Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Becky1 · Becky1

My A husband of 5 years left Monday night screaming at me. Sent an email that he wants a divorce. Have not heard from him since. I am unable to go to work, and am stressed about my job being there when I get back. Hub was court ordered into counseling which ins. will not pay for, and he can't afford the house pm...

Lindy · Lindy

My alcoholic husband was actually doing okay for a couple of weeks. He was drinking, but he was not drunk or rude to me. Of course I could see the small changes last night and the cycle starting all over again. He must have been sitting in a bar for awhile yesterday while I was working. He's still laid off an...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Hope for Today - February 22 I found a carrot and two lumps of coal on my sidewalk and wondered what they were doing there. I thought it odd. Suddenly remembering that a snowman once stood on that place, I chuckled at my own suspicious thoughts. Even so, I had an eerie feeling of something st...

codependentme · codependentme

Hi everyone. I am just wondering if this is the right place for me. I will try to be brief. I am not with an alcoholic or addict, but with a mentally ill/personality disordered person, who used to use cocaine and alcohol but has not in many years. I am codependent and grew up with an abusive alcoholi...

leo · leo

Just wanted to thank everyone for their prayers and to let you know that there is definitely a higher power. My friend is still with us for the time being and now has her husband by her side in the city. I spoke to him today and told him how much is wife loved him and that I knew he loved her just as...

kitty · kitty

All I can do, is focus on me, control me & change me. Sad for this to be so difficult & guilt laden for us but it still takes me some work & hard focus some days, to just allow myself to consider my wants, needs & desires. It gets easier with practise, just like forgiveness. ...

Kim · Kim

Hello all: Yesterday my A had an appoinment with the gastoenterologist to get the results of his Hep C blood work. While he was in treatment he was given an antibody test that came back positive. Upon the confirmatory it was found to be NEGATIVE. Whic hwas great news. He wi...

doxie · doxie

Someone in chat the other day said that they knew of a good group for Moms/families of prisoners. Does anyone remember who that was, or does anyone have any websites or groups they could recommend? Today is proving to be challenging. Thanks, Doxie

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I just wanted to say it is so nice to see so many new names here on the board and in chat. If you have questions here or there personal or technical don't be afraid to ask ask. You can ask them privately by clicking on any of our names and you will have the option to speak one on one. once aga...

Barbara · Barbara

Ok I really dont mind my son being home for school vacation. Dont need to get out the door 2.5hrs earlier than I leave for work to get him to the bus. However when I come downstairs and A husband is hungover in bed (we sleep separately) it really grinds on me! He calls in sick alot on Fridays. I cant get in ther...

marcie301 · marcie301

A couple of days ago I posted about my A relapsing. We have 2 small children (1&3) and I know one time for sure he came with beer after picking our son up from preschool. Two of the bottles were empty but he swore he poured them out on the way home because he felt bad for even buying it...

bobump · bobump

I heard that those in chat at somepoint yesterday said a group prayer for me and my family. All I can say is I heard about this while the caseworker was still at my house and couldn't even think about it anymore because I didn't want to be crying as soon as I talked to the caseworker. Thank you all so much...

Powerless · Powerless

My house is finally finished. The landscapers finished today and the painters finished yesterday. My cabinets have been installed, the front door and interior doors have been replaced. I am too exhausted to enjoy it. My mother-in-law has kep the baby for two weeks while...

paintthinnr · paintthinnr

The weekend is coming up, which means I will be going to my boyfriends'. He had recently quit drinking at the insistance of his father, whom he lives with. His father goes away sometimes on weekends and I stay at my bf's. Now that his father is away, I know he will want to get a bottle of...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

This past week things have been coming to a head here. I discovered the 17 year old stepdaughter is smoking and had a bottle of vodka (big size) hidden in her drawer - her 21 year old sister has been buying the cigarettes for her, my 23 year old son bought one pack for her. The 17 year old is visi...

starangel · starangel

Last April my husband let me in on his secret problem with oxycontin and cocaine abuse. I knew something was up since so much money was missing. Although I didn't notice the symptoms of abuse since he always uses while drinking. I always thought he was drunk. Well it has been...

Jill · Jill

I've known my a for 7 years. Right before the New Year, I told him all the time I've known you, the focus has been on you. It's going to be 7 years of the Year of Jill starting Jan 20056. He agreed (easy cuz nothing changes if...). Nearly the end of February, and it hit me, the focus is still on him. I have rece...

