknd to a hotel w/indoor wavepool - will have my 1st massage while there. Learning not to wait for others to help me celebrate. Will return Sun (after I take son to my birthday lunch) and ask A to take his A friend home. That boundary I will ask for as its "my special day"
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Barbara
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8
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691
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ME
(Preview)
I am upset about what happen last night. I had to take away a car key which was the easy part part. Not giving it back is going to be a hard part. I have to stand my ground. I always give to him. This is going to be hard for me.
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nycbt
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3
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467
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Detachment?
(Preview)
I am coming to terms with my alcoholic fiance and have recently learned about detachment through local Al-Anon meetings and Al-Anon literature.
The point (in my mind) of having a spouse is to have someone in life to share experiences with, someone to love and who will love me in...
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sallyb
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15
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634
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attn diva
(Preview)
Thank you for your words about my dog, I have added another post if you could read it. Anyone else got comments about my situation, I would be intereseted to hear?
Topic....my progress
Sunny1
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sunny1
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1
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582
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what would u do?
(Preview)
Here's the latest pickle I've gotten myself into....
Last week at our marriage counselling session, I agreed to put up with my A smoking pot at his
friend's house--as long as he left it there, didn't do it elsewhere,etc. This was our "experiment".
I knew that when we left the appointment that he...
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gknee
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4
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568
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what a drug....!!
(Preview)
I know that we are here due to the desiese of A, but this came to me via a friend who's cousin is in jail right now, and the wife is slowly dying. I have researched this terrible drug to be more aware, this poem is a hard reality.
Hope you dont mind me sharing it, sorry if it offends anyone.
Sunny1:s...
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sunny1
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4
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441
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LAST NIGHT
(Preview)
Yesterday I drove home from my parents excited to see Rick. When I got home from work I patiently wanted for him to come home. Didn't call all day. We went to vote. I had no idea who to really vote for but voted. Then around 7:00 he told me that he had to starighten out the mes he made on Sunday and that he would b...
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nycbt
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4
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466
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Feeling some relief
(Preview)
Thanks to everyone who posted replies to my "Can't Shake this one off" post. It really helped to hear different perspectives. I confronted my "a" with how I was feeling. I simply told him that I could appreciate his fear about losing me because I'm overweight, but I could not toler...
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twinmom2
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4
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339
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Funny thing happened at my meeting last night
(Preview)
Hi all,
Back in the beginning of October I had to get a new Driver's License and I did that. Well in my area they give you a paper license and then mail you a plastic one about two weeks later. So I got my plastic one about mid-October and took it to work to make a copy for work for the insurance so I can drive a w...
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Dolphin123
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1
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597
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I am blessed :)
(Preview)
I am blessed with so many things and it is so wonderful when a person can feel and see these things. These things may not be easy now for me with my mom and dad's failing health but I see the blessings in it and am embracing them now. Alzheimer's is still an awful horrible disease and for me espe...
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cdb
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4
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689
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What a cool board this is....
(Preview)
And I think EVERYONE associated with it should accept a well deserved hug and pat on the back... I find it quite amazing, to see the love and caring of so many people here - reaching out to those in need, even ignoring or looking past their anger and words - and recognizing it for what it is....
The...
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canadianguy
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6
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481
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WHY SO HARD
(Preview)
I meet my husband six yrs ago and been married for about 15 months. At that time he was getting out of jail for drug problems. He was doing drugs and drinking. I went through alot of voliet times with him. We would actually physical wrestle on the group, yell scream push each other. My husband is a very verb...
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nycbt
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2
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611
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The Disease Concept
(Preview)
Dear Friends,
I was reminded recently about compassion for the alcoholic. This was something that I knew about but had not put into practice for a while. I had become angry and resentful towards the alcoholics in my life for the damage they had caused me. I was angry at the diseas...
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bob6502
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6
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532
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Tired of being a fool
(Preview)
What is wrong with me? Why do I have hopes and dreams and disappointments. I am so sick of this crap. I went out shopping with my ex the a. He had called last Saturday night asking me if I wanted to go shopping with him Monday evening, spend some time together. He called me...
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hadit
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3
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615
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i can choose what kind of me i am gonna have
(Preview)
Hope for Today - November 9
I grew up affected by someone else's drinking. I seldom knew what was good for me, yet I knew what was best for others and didn't hesitate to tell them. I didn't know what I enjoyed doing for fun, but I could tell you what activities the alcoholic enjoyed. I feared o...
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rosie light shines
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0
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574
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ok guys I need the push - tonights the night
(Preview)
Thinking of trying my 2nd Al-Anon meeting (this time around). Tonight at 730. Someone please give me the push I need - thanks
I went to 1 3wks ago but didnt return.
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Barbara
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6
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724
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a new moment/day
(Preview)
Each & every day we can change our attitudes, thoughts, actons in a split second.
In a moment we can change & we keep moving into the future of new moments where we have a choice to make a change!
(from Collective Soul, "in a moment")... "we can wake up & be laughing,...
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kitty
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2
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536
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how do you know whats the alcoholism? whats just being a man? and whats being a jerk?
(Preview)
How do you know when to blame the alcoholism? Im seeing trails in my husband that would happen in other non-alcoholics too. How do you know whats the alcoholism? whats "being a man"? and whats just being a plain ole jerk?
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Barbara
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10
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743
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great website
(Preview)
another great website is www.gettingthemsober.com
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healing today
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1
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429
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anyone ever attend those Al-Anon conventions at hotels?
