Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

jeeves · jeeves

My A wife was let go from her job of 14 years in September 2005. After a two week binge she agreed to go to 3 months of rehab. This was the second rehab this year. When she returned in January she returned to drinking again. Now she sleeps in the guest bedroom, wakes...

Christy · Christy

Along with the pneumonia some tests came back that look pretty serious.. I forgot to mention....(my brain is out to lunch) A's ammonia levels in his blood are very high. His liver is not functioning correctly and ammonia backs up in to his kidney. I don't know exactly what an SGOT test stands for, b...

chris52 · chris52

I'm in a really bad place right now.Any progress I thought I was making is right oout of the window.Sorry-this is going to be a long post. I am English but living in Turkey.My A has a history of using violence when drunk and the police have beeen involved three times now. We finished after the last bout and...

flintfeet · flintfeet

i am feeling torn b/c of my situation with my dad. we have broken off all contact with him. i feel bad about it quite often. the thing is that i know he doesn't care. that feels so horrible to feel that i am that disposable! my sis tells me not to feel bad, it's not my fault, and when he wants to be a part of...

Christy · Christy

My A has stopped hallucinating (4 days worth), and he slept for 16 hrs. Today he is still very lethargic but does know who we are for the fist time since early Sunday. He has pneumonia and his blood pressure is still not under control. He also had an MRI today and that looked good. It looks like the initia...

MarylandVol · MarylandVol

Hi gang... So while on vacation, I met this guy that I am attracted to - funny, intelligent, sexy, etc. Then I found out he's recovering A. He is in the other program, but I have some questions, especially for you long-timers ( I'm coming up on my 2 year chip next month.) Is it unwise to even cons...

Picowitch · Picowitch

Help someone please, cant access chatroom, keep gettin an error message saying security exception cant access irc.mipchat.net

tea2 · tea2

Choices -This was the topic of my last two face to face meetings (both nights in a row) After a topic is given I take it with me to reflect on. I was given a choice to attend an Al-Anon Conference. I was second guessing my ‘choice’ to go. Someone asked me if I was going for the Al-Anon or for the friends. I l...

new member · izzymom

I am a new member, and I need some advise. We are doing an intervention on my 30-year-old son Monday and I am scared to death! I am afraid he will never speak to me again, but he is using and killing himself and I dont know what else to do. Has anyone done this? I guess I need a comfor...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Yesterday just got better and better for me. My "a" phoned me at work just before I was ready to leave and says, Hey I had a thought, why don't I move back in for a week, save up money and then the boys can help me move into my new place. He said don't you think that would help them transition bette...

Barbara · Barbara

Where do the speakers come from? Who assigns the speakers? Do they have both speaker and discussion meetings? Are there step meetings and what steps? Are there booths (like other conventions) with "freebies"? or no because AlAnon is self-supporting?

Rebecca · Rebecca

hey guys its my birthday 2day..... 25...quarter of a century. i feel ancient

thanks to all of you for your support, love and most importantly your friendship in the last number of months.. YE as a group were there for me throu thick and thin...im very gateful to all of you.. and ye should b...

Barbara · Barbara

OMG! This lady does not make sense! I understand she has alot on her plate right now with my younger brother being in jail and facing rehab, etc. She's telling me 1/2 stories, starts on 1 thing and changes to another, etc, etc. I want to listen to her but she's not making sense. How much am I suppose to get in...

Barbara · Barbara

Is it actually step 10 that we do step 4 continuously? There are certain things I think of that can be considered Step 4. These arent thought of all at once.

Anttay · Anttay

I have been in denial for a long time, pretending all the bad things haven't happened and praying each day that things will get better. Yesterday my daughter asked my A if he still loved me, he said I do but mommy is being mean to him. This broke my heart, I have been reading a wonderful b...

paintthinnr · paintthinnr

I am going to my second alanon meeting tonight. I can't believe I have let so much time lapse. But it was my birthday and then I got the stomach flu, so I wasn't really able to leave the house much. I am trying a step meeting tonight. I don't know that I am on any step yet, maybe just...

kissers · kissers

I was accepted to go through a women's entrepreneur training program. After I was accepted I had my family if they would watch my daughter 3 evenings per week until the end of March when I would graduate. They said they would do it, no problem. Then the put downs and nasty phonecalls started about how I wa...

marmare · marmare

I drove to work this morning after the tough week I had. My A relapsed and I let him know how unacceptable this is right now in my life. That my plate is so full stuff is dripping off the edges and he needs to pull himself together. My mom had breast cancer 10 years ago and now they have fou...

