Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

horselover58 · horselover58

Happy moments, praise God Difficult moments, seek God Quiet moments, worship God Painful moments, trust God Every moment, thank God Debbie

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Even though he is out of my home I still feel like I am enabling. He makes me feel bad for him, I know this is part of the con the game. Since he can not drive right now he calls me for everything, take me to the Dr. take me to the dentist......I need to just say no....One day I actually did...but mostly I jus...

kitty · kitty

I know it is only me that I'm failing. It is difficult to admit, the weakness ~ physically especially, I always had that to fall back on. Most girls can't lift 100# easily... now since I fell ill last year & the totalling of my car, I am so atrophied & weak, it is frustrating &a...

abbyal · abbyal

IN THE EARLY YRS IN AL- ANON THE WORD SPIRITUAL AWAKENING USED TO CONFUSE ME ALOT I DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT IT WAS . THEN I FOUND A ONE LINER THAT SIMPLY SAID A SPIRITUAL AWAKENING WAS AS SIMPLE AS HAVING A CHANGE IN ATTITUDE. (AND SUPRISE SUPRISE I HAD ACTUALLY HAD A FEW . HEHE OUR CO FOUN...

kspear · kspear

Hello all, I have a question, which I suspect I know the answer to, but am going to ask nonetheless. Typically, I am not an emotional person (well, I suppose that's not entirely true, I do angry pretty well...). I guess what I mean is that I don't cry. Over the last few weeks, I hav...

justme · justme

The Hole One I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless... It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Two I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t belie...

bubbles1990 · bubbles1990

I know tomorrow is Mothers's Day and my kids are really special and I LOVE them with all my heart there is also a great sadness for my mom who killed herself 6 yrs ago and the pain of sadness I still feel knowing this dieases killed her!!!! I am finding that as the years pass and the more I am here in alanon that...

kitty · kitty

Do they burn out instantaneously or fade away slowly? I know you can see them from far away, that blue light they use at airports, so even a glint is enough, a tiny very hot spark. Turn inward to GOD, love, to learn to love myself & not feel the guilt of placing other's first... will it tak...

peewee · peewee

Hi there, It's great to come here and blow off steam. You don't even Have to listen, but I can pose a question to myself or anyone who cares to join in :) When hub gets fussy, interrrupts my talk, uptight, says close the door, fuss fuss, ewwwwwwwww, I get sarcastic, walk away, start sere...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

I have read in Alanon lit. that the spouses, parents, sibs, and children get so caught up in what the A is doing, their lives become unmanageable because the A and their behavior becomes their addiction and obsession. I obsess when my A has done something I don't like or if I have an issue I know I ne...

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, just checking in. Have heard people have been wondering where i was in the room so i thought i'd post real quick... I had surgery on the 10th, nothing serious, but nothing i wanted to share with the room with, kinda personal, and i didn't want to make everyone worry. They ha...

lilms · lilms

Today I was asked to share in a forum on joy versus happiness. This is my take. Every day at least once, maybe 3 or 4 times my other half asks me if I am happy. Often I need to answer no. Sometimes that is not possible given the situation that we are living with. Joy on the other hand, almost always. Jo...

megan · megan

Hello my friends old and new Yesterday marks 1 year since I left my A husband of 14 years. I have had such a good year of growth I just wanted to post and say how good my life has become. I have reconnected with my family. I traveled to the Netherlands to visit my...

mac57 · mac57

I wrote this in a share, in our mtg today; so i KNOW i didnt write it really, it was a gift to us, and so here it is: as i turn within myself it’s only love i find and as i find that love is true and that my love is mine my heart brings my joy to me and fills my ey...

gardengal · gardengal

I pose this question, as so many times, so many of us alanoners beat ourselves up for reacting to an A's actions. I know time after time, after the fact, I would sit and cry and wonder why I said and did the things I did. After years of being told I was crazy I started to beleive that I was, because of my actions...

kent_s · kent_s

I had a very unusual experience today. I had a deep insight into myself. I'm so tired now, it is hard to recall all my thoughts from this morning. I've been through so much today, all the relationships I touched on and places I had to go to, all the feelings and thoughts wore me out. I was in a weekly...

hudsond · hudsond

It has been a ride! I'm sure it isn't over, but I have been trying hard. My AH went back to drinking last week. He has been doing crack, but as he pointed out I get more upset about the alcohol than the drug. I don't think so, it's just that with the alcohol I can definitely know whe...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

in working the steps, i saw an entry in this workbook i am doing on step 3......i am paraphrasing below, what it said and it was a LIGHTBULB moment for me... WORKBOOK___________me- versus-them" thinking and how it keeps me immobilized. even in the way I relate to my Higher Power, parti...