Picowitch · Picowitch

Well, after a 6 month separation, and a lot of soul searching and taking care of me I decided to take the risk and see how it goes, and told hubby on Friday that he could come home. As soon as I said it I thought oh god what have I set myself up for - I can see changes in him and as far as I am aware he has only had 1 sl...

flintfeet · flintfeet

today is a bad day for me. no reason in paticular, but i just am worrying about my dad. i love him sooooo much!! i know that he loves me, too. but his drinking hurts me so much that i have detached myself from him. i refuse to support him and hold his hand while his life goes to sh*t. i wish i could jus...

hudsond · hudsond

Well I got a couple of the Getting Them Sober books--the first and fourth ones. I have been reading on them for the past few days. I ordered them a couple of weeks ago. Anyway--after a few more yucky days, he has decided again that he is through with the drugs--the last time "was enoug...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

Suddenly Life is again a seed I am slipping further and further away from you For I do not know what else to do I am always feeling persistently blue Surrounded by darkness yearning for the light There is a tunnel ahead It calls my name It is time for me to go It is not you to blame ...

Becky1 · Becky1

This is a song by Carrie Underwood, and the lyrics fit so well what we alanon members need to do.....so here it is..I've been thinking about this song lately due to my current situation..I am powerless.... She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati On a snow white Christmas Eve Going ho...

figaro · figaro

My sister in law advised me that my brother has threatened suicide three times this month, including today. She is scared and wants me to talk to him. I spoke with him regarding her concern. He told me that she violated confidentiality and that I should not worry. He told me t...

leo · leo

Hi everyone, My very good friend is at the moment going through the final stages of her life as it is on this earth with cancer. She is in a lot of pain and now 1300kms away in the city away from family and friends. This lady lives with her husband (a drinker) who is not able to be by her side bec...

paintthinnr · paintthinnr

I have heard much talk about slogans, but where do you find them/learn them? Anyone have any favorites?

sweetums · sweetums

Well I noticed the funniest thing. When he calls me or texts me, I feel like a kind of justification and like I am really 'doing' something here for myself. When he doesn't I feel lonely and like 'what's the point?' Why the heck does what I am doing here in my own house have to hinge upon what he...

terascot · terascot

My husband is a recovering addict/alcoholic. He also struggles with chronic pain, and sometimes overuses his pain meds (in my opinion.) I try to "detach" from his slogged demeanor on those occassions, but it really bothers me to see him that way. It reminds me of when I was young and my dad was drunk. I f...

marmare · marmare

Has anybody heard from Dolphin? Hugs Mary

rtexas · rtexas

This is a pamphalet handed to me today at my first f2f meeting ever. I nearly burst into tears as I read this booklet written 4 years after I was born about what is happening in my life today. To all of you who kept saying get ye to a meeting.... THANK YOU! It was a steps meeting, but all I cou...

Christy · Christy

A was "supposed" to come home today... I just called him and asked what time I should pick him up. He said Dr. wants him one more day. BP is back up and ammonia level in blood is rising again. Poor guy. The good thing is I can meet with my Sponsor, I always do on Thursdays and was not able to last week. ...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Well, since what he said yesterday (what I wrote in my last post), I haven't heard from him again regarding it. But he did call my friend today and to her he sounded a bit annoyed. He wanted to know what I wanted to do, and she said that I didn't know, I was very confused. Then he said I was...

marcie301 · marcie301

I have been reading and benefitting from everyone's post's since I found this site a few weeks ago but this is the first time I've posted. I attended f2f meetings a few years ago as I have several A's in my life. The one I have the biggest frustration with is my husband. He has been doing AA a...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

Clearing Your Space For Change In life, we tend to have an easier time acquiring possessions than we do getting rid of them. Just as we harbor emotional baggage that is difficult to let go of, our lives can tend to be filled with material objects that we may feel compelled to hold on to. Most...

bobump · bobump

I must be making some progress. Cause I'm going to ask something that I normally would not reach out for. Tomorrow around 5pm eastern is the scheduled visit for dyfs (child services). If I could impose on anyone that would feel inclined to pray that I am doing god's work, that how I'm h...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

(((((Roomies)))))), I could really use some ES&H on this issue. I find that I really struggle both with resentments and the desire to retaliate if I feel injured by someone close to me. If I feel hurt, I tend to want to hurt back. The retaliations are "minor"--silent treatment, sulking, retrea...