Powerless · Powerless

Yesterday I sold my husband's dog for him. The dog had begun snapping at our two year old and I was afraid to have it around. My husband said he wanted to buy some shoes and a few other things with the money. Usually I would take the money and go buy what he needs so he doesn't have any cash...

Barbara · Barbara

Its starting to make more sense. Not only take care of myself emotionally, spiritually and physically but to start feeling my emotions. Instead of thinking "Hes just so aggravating" its time to own those feelings "He make me feel bad" when he --- What is this AlAnon journey? a series of revelations...

Barbara · Barbara

Its been that way for a while now. Its at the point when I have something to say to him I go down in the basement where he "lives", take one look at him and turn around. I see in his eyes that he's been drinking and I know that the next morning he wont remember a word I say so I may as well forget it! Just came home...

Barbara · Barbara

Its a step meeting. I go to a Sat meeting where we break into 3 groups - begineer, discussion and step. I had sat in on Steps 2 and 3 in the past at that meeting. Tonights meeting happened to be on Step 4. Geesch guess Im meant to listen in on the steps!

Christy · Christy

Hi (((friends)))) First I want to to thank everyone for their prayers and phone calls. You all ar so important to me at this time. My hubby is still in ICU. As of yesterday he still did not know me, still climbing the walls and hallucinating. I'm also very grateful for my kids. They have truly ralli...

flintfeet · flintfeet

my parents are divorced (for 6yrs now). my mom left b/c she asked my dad to choose her or drinking. he chose drinking. my mom has no respect for my dad and just has a negative attitude about him. my dad and i have always been close. but now, i do not have any contact with him b/c of his actions and how h...

amy123 · amy123

I just wanted to give you a way to get in touch with me outside the chat room since we seem to have so much on common. I hope you are doing well.

Take care!! amy

Barbara · Barbara

What exactly is scapegoating? The Church I attend just sent a flyer asking parishioners to attend a Sun 2hr meeting. What does scapegoating mean to you? Im considering going. Thank you

doxie · doxie

Just wanted to give a quick update and get this down and out of my head. A/sons lawyer called me this morning. I have to be a character witness. Court is the 23rd of Feb. He told me that the max sentence for what son is charged with is 10 years in the state pen. The State's Attorney is asking for 4 years, an...

captcodee · captcodee

Three years ago (wow, already) my Grandfather passed away on Feb 17. He was the most special person in my life! The last time I talked to him, he called the day after Valentine's to wish me a happy valentine's day. I was seperated from the alcoholic in my life at the time. When I corrected him...

Nettie · Nettie

So, I'm really starting to feel this now. This is the second day this week where all I want to do is cry. Sleep and cry, sounds like a plan. The A calls all mad today because he has to pick the kids up from school, an hour early on top of it because school is done early today. He had to...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

I listen to my heart I listen to the wind howling Blowing away my hair I know it is you Telling me that you care I feel your touch I hear your voice When all I have to do is make that one choice Just to listen to my heart I am throwing the dart ...

sandie123 · sandie123

I am working of giving things up to my HP. Trust has always been an issue with me and I am struggling with it here. I was wondering for those of you who fully trust your HP (and I know that is a whole lot of you) or even partially trust your HP, do you beleive that everything that is done i...

captcodee · captcodee

I just want to post an update on my situation. This is how the power of the program works... I posted yesterday about asking my husband not to come home (on Valentine's day) I received so much support on my feelings, that I actually started to think clearly again. He came home anyways.&nbs...

sandie123 · sandie123

The strong and solitary tree Stood high upon the hill It showed its strength and beauty Its shadows oh so still The people came and overtook That pretty tree one night It only had its sun burnt limbs To fight with all its might The tree did loose The axes won The tr...

kitty · kitty

I was told something that hurt me in chat last night and it is very important for me to talk about. Someone that doesn't knw me, made some accusations about my personal relationship with mother. My mother has always been the alove of my life. She has idealized me when I did what she...

doxie · doxie

As all/most of you know, I am having a rough time right now while waiting for the court sentencing of my A/son. To try to help myself and to try to gain some control over me..... Just for today..... I will be unfraid. Especially, I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful and to believe as...