Barbara · Barbara

Almost time to wake him up for school. Im sending him in due to the MCAS testing. Will get him out early to take him shopping. Its been a very fast 14 years. He's graduating from Middle School in just over 5weeks - been in the Honors program and will continue next year in the High School. Yup Im proud of him - H...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))), Tomorrow is National Live Strong Day. It is about supporting cancer survivors, and research. We are suppose to wear yellow and our Live Strong bands if we have any. As many of you know, I always sign my posts with Live Strong. I even have it on m...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello ((((Everyone)))) Thank you for all your replies to my posts during the past week or so. My emotions have been so up and down I have not felt able to reply as much I would like to normally. I stayed at the house Fri, my husband called just before I left work to say he had to go somewhere, wouldn't tak...

MrBlue42 · MrBlue42

Hi, Just wanted to make a short but very deserving post to all the mothers out there on Mother's Day. Thank You for all you do for everyone throughout the entire year!!! Moms deserve way more credit than what they get. I saw an articl...

mac57 · mac57

Dear Mom, You took me to the grocery store and let me touch the fish, You took me to the night time stars and let me make a wish, You took me to school and said, "You do not have to stay," You smiled at me in the hospital and said, "We'll find a way." And when the pain became too much you said, "P...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello ((((Friends))))), Yesterday was Mother's Day, and what a wonderful day that is.......Hope all you fabulous mothers had a great day...... Hub called yesterday said, hope you are having a nice Mothers Day......I said, it's a fine day....at first I thought it was sarcastic...once I l...

kspear · kspear

Good morning. Guess I woke in a bad spot today. My son is barking at everyone this morning with a vengeance and I just have no patience for it. Calling everyone a retard or telling them to shut up so he can lord over the living room and play video games, because God forbid he should get u...

kspear · kspear

I just wanted to quickly apologize for being "short" (not in length, but in attitude) on a post or 2 (replies to others, I believe). I've been stuffing instead of dealing and therefore things started coming out sideways and I quite unkind. My apologies to those who the replies were directed t...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

So far I have not caved and called him or sent him a text OR drove by his apartment OR any of his usual haunts. I have asked everyone to NOT tell me if they see him somewhere, to NOT bring up my name if they happen to bump into him. I am not coping well. I need to hear his voice! I need to touch him! I need to see h...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

Been doing a lot of reading this weekend because it is cool and felt like snuggling with the dogs under a blanket. As most of you know I seperated from my AH 6 weeks ago after 13 months in the program. I came in hell bent on learning how to live with it, and decided I couldn't for my kids sake. Now al...

search41 · search41

hi all the last time i posted was regarding my 18 yr old son needing to move in with my a, our 7 yr old son, and i, and talking about how i knew my a would never agree to it. i still havent told my a that my 18 yr old needs to move in with us, and i still know my a isnt going to agree with it. i am st...

serendipity · serendipity

thank you all for your comments and prayers. i am home for the night and back to dad's to stay tomarrow. i was really missing my kids today and they love mother's day and all the things they make themselves. love is incredible. as in dealing with the a and having to continuously remind myself of the...

peewee · peewee

Why? Prayers for all of us who believe we know the right , who have allowed the wrong to rule us. I knew I was right in some important issues raising son, allowed the dad to overrule when I knew he was wrong. I was not strong enough. I was raised with the mantra: Father know...

d53sjurne · d53sjurne

Upon looking around this site, I found a wealth of information on just about every aspect recovery from almost anything there is to recover from. It even has updated info on PTSD, including Hurricane Katrina, besides affects of trauma from most all sources and great links and 12 step progra...