Emafer · Emafer

So I"m not allowed to control my alcoholics. I'm not allowed to control the people around me. I can control my feelings and my actions. So I want to redecorate my house. However I live with 2 roommates. And for the alst 6 months I've been putting things off in order to make them happy. In the meantime we h...

maresie · maresie

Well I have spent the last two days in bed a lot because my house is freezing. The A has not arranged with the landlord the heating stuff he was supposed to. I really went all out before Christmas to get the landlord to agree to a new heater. The A is supposed to provide him a few simple measurements ca...

megan · megan

Here is an interesting recovery parable I heard a story about a woman walking across a high bridge, on her journey. She saw someone coming to her but could not make anything out or who it was. As this person got closer she saw that he had something tied around his waist but again could not make out what...

sweetums · sweetums

amazingly, an Ozzy song.... Been around this world so many times If you could only see my mind I watch my secret heaven turn to hell Faith alone has guided me The ghost of my own destiny I haven’t even got a soul to sell All the thing I put me through I wouldn’t wish my hell on you Yo...

chris52 · chris52

Another sleepless night,doing the usual round of "what if's?" and brought myself up short by telling myself that I can spend days or weeks or months analysing where it's all gone wrong.....but the end result is I am where I am....I KNOW how I got here and no amount of "wishing things could have gone diff...

Barbara · Barbara

someone at last nights F2F read this page - I came to AlAnon confused about what was and was not my responsibility. Today after lots of Step work, I believe I am responsible for the following: to be loyal to my values, to please myself first, to keep an open mind, to detach with love, to rid myself of ange...

Emafer · Emafer

I recently got chided by an AA friend for not letting an ex-boyfriend make amends to me. I explained that I have no communication with this person for a reason and just beucase they've been sober for 5 month is no reason for me to get all emotionally involved with someone that I don't see as having a lot to o...

Becky1 · Becky1

After almost 9 years relationship, and 5 years of marriage, he wants out. The alcohol is in control. Last year, in Jan. there was an incident where he was out of control, and flinging his arms around, and accidentally hit my nose and caused it to bleed. I became hysterical, filed charges, his mot...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

I know you hurt She looks at me with a blank stare I try to ignore it but I do care I like her I really do I just want her to like me and that is no lie Her icy blue eyes I can tell of the hurt she carries inside Hiding behind her beautiful hair buying material things But I know w...

Christy · Christy

My husband is being released tomorrow and is willing to do an out pt. rehab program along w/AA.. I've called the insurance company and got the names of several addiction specialists..the rest is up to him. I doubt he'll be going anywhere for at least a week as he is very sick and puny still. Because of the...

aunitedway · aunitedway

I love the strength and energy that comes from this website. The chat rooms. The comaraderie of the people at the online meetings and the "shares." Very moving. There is this ((( energy ))) it comes rushing through....from a wonderful carin...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

i speant the last week going to work and doing the things i loved and missing my a like crazy. he was calling me alot saying how he missed me but i told him to not call me unless he was gonna get back into aa. we didnt speak for a few days and i still went out and had fun. i didnt go back to my old thinking while i was o...

ditto · ditto

My a and I own our business together. I have put it on the market. Today I recieved an offer which we have verbally accepted. The contract will be faxed to me tomorrow for our signature. Then we must wait while the contingencies are met. If all goes well we will have the store so...

hudsond · hudsond

My a had 6 sober days. Honestly I was getting very excited--I know I know better, but I always hope too much! He had a couple of disappointments and now says f--- the world. He is just going to look out for himself. I haven't decided if this is all just huge pity party and his I'm going to show th...

paintthinnr · paintthinnr

I really want to move on to Step 2, but have am still having a real problem with the "God" stuff. How does one just "come to believe" in it? I believe in some sort of energy that connects all things, but it is dispassionate. It does not care for me or anyone. I want to move further i...

rtexas · rtexas

Topic of discussion last night was divorce... (or not) I find myself saying that since you don't think your drinking causes a problem here at the house, here are the things that I struggle with and blame on the alcohol. - You don't believe what I say I feel, how I see things happen or what my int...

bobump · bobump

Well after my daughters pyschologist appt yesterday, he informed me that he is calling DYFS (might be called child protective services in your state) today. He started it off saying the my daughter is obviously not a happy camper and that she is happier when she is no thome. He said that he wasn't c...