Amanda · Amanda

Well it's now officially been a month my A has been clean, after having returned from a very intensive rehab program that not only included antibuse, extreme aversion therapy, electroshock and more! He has been slow in getting off the couch though, attributing the lack of energy to his meds, weight l...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

I had such a crappy day yesterday obsessing over my "a" and this person he's with. So I made the choice to go to a therapy session with our counselor last night. I just let it all out even letting her know that he is not sober and I'm still living with active alcoholism and denial. She sa...

Lindy · Lindy

My last post was the calm before the storm. Well, it didn't last long and the storm hit full force on Friday. Here's the story: I was going to take my husband and son out for supper Friday evening. My husband is laid off so he has no money. I was going to pay. I told him that I would pick my son up and meet him at ou...

Barbara · Barbara

The emotions are all over the place tonight. Son brought home a paper today saying he'll be in honors classes next year when he enters the high school! Yup Im proud/happy However, husband is in the basement getting drunk. At least Im doing good with one of them.

Lindy · Lindy

Okay, so my A has not been drunk in at least four days!! Of course, he's still drinking, but just hasn't been sloppy drunk. Anyway, now he is moping around the house, probably resenting me because I told him I would leave him if he keeps drinking. He HATES not being drunk. He's not totally sober either, bu...

Christy · Christy

My life has been turned upside down and I won't be able to chair this Thursday for the morning meeting. My husband is in the hospital in intensive care and I have thrown my back out with constant spasms. Beyond that, we both have bronchitis. I'm trying to take care of me and be there for him too, it's...

odaat · odaat

I am sitting here feeling so let down by my "A." He is so smart he is actually dumb. We are in the middle of doing some minor fix ups on our house, and he is doing nothing but drinking more and more. Yesterday I explained to him if the drinking continues we are wasting our time fixing up a ho...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hi Friends, I had an incredibly emotional weekend with myself and my children. I was able to post on Saturday evening and received some good support. Thank you. My "a" has moved on and living with another woman, driving her car with out a license and endangering himself and her a...

bobump · bobump

Yesterday my A tells me, if someone comes to the door tomorrow answer it. Hmmm.... am I getting a gift or divorce papers? Personally I'm not sure which would be worse. The papers because then I didn't file myself (weird thought huh?) or receiving a gift. I don't know if it's a codie thing or experien...

Lindy · Lindy

I know I've been on here a lot and I know all my posts are so long. I'm starting to come to a realization about my situation and my alcoholic husband. When I first met him two and a half years ago, I thought he was wonderful. He told me what a witch his ex-wife was and how he's had so many psycho girlfriends in th...

nycbt · nycbt

When I thought my boyfriend now husband was going to go to jail for ten years and I wasn’t over my ex boyfriend I sleep with ex boyfriend him a couple of times. My boyfriend now husband told me that he wasn’t mad because he knew this guy was taking advantage of me. He told me to let it go. I was angry with myself...

bcanuck · bcanuck

Well, my *a* has been away in Mexico for a week with a coworker, and I think I got more relaxation out of this week than he did

Sure gives you some space to think and clear your head when your *a* is out of the picture for a while....the question is what do you do with your newly cleared head...

findingmyway · findingmyway

Whoops...I don't know what happened. I just posted a note, but it never hit the board. I hope it doesn't post twice. I was saying that it's just after 7 pm here and I can't wait for this day to be over. It's been almost a month since my A husband moved out. It's been harder and more lonely than I ever imagine...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

hi guys happy LOVE DAY to all!!! well the worst work in my house re-decor is over and i feel like rigormortis is setting in my tired body!!! i checked my pulse this am to see if i was still alive!!! the place (floors) looks great!!! i'll tell ya, i was...

captcodee · captcodee

I am wavering so bad with the alanon principles. I asked my husband not to come home today. I don't want to see him today. I am so angry that all the things I do to try to make our marraige, home, and family better are useless. Because of alanon I stopped trying to change his alcohol use.&n...