nmike · nmike

Hi Friends, I am in a rural part of Arizona. I travel alot and may have the opportunity to attend an Alanon function. Can you lead me to anything that is going on this summer? You can answer me here or PM me. In support, Nancy -- Edited by nmike at 12:34, 2006-05-15

shep · shep

First, let me give you a little background before asking my question: My A daughter, in her 30's, lives in another city. She has been in rehab twice, has stayed sober for some fairly extended periods of time, but has had several dramatic relapses. When she starts drinking, she manages to handle...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Alanon Buddies))) I hope all you mom's had a great day yesterday with lots of appreciation, gratitude and love heaped on you. My day yesterday went fine up until a certain point. My Saturday with my mom and sis-in-law was much better. My mom made me a scrapbook off my bab...

angeleyes8462 · angeleyes8462

I wanted to wish all the mom's a Happy Mothers Day! I hope you all have a wonderful Day. I hope that it is filled with lots of magic and love. On my Mothers Day I have been taking the time to reflect. Reflect on my life. I try everyday to better myself for me since joining the program. I am learning to do the thin...

debilyn · debilyn

I did do what you'all suggested. However, Kent maybe you don't believe in guns. As far as the tv jive, I found that very hurtful. I am a woman, women are borned scared. Men have no idea how it feels to not feel safe anywhere. As women don' t know how men feel in certain circumstances. This is a ser...

confused · confused

I am once again amazed at how this program works. I was sharing at a meeting the other night about a situation I am faced with. I thought that the topic was "Say what you mean, mean what you say, and don't say it mean". I have been struggling with this, as I felt like I was not being heard,...

Goldie · Goldie

How do you grow up with an A, then marry one and expect to live thru it. When my A pushes my buttons, like showing up 3 hours late, cause he's been with his drinking buddies, my buttons get pushed. I watched my Mom do the same things for so many years; now it's like it's happ...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, As most of you know hub and I are seperated. Does the day ever come when the addict sees...gee I lost my family....I am not living there anymore. I am alone...... Wednesday took hub to Pittsburge to get leg checked. Dr gave him 50 darvacet, this morning he had 7 left....wow........

serendipity · serendipity

my father is dying. he and i had a crazy day yesterday. he tried to leave his house in his underware. he has been just wanting so badly to just die and it isn't happening in our time frame. i think he thought if he left the house we could go somewhere and then he'd be safe and could die. it was truly awful. we wou...

Karilynn · Karilynn

This is for my Mom (Toni as she was known) and for all my AlaMoms. Mom, Even though we can't be together because God called you home when I was only 19, I wanted to thank you for still being there for me. Your life was far from perfect, but it was you who taught me the lessons I use today. Thank you for sho...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi, A friend of mine sent me this in an email today. Though it is not Alanon, the message is so clear. Hp can easily be substituted for God.     &n...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I feel like unclaimed baggage.......... everyone has heard of others having baggage. Well I do not even want this baggage. I have a migraine big time. One of my worst abused dogs......... she did not like anyone but the two of us and a little girl. We had her since she was 2 months old. Her name was T...

nails · nails

Hi folks. Im nails & my husband is an alcoholic and our relationship is dying. I am 7 months pregnant and I love him and my two step kids. I dont want to give up on our life together but I feel so broken and desperate. I am starting to hate him. Please let me know where I should properly start this an...

sandie123 · sandie123

My mind is overflowing with information and thoughts from a meeting. I am, once more, having new thoughts and ideas. What I am struggling with is the difference between TRUST and FAITH. These are both new feelings for me which I am trying to figure out. I feel t...

wanderlust · wanderlust

I am so fed up with my husband right now I could scream. He drinks 1/2 bottle of vodka a day. It usually starts around 6pm at night, and he gets so beligerent and unreasonable I feel as though we have no relationship left. Since evenings were our time to re connect, talk, watch TV together, etc. this is now g...

debilyn · debilyn

you guys something bad is happening. When I went to the doctor last thursday I was being followed by a new durango. I thought I was over reacting. But I got lost in that city suburb thing and was back tracking and he was behind me. Just sorta forgot about it. Thought maybe I was seeing a different vehic...

richard · richard

Well, I have helped my son financially on more time. Only this time, I told him that, that night was an eye opener for me. I told him he needs to learn to be self-supportive and not lean on me for financial support. I told him this is the last time I help him financially. He said he...