Barbara · Barbara

Just wondering. I think the dates are April 21-23

debilyn · debilyn

I read my post and it is screwed up. oh well. It was my brother who brought me the pretty stuff and called later to see if I was ok. yea that is what I mean by insanity. I still have hope he will care enough to help some. Just cannot believe how awful he has become. Well I dragged home water....

flintfeet · flintfeet

i have been keeping busy lately and have not had much time to worry about my dad. but the past 2 nights i have had dreams about my A dad. here goes: DREAM #1...i am at my dad's house. it is a mess, beer cans everywhere, it smells, he got sick everywhere, and acts like nothing is wrong. i yell at him and he clos...

sweetums · sweetums

Well I am finally able to share some of my experiences on the message board! I sincerely enjoy reading all the things everyone has to say and find much solace in it. It is so good to know that I am not alone, and that my situation is far, far from being unique! My A is my boyfriend (ex??not sure yet). I have t...

marmare · marmare

Well guys! I accepted the job I have been delaying. With my A relapsing, there is no time like the present to really start taking care of myself. I need to make sure all my bases are covered, financially and with insurance, etc. My Grandson is due to arrive March 5th, I start...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi This is a womans question. I have started my changes, and have noticed I have a hair trigger temper. My moods go up and down and I do explode. I find myself apologizing all the time over the dumbest of things. I have been trying to see it coming, count to ten etc. but I have to admitt it has been getting...

Kim · Kim

Hello all: My computer was down for some time as we were working on the room. It is up and running now. I logged on today to check on the board and received three messages from friends here....thanks to you all for reaching out and checking on me......I really missed having...