Nettie · Nettie

So, we go through this program to make ourselves better whether or not we stay with our A. I'm chosing to stay with my A right now, so how does that work with disciplining the children? I tend to think he's hard and unreasonable. However, I can be just the oposite, letting things just...

captcodee · captcodee

Working with an alcoholic is hopeless. I tried to come up with a comprimize, tried to change my behavior, tried to let his behaviour go, nothing works! It is valentine's day, and I asked him not to come home today. Tomorrow, I will make a new decision. I need to figure out if this is worth doing.&...

sdisnie · sdisnie

My dad made me go and file for a restraining order today, in case my AH was to come back to this state to try to get in contact with the kids. I didn't want to do this, and the reason is because if for some reason he comes back to defend himself at the next court date which is in 14 days, I will have...

debilyn · debilyn

I am trying to remember if anyone else has ever talked about this. My A is staying at his friends mom's house with his friend. They are out in the garage. He calls this friend his, "budi" his "partner." Makes me ill. I mean they are in trouble together and everything else together. Where one go...

Lynn · Lynn

Well, I am new here, I see all of you and the stories sound all too familiar. I can say that I have gotten strength from knowing I'm not alone. Although I am alone in my life a lot of the time. My A chooses to go out drinking, and not stay home, he currently has a court date for the last drink...

megan · megan

This was the topic in my Friday night face to face meeting. The leader of the meeting had an eloquent share and then we all shared This weekend I watched my 3 nephews while my brother and his wife spent a romantic weekend in Florida. They are teenagers, 12, 14, and 16. ...

AlaMom · AlaMom

we get the messages - just so long as we get the message. Tonight I was putting youngest to bed and he did not want to sleep in his room because of nightmares last night. To take his mind of the nightmares and ease the fear I read him a story (something I admit to not doing enough of). As I am rea...

flintfeet · flintfeet

i have been keeping myself busy the past few days, and it feels great! i have not thought about my dad and worrying about him. but today something changed. i know it probably sounds corney, but i feel for him today. it's valentine's day, and everyone should have someone that loves them. i have my sister,...

kitty · kitty

Willingness to surrender, a willingness give up & into the process of life & the Program. It is so irritating the way other ppl chime in with their two cents & tell you how you should be living your life or what u should be doing, when their lives are in no state of 'model perfection.' ...