marmare · marmare

As I started thinking of Mother's Day, I started thinking of everyday. We all hear "one day at a time" but do we follow with what it means. Most of you know this is most likely my last mother's day with my mother. Everytime I see her, talk to her, or think of her, my heart is filled with lo...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

(((((Everyone))))) Today was so incrediblely beautiful. 75 degree w/ the most beautiful Carolina blue sky. I'm sitting here reflecting on why it has been a good day and I've discovered I'm back in the moment. Aaaaahhh, I'm lov'n it too. Today I didn't run from my...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I know some of you know who the fly lady is, thought I would share this Food For Thought from Her. It can be applied with what we are suppose to do in our program. Moving in May isn't about parking a little further out at Wal-Mart and logging on a few extra steps on your pedometer. Nor is it jus...

Miranda · Miranda

I don't know what to do. My little brother started having seizures the other day and got sent to the Children's Hospital. The neurologist did tests on him and my brother didn't do very well. The doctor said he might be physically and/or mentally handicapped. I'm so scared. My mom is being terrible she'...

smpoli · smpoli

Thank you all for the support you have all given me during this hard time. For those of you that know me and my situation, here is the latest update. Bryon went in Monday for his regular scheduled overnight chemo treatment. They were preparing his discharge Tue when he spiked a fever.&n...

tippergirl · tippergirl

My sponsor gave me a really nice compliment. She said she was very proud of me and that she could tell that I was willing to go to any length necesary in order to gain recovery. That was great to hear. So I went to two al-anon meetings today. One I sahred and the other I didn't. I was glad I didn't share in the se...

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

OH my A.... I went to his house yesterday at noon to get my things, before I left he followed me out to my car and kissed me, told me he does love me and told me to please come back at 2:30 when he was sure the electrician and cable guy would be gone. I went back. His first words, "Jennifer, I just think we nee...

Barbara · Barbara

I have the readings up to Step 5. Sponsor is bringing me Steps 6 & 7 tomorrow. Does anyone have the Big Book readings for the remaining steps?

jennneeefffurrr · jennneeefffurrr

My A has not phoned at all since yesterday. I guess I could be relieved that he is possibly out of my life forever and I will never have to deal with the insanity of alcoholism again, believe me, if I EVER encounter another A, I will leave them in the dust! I am not relieved, I am trying so desperately to be s...

DanaAngel · DanaAngel

Here's some funny real church bulletins (with typos) someone sent me, so I thought I'd share them with the board just for fun- Church Bulletins:The Fasting & Prayer Conference will include meals.The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight:"Searching for Jesus....