sandie123 · sandie123

I got this email today and it really made sense to me and gave me something to think about... thought it might fit with others Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting. --Karl Wallenda In walking a tightrope, a person has to learn to relax while going fo...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Confused and Hurting (Preview) My A husband of 5 years left Monday night screaming at me. Sent an email that he wants a divorce. Have not heard from him since. I am unable to go to work, and am stressed about my job being there when I get back. Hub was court ordered into counseling which ins. will not pay for, and he can't afford the house pm...	Becky1	7	484	Feb 25, 2006 by iona54
	Little hints of cut downs last night (Preview) My alcoholic husband was actually doing okay for a couple of weeks. He was drinking, but he was not drunk or rude to me. Of course I could see the small changes last night and the cycle starting all over again. He must have been sitting in a bar for awhile yesterday while I was working. He's still laid off an...	Lindy	5	569	Feb 25, 2006 by maresie
	feeling crappy can be GOOD!!!! (Preview) Hope for Today - February 22 I found a carrot and two lumps of coal on my sidewalk and wondered what they were doing there. I thought it odd. Suddenly remembering that a snowman once stood on that place, I chuckled at my own suspicious thoughts. Even so, I had an eerie feeling of something st...	rosie light shines	6	360	Feb 25, 2006 by Robinks
	new, is this the place for me? Please read. (Preview) Hi everyone. I am just wondering if this is the right place for me. I will try to be brief. I am not with an alcoholic or addict, but with a mentally ill/personality disordered person, who used to use cocaine and alcohol but has not in many years. I am codependent and grew up with an abusive alcoholi...	codependentme	12	534	Feb 25, 2006 by Jayda
	prayer update (Preview) Just wanted to thank everyone for their prayers and to let you know that there is definitely a higher power. My friend is still with us for the time being and now has her husband by her side in the city. I spoke to him today and told him how much is wife loved him and that I knew he loved her just as...	leo	7	417	Feb 25, 2006 by leo
	Surrender (Preview) All I can do, is focus on me, control me & change me. Sad for this to be so difficult & guilt laden for us but it still takes me some work & hard focus some days, to just allow myself to consider my wants, needs & desires. It gets easier with practise, just like forgiveness. ...	kitty	4	511	Feb 25, 2006 by jrtjosey
	good news and a lesson from HP (Preview) Hello all: Yesterday my A had an appoinment with the gastoenterologist to get the results of his Hep C blood work. While he was in treatment he was given an antibody test that came back positive. Upon the confirmatory it was found to be NEGATIVE. Whic hwas great news. He wi...	Kim	1	427	Feb 25, 2006 by jrtjosey
	Prison (Preview) Someone in chat the other day said that they knew of a good group for Moms/families of prisoners. Does anyone remember who that was, or does anyone have any websites or groups they could recommend? Today is proving to be challenging. Thanks, Doxie	doxie	4	520	Feb 25, 2006 by Andrea12
	Welcome newcomers (Preview) I just wanted to say it is so nice to see so many new names here on the board and in chat. If you have questions here or there personal or technical don't be afraid to ask ask. You can ask them privately by clicking on any of our names and you will have the option to speak one on one. once aga...	jrtjosey	0	325	Feb 25, 2006 by jrtjosey
	hard to get into that morning routine when A husband is laying in bed hungover (Preview) Ok I really dont mind my son being home for school vacation. Dont need to get out the door 2.5hrs earlier than I leave for work to get him to the bus. However when I come downstairs and A husband is hungover in bed (we sleep separately) it really grinds on me! He calls in sick alot on Fridays. I cant get in ther...	Barbara	6	644	Feb 25, 2006 by Jeannie
	what would you do? (Preview) A couple of days ago I posted about my A relapsing. We have 2 small children (1&3) and I know one time for sure he came with beer after picking our son up from preschool. Two of the bottles were empty but he swore he poured them out on the way home because he felt bad for even buying it...	marcie301	6	541	Feb 25, 2006 by Jeannie
	chat room prayer (Preview) I heard that those in chat at somepoint yesterday said a group prayer for me and my family. All I can say is I heard about this while the caseworker was still at my house and couldn't even think about it anymore because I didn't want to be crying as soon as I talked to the caseworker. Thank you all so much...	bobump	4	2450	Feb 25, 2006 by mastiff
	Busy week (Preview) My house is finally finished. The landscapers finished today and the painters finished yesterday. My cabinets have been installed, the front door and interior doors have been replaced. I am too exhausted to enjoy it. My mother-in-law has kep the baby for two weeks while...	Powerless	4	357	Feb 25, 2006 by jrtjosey
	Not sure what to do - Advice? (Preview) The weekend is coming up, which means I will be going to my boyfriends'. He had recently quit drinking at the insistance of his father, whom he lives with. His father goes away sometimes on weekends and I stay at my bf's. Now that his father is away, I know he will want to get a bottle of...	paintthinnr	9	508	Feb 25, 2006 by maresie