Emafer · Emafer

So, I've now had my most recent "A" boyfriend out of my life, for the most part, for 6 weeks. I've had no contact with him and things have been going really well. However, last week a financial matter came up that we were both responsible for. We thought that it was taken care of up as it turns out, we owe mone...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	What is next? (Preview) My A wife was let go from her job of 14 years in September 2005. After a two week binge she agreed to go to 3 months of rehab. This was the second rehab this year. When she returned in January she returned to drinking again. Now she sleeps in the guest bedroom, wakes...	jeeves	3	497	Feb 17, 2006 by canadianguy
	Forgot to mention... (Preview) Along with the pneumonia some tests came back that look pretty serious.. I forgot to mention....(my brain is out to lunch) A's ammonia levels in his blood are very high. His liver is not functioning correctly and ammonia backs up in to his kidney. I don't know exactly what an SGOT test stands for, b...	Christy	5	379	Feb 17, 2006 by bobump
	I really messed up big time (Preview) I'm in a really bad place right now.Any progress I thought I was making is right oout of the window.Sorry-this is going to be a long post. I am English but living in Turkey.My A has a history of using violence when drunk and the police have beeen involved three times now. We finished after the last bout and...	chris52	7	521	Feb 17, 2006 by jrtjosey
	what to do-I'M LOST! (Preview) i am feeling torn b/c of my situation with my dad. we have broken off all contact with him. i feel bad about it quite often. the thing is that i know he doesn't care. that feels so horrible to feel that i am that disposable! my sis tells me not to feel bad, it's not my fault, and when he wants to be a part of...	flintfeet	2	319	Feb 17, 2006 by doxie
	update #2 (Preview) My A has stopped hallucinating (4 days worth), and he slept for 16 hrs. Today he is still very lethargic but does know who we are for the fist time since early Sunday. He has pneumonia and his blood pressure is still not under control. He also had an MRI today and that looked good. It looks like the initia...	Christy	5	438	Feb 17, 2006 by chris52
	Running under falling anvils? (Preview) Hi gang... So while on vacation, I met this guy that I am attracted to - funny, intelligent, sexy, etc. Then I found out he's recovering A. He is in the other program, but I have some questions, especially for you long-timers ( I'm coming up on my 2 year chip next month.) Is it unwise to even cons...	MarylandVol	3	347	Feb 17, 2006 by MarylandVol
	help (Preview) Help someone please, cant access chatroom, keep gettin an error message saying security exception cant access irc.mipchat.net	Picowitch	5	423	Feb 17, 2006 by flumpy
	Choices (Preview) Choices -This was the topic of my last two face to face meetings (both nights in a row) After a topic is given I take it with me to reflect on. I was given a choice to attend an Al-Anon Conference. I was second guessing my ‘choice’ to go. Someone asked me if I was going for the Al-Anon or for the friends. I l...	tea2	4	335	Feb 16, 2006 by leo
	new member (Preview) I am a new member, and I need some advise. We are doing an intervention on my 30-year-old son Monday and I am scared to death! I am afraid he will never speak to me again, but he is using and killing himself and I dont know what else to do. Has anyone done this? I guess I need a comfor...	izzymom	6	399	Feb 16, 2006 by izzymom
	Sharing joy and revelation today (Preview) Yesterday just got better and better for me. My "a" phoned me at work just before I was ready to leave and says, Hey I had a thought, why don't I move back in for a week, save up money and then the boys can help me move into my new place. He said don't you think that would help them transition bette...	twinmom2	2	293	Feb 16, 2006 by Lunamoth
	AlAnon conventions (Preview) Where do the speakers come from? Who assigns the speakers? Do they have both speaker and discussion meetings? Are there step meetings and what steps? Are there booths (like other conventions) with "freebies"? or no because AlAnon is self-supporting?	Barbara	1	308	Feb 16, 2006 by Faith73
	Birthday Girl... (Preview) hey guys its my birthday 2day..... 25...quarter of a century. i feel ancient thanks to all of you for your support, love and most importantly your friendship in the last number of months.. YE as a group were there for me throu thick and thin...im very gateful to all of you.. and ye should b...	Rebecca	9	362	Feb 16, 2006 by Flora123
	mother is not making sense - I want to support her (Preview) OMG! This lady does not make sense! I understand she has alot on her plate right now with my younger brother being in jail and facing rehab, etc. She's telling me 1/2 stories, starts on 1 thing and changes to another, etc, etc. I want to listen to her but she's not making sense. How much am I suppose to get in...	Barbara	0	276	Feb 16, 2006 by Barbara
	Is 4th step discovery/work continuous or is it all at once? (Preview) Is it actually step 10 that we do step 4 continuously? There are certain things I think of that can be considered Step 4. These arent thought of all at once.	Barbara	1	302	Feb 16, 2006 by abbyal
	Lies (Preview) I have been in denial for a long time, pretending all the bad things haven't happened and praying each day that things will get better. Yesterday my daughter asked my A if he still loved me, he said I do but mommy is being mean to him. This broke my heart, I have been reading a wonderful b...	Anttay	3	542	Feb 16, 2006 by Anttay