(Preview)
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Barbara
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8
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2871
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I just need to think,and stop being vulnerable
(Preview)
Ok today i went to my moms house..We had a very good time,but she drank the whole time I was there.. I did not like that,but she said it was just wine. I know its not hard liquor,but she does have a problem
I want her to realize she is missing out on my entire childhood,and that I won't be a ki...
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Lauren ashley
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2
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395
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Kathy S
(Preview)
Hey Kathy, I shared about my A and you asked me how I'm doing. I'm doing ok. I really am. Everyday is a tough chore for me. It really is. But to live with an alcoholic and for him to really want to try is also a blessing. Thank you so much for being concerned. We all have problems and some days we think our proble...
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Cathy
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1
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461
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i am there my cousin sent this to me
(Preview)
http://www.unityworldhq.org/JDF/IamThere.html 
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chrissy
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3
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391
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TODAY, i can change my stinking thinking
(Preview)
THOUGHT "There is no place in active life on which thought is negligible." -- T. S. Eliot
It is not a crime to think. It is not a sin to have a brain. To think is human.
However, so much of my past thinking was destructive and negative. The disease of addiction permeated every aspect of...
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rosie light shines
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1
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635
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Taking Care of Yourself & Consequences
(Preview)
I always put everyone in my life first. If a friend was having a difficult time, I would neglect my stuff to take care of them. This goes back to my childhood, taking care of my parent's stuff instead of mine. This is self-inflicted abuse. When I got into Alanon and started to take care of me, some of my frie...
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kissers
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3
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568
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pray for the stranger
(Preview)
I went to a meeting last night where the topic was "pray for the stranger." I got to thinking how to me very often the strangers I pray for are my own family. The people closest to me whom alcohol and drugs have twisted around and turned into people I don't know. This past weekend I sat across the table fro...
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hopefortoday
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1
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589
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that praying stuff actually working
(Preview)
As some of you know I have a new job....yeah!!!....but I also am dealing with a coworking who seems threatened by me. He has worked there for 6 years and has gotten comfy with the way things were. I on the other hand was told by the boss..."to correct any problems I saw and to basically do my job without dire...
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swolves
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0
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553
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GRATITUDE
(Preview)
I have never been more grateful for this program than I am today.This morning my mother died quietly in hosp after a long and painful year of one dissorder after another. I am grateful that she has no pain.
Considering where Al-Anon has brought me is a miracle - several yrs ago my mother a...
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abbyal
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18
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881
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Wednesday Morning Meeting Nov 8th
(Preview)
Need replacement chair for tommorow morning> i can not make it i will switchi someones meeting if you like. Could an op please take it tommorow?
thanks
kerry
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kerry5
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0
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488
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I Am So Tired
(Preview)
I found out my husband sent flowers to another woman and gave her a CD box set. The drinking started back the same week I found this out. He claims nothing happened, but the drinking has continued. His behavior has been rude and arrogant once he has two drinks in him. He goes fr...
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meowzmusic
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5
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674
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Why are we sorry?
(Preview)
I was just reading through the posts and noticed something that got me thinking.
I noticed in replies to shares that deal with a member going through a painful situation, so many of us start our replies by saying: I'm so sorry to hear that, or..... I'm so sorry you are going throug...
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KathyS
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11
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559
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Please tell me how to let go.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
Well I thought I was doing pretty good on leaving my daughter alone. But today we went to Legal Aid so she can get a lawyer to find out what rights she has, Her Ex seems to have made all the rules and decisions. Then we went to the court house to file a complaint against him because he refuses to...
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sandy
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3
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485
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are some of us "recovering alcoholics"?
(Preview)
I met DH back in 1981 when we were both heavy into the partying (drinking/cocaine). When our son was born in 1992 I realized I couldnt do it anymore, stopped the cocaine and stopped drinking. I now drink occasionally (vacations/etc but after a night of drinking Im fine for a few months/etc). Seems DH ju...
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Barbara
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6
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1573
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THe last time I talked
(Preview)
I went the whole work day with out doing any of the calling. He called me. I still have not done any of the calling. Even though I am going to be seeing him I am going to see if he does the calling when he goes out. Which I am hoping he doesn't but if he does I hope he does the calling. I am working on not calling him....
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nycbt
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2
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642
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not calling II
(Preview)
The good thing is in a half hour I am going to be going to lunch so I will be doing my walking and trying not to call him. At my company it is slow so that is why i am want to call. Well I don't know if he even gets why I am not calling. I don't know. But I am trying to get him to miss me but I doubt that is happening though...
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nycbt
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6
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609
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hi my god bag is working thank you kissers
(Preview)
i wanted to thank kissers for her wonderful post!!
i got a phone call last night but i couldn't reach her .so i called her this morning and it was from a parent from my old school she needs someone to watch her 9 month old baby i was thrilled. thats just what i needed to survive ....
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chrissy
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6
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1102
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Confronting The A
(Preview)
Hi,
I would like some input/ideas on confronting my a. Mine dropped out of program around Labor Day. I think she thought she could control it and then the first stressful situation came up and she turned to drinking. I believe she thinks the re...
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cidboy
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6
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599
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NOT calling
(Preview)
Well this morning wasn't that good I have called him a couple of times. But like in my last post someone told me to write up here instead of calling so that is what I am doing. I want to call him so bad but like that person said let him miss me. So I might be doing alot of posting today. So thanks for your suggesti...
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nycbt
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5
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527
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