	Nervous Breakdown - Self Care (Preview) This past week things have been coming to a head here. I discovered the 17 year old stepdaughter is smoking and had a bottle of vodka (big size) hidden in her drawer - her 21 year old sister has been buying the cigarettes for her, my 23 year old son bought one pack for her. The 17 year old is visi...	kismetstrand	13	811	Feb 25, 2006 by maresie
	I guess I just need some opinions..... (Preview) Last April my husband let me in on his secret problem with oxycontin and cocaine abuse. I knew something was up since so much money was missing. Although I didn't notice the symptoms of abuse since he always uses while drinking. I always thought he was drunk. Well it has been...	starangel	8	689	Feb 25, 2006 by Diva
	The Year of Me (Preview) I've known my a for 7 years. Right before the New Year, I told him all the time I've known you, the focus has been on you. It's going to be 7 years of the Year of Jill starting Jan 20056. He agreed (easy cuz nothing changes if...). Nearly the end of February, and it hit me, the focus is still on him. I have rece...	Jill	6	468	Feb 25, 2006 by Jill
	I took the risk (Preview) Well, after a 6 month separation, and a lot of soul searching and taking care of me I decided to take the risk and see how it goes, and told hubby on Friday that he could come home. As soon as I said it I thought oh god what have I set myself up for - I can see changes in him and as far as I am aware he has only had 1 sl...	Picowitch	7	482	Feb 25, 2006 by sandie123
	is this weird? (Preview) today is a bad day for me. no reason in paticular, but i just am worrying about my dad. i love him sooooo much!! i know that he loves me, too. but his drinking hurts me so much that i have detached myself from him. i refuse to support him and hold his hand while his life goes to sh*t. i wish i could jus...	flintfeet	3	511	Feb 25, 2006 by lin0606
	found book I was reading (Preview) Well I got a couple of the Getting Them Sober books--the first and fourth ones. I have been reading on them for the past few days. I ordered them a couple of weeks ago. Anyway--after a few more yucky days, he has decided again that he is through with the drugs--the last time "was enoug...	hudsond	3	505	Feb 24, 2006 by Christy
	Suddenly Life is again a seed (Preview) Suddenly Life is again a seed I am slipping further and further away from you For I do not know what else to do I am always feeling persistently blue Surrounded by darkness yearning for the light There is a tunnel ahead It calls my name It is time for me to go It is not you to blame ...	Lauren ashley	4	430	Feb 24, 2006 by Becky1
	Jesus Take the Wheel (Preview) This is a song by Carrie Underwood, and the lyrics fit so well what we alanon members need to do.....so here it is..I've been thinking about this song lately due to my current situation..I am powerless.... She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati On a snow white Christmas Eve Going ho...	Becky1	5	519	Feb 24, 2006 by Becky1
	suicide worries and AA (Preview) My sister in law advised me that my brother has threatened suicide three times this month, including today. She is scared and wants me to talk to him. I spoke with him regarding her concern. He told me that she violated confidentiality and that I should not worry. He told me t...	figaro	8	684	Feb 24, 2006 by Jeannie
	prayers please (Preview) Hi everyone, My very good friend is at the moment going through the final stages of her life as it is on this earth with cancer. She is in a lot of pain and now 1300kms away in the city away from family and friends. This lady lives with her husband (a drinker) who is not able to be by her side bec...	leo	7	627	Feb 24, 2006 by Jeannie
	Slogans? (Preview) I have heard much talk about slogans, but where do you find them/learn them? Anyone have any favorites?	paintthinnr	4	507	Feb 24, 2006 by kitty
	addicted to my A? (Preview) Well I noticed the funniest thing. When he calls me or texts me, I feel like a kind of justification and like I am really 'doing' something here for myself. When he doesn't I feel lonely and like 'what's the point?' Why the heck does what I am doing here in my own house have to hinge upon what he...	sweetums	3	491	Feb 24, 2006 by ashraven
	Detaching and Getting a Life (Preview) My husband is a recovering addict/alcoholic. He also struggles with chronic pain, and sometimes overuses his pain meds (in my opinion.) I try to "detach" from his slogged demeanor on those occassions, but it really bothers me to see him that way. It reminds me of when I was young and my dad was drunk. I f...	terascot	5	505	Feb 24, 2006 by ashraven
	Dolphin123 (Preview) Has anybody heard from Dolphin? Hugs Mary	marmare	0	366	Feb 24, 2006 by marmare
	Alcoholism, a merry-go-round named denial... (Preview) This is a pamphalet handed to me today at my first f2f meeting ever. I nearly burst into tears as I read this booklet written 4 years after I was born about what is happening in my life today. To all of you who kept saying get ye to a meeting.... THANK YOU! It was a steps meeting, but all I cou...	rtexas	3	3132	Feb 24, 2006 by kitty
	A small setback.. (Preview) A was "supposed" to come home today... I just called him and asked what time I should pick him up. He said Dr. wants him one more day. BP is back up and ammonia level in blood is rising again. Poor guy. The good thing is I can meet with my Sponsor, I always do on Thursdays and was not able to last week. ...	Christy	10	537	Feb 24, 2006 by gardengal