	Going back tonight (Preview) I am going to my second alanon meeting tonight. I can't believe I have let so much time lapse. But it was my birthday and then I got the stomach flu, so I wasn't really able to leave the house much. I am trying a step meeting tonight. I don't know that I am on any step yet, maybe just...	paintthinnr	2	340	Feb 16, 2006 by just me
	The rug is being pulled out from under me (Preview) I was accepted to go through a women's entrepreneur training program. After I was accepted I had my family if they would watch my daughter 3 evenings per week until the end of March when I would graduate. They said they would do it, no problem. Then the put downs and nasty phonecalls started about how I wa...	kissers	7	391	Feb 16, 2006 by Diva
	Accepting Support (Preview) I drove to work this morning after the tough week I had. My A relapsed and I let him know how unacceptable this is right now in my life. That my plate is so full stuff is dripping off the edges and he needs to pull himself together. My mom had breast cancer 10 years ago and now they have fou...	marmare	2	309	Feb 16, 2006 by leo
	I made progress...I think (Preview) Yesterday I sold my husband's dog for him. The dog had begun snapping at our two year old and I was afraid to have it around. My husband said he wanted to buy some shoes and a few other things with the money. Usually I would take the money and go buy what he needs so he doesn't have any cash...	Powerless	1	311	Feb 16, 2006 by jrtjosey
	"Focus on yourself instead of your A" (Preview) Its starting to make more sense. Not only take care of myself emotionally, spiritually and physically but to start feeling my emotions. Instead of thinking "Hes just so aggravating" its time to own those feelings "He make me feel bad" when he --- What is this AlAnon journey? a series of revelations...	Barbara	1	498	Feb 16, 2006 by CAM0914
	ever just look at your A husband and just know not to even bother talking? (Preview) Its been that way for a while now. Its at the point when I have something to say to him I go down in the basement where he "lives", take one look at him and turn around. I see in his eyes that he's been drinking and I know that the next morning he wont remember a word I say so I may as well forget it! Just came home...	Barbara	5	445	Feb 16, 2006 by Powerless
	I went back to a meeting that I attended back in Oct (Preview) Its a step meeting. I go to a Sat meeting where we break into 3 groups - begineer, discussion and step. I had sat in on Steps 2 and 3 in the past at that meeting. Tonights meeting happened to be on Step 4. Geesch guess Im meant to listen in on the steps!	Barbara	3	382	Feb 16, 2006 by abbyal
	Update (Preview) Hi (((friends)))) First I want to to thank everyone for their prayers and phone calls. You all ar so important to me at this time. My hubby is still in ICU. As of yesterday he still did not know me, still climbing the walls and hallucinating. I'm also very grateful for my kids. They have truly ralli...	Christy	2	505	Feb 15, 2006 by bobump
	dying alone... (Preview) *my parents are divorced (for 6yrs now). my mom left b/c she asked my dad to choose her or drinking. he chose drinking. my mom has no respect for my dad and just has a negative attitude about him.* *my dad and i have always been close. but now, i do not have any contact with him b/c of his actions and how h...*	flintfeet	1	350	Feb 15, 2006 by Jayda
	Pofu stop here (Preview) I just wanted to give you a way to get in touch with me outside the chat room since we seem to have so much on common. I hope you are doing well. Take care!! amy	amy123	2	392	Feb 15, 2006 by amy123
	Scapegoating - define it please (Preview) What exactly is scapegoating? The Church I attend just sent a flyer asking parishioners to attend a Sun 2hr meeting. What does scapegoating mean to you? Im considering going. Thank you	Barbara	1	523	Feb 15, 2006 by flintfeet
	A/son jail update (Preview) Just wanted to give a quick update and get this down and out of my head. A/sons lawyer called me this morning. I have to be a character witness. Court is the 23rd of Feb. He told me that the max sentence for what son is charged with is 10 years in the state pen. The State's Attorney is asking for 4 years, an...	doxie	9	384	Feb 15, 2006 by mamasan
	My very special Day after Valentine's memory (Preview) Three years ago (wow, already) my Grandfather passed away on Feb 17. He was the most special person in my life! The last time I talked to him, he called the day after Valentine's to wish me a happy valentine's day. I was seperated from the alcoholic in my life at the time. When I corrected him...	captcodee	1	343	Feb 15, 2006 by marmare
	Hurtful (Preview) So, I'm really starting to feel this now. This is the second day this week where all I want to do is cry. Sleep and cry, sounds like a plan. The A calls all mad today because he has to pick the kids up from school, an hour early on top of it because school is done early today. He had to...	Nettie	5	472	Feb 15, 2006 by bcanuck
	A new poem of mine... (Preview) I listen to my heart I listen to the wind howling Blowing away my hair I know it is you Telling me that you care I feel your touch I hear your voice When all I have to do is make that one choice Just to listen to my heart I am throwing the dart ...	Lauren ashley	7	510	Feb 15, 2006 by Flora123