	Maybe he's full of S___! (Preview) Well, since what he said yesterday (what I wrote in my last post), I haven't heard from him again regarding it. But he did call my friend today and to her he sounded a bit annoyed. He wanted to know what I wanted to do, and she said that I didn't know, I was very confused. Then he said I was...	sdisnie	5	383	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	Now the hard part begins. (Preview) I have been reading and benefitting from everyone's post's since I found this site a few weeks ago but this is the first time I've posted. I attended f2f meetings a few years ago as I have several A's in my life. The one I have the biggest frustration with is my husband. He has been doing AA a...	marcie301	4	426	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	clean up my HEAD---clean up my SPACE (Preview) Clearing Your Space For Change In life, we tend to have an easier time acquiring possessions than we do getting rid of them. Just as we harbor emotional baggage that is difficult to let go of, our lives can tend to be filled with material objects that we may feel compelled to hold on to. Most...	rosie light shines	2	369	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	prayers pls, I must be making progress, (Preview) I must be making some progress. Cause I'm going to ask something that I normally would not reach out for. Tomorrow around 5pm eastern is the scheduled visit for dyfs (child services). If I could impose on anyone that would feel inclined to pray that I am doing god's work, that how I'm h...	bobump	9	459	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	Resentment & Retaliation (Preview) (((((Roomies)))))), I could really use some ES&H on this issue. I find that I really struggle both with resentments and the desire to retaliate if I feel injured by someone close to me. If I feel hurt, I tend to want to hurt back. The retaliations are "minor"--silent treatment, sulking, retrea...	BlueCloud	7	562	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	What CAN I control??? (Preview) So I"m not allowed to control my alcoholics. I'm not allowed to control the people around me. I can control my feelings and my actions. So I want to redecorate my house. However I live with 2 roommates. And for the alst 6 months I've been putting things off in order to make them happy. In the meantime we h...	Emafer	5	455	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	Detaching (Preview) Well I have spent the last two days in bed a lot because my house is freezing. The A has not arranged with the landlord the heating stuff he was supposed to. I really went all out before Christmas to get the landlord to agree to a new heater. The A is supposed to provide him a few simple measurements ca...	maresie	2	395	Feb 24, 2006 by maresie
	The bridge (Preview) Here is an interesting recovery parable I heard a story about a woman walking across a high bridge, on her journey. She saw someone coming to her but could not make anything out or who it was. As this person got closer she saw that he had something tied around his waist but again could not make out what...	megan	6	459	Feb 24, 2006 by whitie
	Heroes (Preview) amazingly, an Ozzy song.... Been around this world so many times If you could only see my mind I watch my secret heaven turn to hell Faith alone has guided me The ghost of my own destiny I haven’t even got a soul to sell All the thing I put me through I wouldn’t wish my hell on you Yo...	sweetums	1	448	Feb 23, 2006 by just me
	They told him my decision (Preview) Another sleepless night,doing the usual round of "what if's?" and brought myself up short by telling myself that I can spend days or weeks or months analysing where it's all gone wrong.....but the end result is I am where I am....I KNOW how I got here and no amount of "wishing things could have gone diff...	chris52	9	647	Feb 23, 2006 by aunitedway
	March 25 - Courage to Change (Preview) someone at last nights F2F read this page - I came to AlAnon confused about what was and was not my responsibility. Today after lots of Step work, I believe I am responsible for the following: to be loyal to my values, to please myself first, to keep an open mind, to detach with love, to rid myself of ange...	Barbara	1	2973	Feb 23, 2006 by aunitedway
	Amends? (Preview) I recently got chided by an AA friend for not letting an ex-boyfriend make amends to me. I explained that I have no communication with this person for a reason and just beucase they've been sober for 5 month is no reason for me to get all emotionally involved with someone that I don't see as having a lot to o...	Emafer	7	572	Feb 23, 2006 by Emafer
	He wants away from me now (Preview) After almost 9 years relationship, and 5 years of marriage, he wants out. The alcohol is in control. Last year, in Jan. there was an incident where he was out of control, and flinging his arms around, and accidentally hit my nose and caused it to bleed. I became hysterical, filed charges, his mot...	Becky1	6	643	Feb 23, 2006 by nmike
	One cut too deep....... (Preview) I know you hurt She looks at me with a blank stare I try to ignore it but I do care I like her I really do I just want her to like me and that is no lie Her icy blue eyes I can tell of the hurt she carries inside Hiding behind her beautiful hair buying material things But I know w...	Lauren ashley	9	506	Feb 23, 2006 by nmike
	Hubby coming home :) (Preview) My husband is being released tomorrow and is willing to do an out pt. rehab program along w/AA.. I've called the insurance company and got the names of several addiction specialists..the rest is up to him. I doubt he'll be going anywhere for at least a week as he is very sick and puny still. Because of the...	Christy	12	681	Feb 23, 2006 by gardengal
	O D A T So Thankful (Preview) I love the strength and energy that comes from this website. The chat rooms. The comaraderie of the people at the online meetings and the "shares." Very moving. There is this ((( energy ))) it comes rushing through....from a wonderful carin...	aunitedway	2	391	Feb 23, 2006 by chris52
	update (Preview) i speant the last week going to work and doing the things i loved and missing my a like crazy. he was calling me alot saying how he missed me but i told him to not call me unless he was gonna get back into aa. we didnt speak for a few days and i still went out and had fun. i didnt go back to my old thinking while i was o...	notsonew1111	4	390	Feb 23, 2006 by cdb
	Please pray for me (Preview) My a and I own our business together. I have put it on the market. Today I recieved an offer which we have verbally accepted. The contract will be faxed to me tomorrow for our signature. Then we must wait while the contingencies are met. If all goes well we will have the store so...	ditto	4	413	Feb 22, 2006 by Maria123
	Wanting to be ok either way (Preview) My a had 6 sober days. Honestly I was getting very excited--I know I know better, but I always hope too much! He had a couple of disappointments and now says f--- the world. He is just going to look out for himself. I haven't decided if this is all just huge pity party and his I'm going to show th...	hudsond	3	498	Feb 22, 2006 by Andrea12
	How do I get to Step 2? (Preview) I really want to move on to Step 2, but have am still having a real problem with the "God" stuff. How does one just "come to believe" in it? I believe in some sort of energy that connects all things, but it is dispassionate. It does not care for me or anyone. I want to move further i...	paintthinnr	5	531	Feb 22, 2006 by canadianguy
	How stupid can I be... (Preview) Topic of discussion last night was divorce... (or not) I find myself saying that since you don't think your drinking causes a problem here at the house, here are the things that I struggle with and blame on the alcohol. - You don't believe what I say I feel, how I see things happen or what my int...	rtexas	6	560	Feb 22, 2006 by canadianguy
	Division of Youth and Family Services to be called today (Preview) Well after my daughters pyschologist appt yesterday, he informed me that he is calling DYFS (might be called child protective services in your state) today. He started it off saying the my daughter is obviously not a happy camper and that she is happier when she is no thome. He said that he wasn't c...	bobump	11	629	Feb 22, 2006 by chris52
	anyone attending the AA w/AlAnon convention in NH in April? (Preview) Just wondering. I think the dates are April 21-23	Barbara	2	339	Feb 22, 2006 by Barbara
	thank you for responding/Eden (Preview) I read my post and it is screwed up. oh well. It was my brother who brought me the pretty stuff and called later to see if I was ok. yea that is what I mean by insanity. I still have hope he will care enough to help some. Just cannot believe how awful he has become. Well I dragged home water....	debilyn	2	429	Feb 22, 2006 by TLC2
	weird dreams... (Preview) i have been keeping busy lately and have not had much time to worry about my dad. but the past 2 nights i have had dreams about my A dad. here goes: *DREAM #1...*i am at my dad's house. it is a mess, beer cans everywhere, it smells, he got sick everywhere, and acts like nothing is wrong. i yell at him and he clos...	flintfeet	2	321	Feb 22, 2006 by marmare
	Hi everyone! (Preview) Well I am finally able to share some of my experiences on the message board! I sincerely enjoy reading all the things everyone has to say and find much solace in it. It is so good to know that I am not alone, and that my situation is far, far from being unique! My A is my boyfriend (ex??not sure yet). I have t...	sweetums	4	389	Feb 22, 2006 by Hopefloats
	So Many Changes (Preview) Well guys! I accepted the job I have been delaying. With my A relapsing, there is no time like the present to really start taking care of myself. I need to make sure all my bases are covered, financially and with insurance, etc. My Grandson is due to arrive March 5th, I start...	marmare	4	488	Feb 22, 2006 by leo
	Kind of personal and not really Alanon, but any advice would be appreciated. (Preview) Hi This is a womans question. I have started my changes, and have noticed I have a hair trigger temper. My moods go up and down and I do explode. I find myself apologizing all the time over the dumbest of things. I have been trying to see it coming, count to ten etc. but I have to admitt it has been getting...	Jeannie	12	594	Feb 22, 2006 by leo
	back from the dead (Preview) Hello all: My computer was down for some time as we were working on the room. It is up and running now. I logged on today to check on the board and received three messages from friends here....thanks to you all for reaching out and checking on me......I really missed having...	Kim	4	539	Feb 22, 2006 by hudsond
	Walking a Tightrope (Preview) *I got this email today and it really made sense to me and gave me something to think about... thought it might fit with others* Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting. --Karl Wallenda In walking a tightrope, a person has to learn to relax while going fo...	sandie123	2	380	Feb 22, 2006 by confused
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.