	HP take me away... HELP PLEASE! (Preview) I am working of giving things up to my HP. Trust has always been an issue with me and I am struggling with it here. I was wondering for those of you who fully trust your HP (and I know that is a whole lot of you) or even partially trust your HP, do you beleive that everything that is done i...	sandie123	9	693	Feb 15, 2006 by paintthinnr
	Thank you all for your ESH yesterday (Preview) I just want to post an update on my situation. This is how the power of the program works... I posted yesterday about asking my husband not to come home (on Valentine's day) I received so much support on my feelings, that I actually started to think clearly again. He came home anyways.&nbs...	captcodee	1	283	Feb 15, 2006 by hudsond
	Sadness... a poem i wrote (Preview) The strong and solitary tree Stood high upon the hill It showed its strength and beauty Its shadows oh so still The people came and overtook That pretty tree one night It only had its sun burnt limbs To fight with all its might The tree did loose The axes won The tr...	sandie123	3	526	Feb 15, 2006 by Lauren ashley
	the love of my life (Preview) I was told something that hurt me in chat last night and it is very important for me to talk about. Someone that doesn't knw me, made some accusations about my personal relationship with mother. My mother has always been the alove of my life. She has idealized me when I did what she...	kitty	9	507	Feb 15, 2006 by kitty
	Just For Today (Preview) As all/most of you know, I am having a rough time right now while waiting for the court sentencing of my A/son. To try to help myself and to try to gain some control over me..... Just for today..... I will be unfraid. Especially, I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful and to believe as...	doxie	3	335	Feb 15, 2006 by kismetstrand
	One Month (Preview) Well it's now officially been a month my A has been clean, after having returned from a very intensive rehab program that not only included antibuse, extreme aversion therapy, electroshock and more! He has been slow in getting off the couch though, attributing the lack of energy to his meds, weight l...	Amanda	3	371	Feb 15, 2006 by captcodee
	A little ray of hope and me today (Preview) I had such a crappy day yesterday obsessing over my "a" and this person he's with. So I made the choice to go to a therapy session with our counselor last night. I just let it all out even letting her know that he is not sober and I'm still living with active alcoholism and denial. She sa...	twinmom2	2	376	Feb 15, 2006 by captcodee
	The Friday night disaster (Preview) My last post was the calm before the storm. Well, it didn't last long and the storm hit full force on Friday. Here's the story: I was going to take my husband and son out for supper Friday evening. My husband is laid off so he has no money. I was going to pay. I told him that I would pick my son up and meet him at ou...	Lindy	2	421	Feb 15, 2006 by paintthinnr
	son assigned to high school honors - husband getting drunk (Preview) The emotions are all over the place tonight. Son brought home a paper today saying he'll be in honors classes next year when he enters the high school! Yup Im proud/happy However, husband is in the basement getting drunk. At least Im doing good with one of them.	Barbara	7	412	Feb 15, 2006 by Barbara
	My A-either depressed or drunk (Preview) Okay, so my A has not been drunk in at least four days!! Of course, he's still drinking, but just hasn't been sloppy drunk. Anyway, now he is moping around the house, probably resenting me because I told him I would leave him if he keeps drinking. He HATES not being drunk. He's not totally sober either, bu...	Lindy	2	437	Feb 15, 2006 by megan
	Need Chairperson Thursday A.M. & Prayers (Preview) My life has been turned upside down and I won't be able to chair this Thursday for the morning meeting. My husband is in the hospital in intensive care and I have thrown my back out with constant spasms. Beyond that, we both have bronchitis. I'm trying to take care of me and be there for him too, it's...	Christy	7	444	Feb 15, 2006 by Christy
	Feeling Let Down (Preview) I am sitting here feeling so let down by my "A." He is so smart he is actually dumb. We are in the middle of doing some minor fix ups on our house, and he is doing nothing but drinking more and more. Yesterday I explained to him if the drinking continues we are wasting our time fixing up a ho...	odaat	8	563	Feb 15, 2006 by Lindy
	In the emotional soup trying to dig out.. (Preview) Hi Friends, I had an incredibly emotional weekend with myself and my children. I was able to post on Saturday evening and received some good support. Thank you. My "a" has moved on and living with another woman, driving her car with out a license and endangering himself and her a...	twinmom2	3	493	Feb 15, 2006 by Lindy
	well I have an oppostie problem of most Alanon's this Vday. (Preview) Yesterday my A tells me, if someone comes to the door tomorrow answer it. Hmmm.... am I getting a gift or divorce papers? Personally I'm not sure which would be worse. The papers because then I didn't file myself (weird thought huh?) or receiving a gift. I don't know if it's a codie thing or experien...	bobump	8	483	Feb 15, 2006 by paintthinnr
	The pattern is becoming clear (Preview) I know I've been on here a lot and I know all my posts are so long. I'm starting to come to a realization about my situation and my alcoholic husband. When I first met him two and a half years ago, I thought he was wonderful. He told me what a witch his ex-wife was and how he's had so many psycho girlfriends in th...	Lindy	3	462	Feb 15, 2006 by maresie
	painfully (Preview) When I thought my boyfriend now husband was going to go to jail for ten years and I wasn’t over my ex boyfriend I sleep with ex boyfriend him a couple of times. My boyfriend now husband told me that he wasn’t mad because he knew this guy was taking advantage of me. He told me to let it go. I was angry with myself...	nycbt	5	397	Feb 15, 2006 by maresie
	Vacation nearly over (Preview) Well, my a has been away in Mexico for a week with a coworker, and I think I got more relaxation out of this week than he did Sure gives you some space to think and clear your head when your a is out of the picture for a while....the question is what do you do with your newly cleared head...	bcanuck	4	353	Feb 15, 2006 by Maria123
	Is this day over yet? (Preview) Whoops...I don't know what happened. I just posted a note, but it never hit the board. I hope it doesn't post twice. I was saying that it's just after 7 pm here and I can't wait for this day to be over. It's been almost a month since my A husband moved out. It's been harder and more lonely than I ever imagine...	findingmyway	3	379	Feb 15, 2006 by Maria123
	HAPPY LOVE DAY!!!! (Preview) hi guys happy LOVE DAY to all!!! well the worst work in my house re-decor is over and i feel like rigormortis is setting in my tired body!!! i checked my pulse this am to see if i was still alive!!! the place (floors) looks great!!! i'll tell ya, i was...	rosie light shines	4	373	Feb 15, 2006 by bobump
	If you are solid in the program, I could sure use your help. (Preview) I am wavering so bad with the alanon principles. I asked my husband not to come home today. I don't want to see him today. I am so angry that all the things I do to try to make our marraige, home, and family better are useless. Because of alanon I stopped trying to change his alcohol use.&n...	captcodee	8	548	Feb 15, 2006 by cdb
	Question stemming from confusion (Preview) So, we go through this program to make ourselves better whether or not we stay with our A. I'm chosing to stay with my A right now, so how does that work with disciplining the children? I tend to think he's hard and unreasonable. However, I can be just the oposite, letting things just...	Nettie	3	373	Feb 15, 2006 by Jeannie
	Split again??? (Preview) Working with an alcoholic is hopeless. I tried to come up with a comprimize, tried to change my behavior, tried to let his behaviour go, nothing works! It is valentine's day, and I asked him not to come home today. Tomorrow, I will make a new decision. I need to figure out if this is worth doing.&...	captcodee	4	463	Feb 14, 2006 by Jeannie
	Restraining order (Preview) My dad made me go and file for a restraining order today, in case my AH was to come back to this state to try to get in contact with the kids. I didn't want to do this, and the reason is because if for some reason he comes back to defend himself at the next court date which is in 14 days, I will have...	sdisnie	6	490	Feb 14, 2006 by Jeannie
	he's in love (Preview) I am trying to remember if anyone else has ever talked about this. My A is staying at his friends mom's house with his friend. They are out in the garage. He calls this friend his, "budi" his "partner." Makes me ill. I mean they are in trouble together and everything else together. Where one go...	debilyn	9	484	Feb 14, 2006 by debilyn
	At a loss (Preview) Well, I am new here, I see all of you and the stories sound all too familiar. I can say that I have gotten strength from knowing I'm not alone. Although I am alone in my life a lot of the time. My A chooses to go out drinking, and not stay home, he currently has a court date for the last drink...	Lynn	9	454	Feb 14, 2006 by Powerless
	Freedom (Preview) This was the topic in my Friday night face to face meeting. The leader of the meeting had an eloquent share and then we all shared This weekend I watched my 3 nephews while my brother and his wife spent a romantic weekend in Florida. They are teenagers, 12, 14, and 16. ...	megan	7	413	Feb 14, 2006 by kitty
	Doesn't matter where... (Preview) we get the messages - just so long as we get the message. Tonight I was putting youngest to bed and he did not want to sleep in his room because of nightmares last night. To take his mind of the nightmares and ease the fear I read him a story (something I admit to not doing enough of). As I am rea...	AlaMom	5	409	Feb 14, 2006 by bd
	no one to love (Preview) i have been keeping myself busy the past few days, and it feels great! i have not thought about my dad and worrying about him. but today something changed. i know it probably sounds corney, but i feel for him today. it's valentine's day, and everyone should have someone that loves them. i have my sister,...	flintfeet	1	353	Feb 14, 2006 by bd
	willngness to surrender (Preview) Willingness to surrender, a willingness give up & into the process of life & the Program. It is so irritating the way other ppl chime in with their two cents & tell you how you should be living your life or what u should be doing, when their lives are in no state of 'model perfection.' ...	kitty	2	432	Feb 14, 2006 by maresie
	Deailing with your "A" (Preview) So, I've now had my most recent "A" boyfriend out of my life, for the most part, for 6 weeks. I've had no contact with him and things have been going really well. However, last week a financial matter came up that we were both responsible for. We thought that it was taken care of up as it turns out, we owe mone...	Emafer	5	442	Feb 14, 2006 by Emafer
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.