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanoners, I am spending the weekend doing errands with my AH who I am separated from. It never goes well. I get in my love addict/dysfunction/disease right away. My AH threatens divorce and says he is ready to start dating etc. He says when am I going to let go? When I am ready I say. With or wit...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Simple reminders (Preview) Happy moments, praise God Difficult moments, seek God Quiet moments, worship God Painful moments, trust God Every moment, thank God Debbie	horselover58	7	474	May 18, 2006 by mel123
	Why can't I stop Enabling?? (Preview) Even though he is out of my home I still feel like I am enabling. He makes me feel bad for him, I know this is part of the con the game. Since he can not drive right now he calls me for everything, take me to the Dr. take me to the dentist......I need to just say no....One day I actually did...but mostly I jus...	Andrea12	6	863	May 17, 2006 by mac57
	feeling like I'm failing (Preview) I know it is only me that I'm failing. It is difficult to admit, the weakness ~ physically especially, I always had that to fall back on. Most girls can't lift 100# easily... now since I fell ill last year & the totalling of my car, I am so atrophied & weak, it is frustrating &a...	kitty	18	775	May 17, 2006 by mac57
	SPIRITUALITY WHAT DOES IT REALLY MEAN? (Preview) IN THE EARLY YRS IN AL- ANON THE WORD SPIRITUAL AWAKENING USED TO CONFUSE ME ALOT I DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT IT WAS . THEN I FOUND A ONE LINER THAT SIMPLY SAID A SPIRITUAL AWAKENING WAS AS SIMPLE AS HAVING A CHANGE IN ATTITUDE. (AND SUPRISE SUPRISE I HAD ACTUALLY HAD A FEW . HEHE OUR CO FOUN...	abbyal	6	575	May 17, 2006 by gardengal
	Question (Preview) Hello all, I have a question, which I suspect I know the answer to, but am going to ask nonetheless. Typically, I am not an emotional person (well, I suppose that's not entirely true, I do angry pretty well...). I guess what I mean is that I don't cry. Over the last few weeks, I hav...	kspear	3	541	May 17, 2006 by Jennifer
	I found the poem- "The Hole" check it out (Preview) The Hole One I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost ... I am helpless... It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out. Two I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t belie...	justme	7	1803	May 17, 2006 by justme
	My Mothers Day Lessons...... (Preview) I know tomorrow is Mothers's Day and my kids are really special and I LOVE them with all my heart there is also a great sadness for my mom who killed herself 6 yrs ago and the pain of sadness I still feel knowing this dieases killed her!!!! I am finding that as the years pass and the more I am here in alanon that...	bubbles1990	9	535	May 17, 2006 by peewee
	Blue Flames (Preview) Do they burn out instantaneously or fade away slowly? I know you can see them from far away, that blue light they use at airports, so even a glint is enough, a tiny very hot spark. Turn inward to GOD, love, to learn to love myself & not feel the guilt of placing other's first... will it tak...	kitty	3	468	May 17, 2006 by peewee
	Snit, serenity for whom? (Preview) Hi there, It's great to come here and blow off steam. You don't even Have to listen, but I can pose a question to myself or anyone who cares to join in :) When hub gets fussy, interrrupts my talk, uptight, says close the door, fuss fuss, ewwwwwwwww, I get sarcastic, walk away, start sere...	peewee	4	474	May 17, 2006 by kent_s
	Instead of lying down I stood up for me (Preview) I have read in Alanon lit. that the spouses, parents, sibs, and children get so caught up in what the A is doing, their lives become unmanageable because the A and their behavior becomes their addiction and obsession. I obsess when my A has done something I don't like or if I have an issue I know I ne...	twinmom2	9	658	May 17, 2006 by April306
	Hi all Yes, lol I'm alive (Preview) Hi all, just checking in. Have heard people have been wondering where i was in the room so i thought i'd post real quick... I had surgery on the 10th, nothing serious, but nothing i wanted to share with the room with, kinda personal, and i didn't want to make everyone worry. They ha...	mastiff	7	595	May 17, 2006 by aunitedway
	Happiness versus JOY (Preview) Today I was asked to share in a forum on joy versus happiness. This is my take. Every day at least once, maybe 3 or 4 times my other half asks me if I am happy. Often I need to answer no. Sometimes that is not possible given the situation that we are living with. Joy on the other hand, almost always. Jo...	lilms	3	3317	May 17, 2006 by tea2
	One year of growth (Preview) Hello my friends old and new Yesterday marks 1 year since I left my A husband of 14 years. I have had such a good year of growth I just wanted to post and say how good my life has become. I have reconnected with my family. I traveled to the Netherlands to visit my...	megan	12	1409	May 17, 2006 by leo
	a little poem by mac (Preview) I wrote this in a share, in our mtg today; so i KNOW i didnt write it really, it was a gift to us, and so here it is: as i turn within myself it’s only love i find and as i find that love is true and that my love is mine my heart brings my joy to me and fills my ey...	mac57	19	744	May 17, 2006 by kitty
	Question? Do you like yourself and can you make mistakes without getting angry at yourself, realizing that you are human? (Preview) I pose this question, as so many times, so many of us alanoners beat ourselves up for reacting to an A's actions. I know time after time, after the fact, I would sit and cry and wonder why I said and did the things I did. After years of being told I was crazy I started to beleive that I was, because of my actions...	gardengal	7	519	May 16, 2006 by mebjk
	I want to share something (Preview) I had a very unusual experience today. I had a deep insight into myself. I'm so tired now, it is hard to recall all my thoughts from this morning. I've been through so much today, all the relationships I touched on and places I had to go to, all the feelings and thoughts wore me out. I was in a weekly...	kent_s	8	858	May 16, 2006 by kent_s
	New beginnings (Preview) It has been a ride! I'm sure it isn't over, but I have been trying hard. My AH went back to drinking last week. He has been doing crack, but as he pointed out I get more upset about the alcohol than the drug. I don't think so, it's just that with the alcohol I can definitely know whe...	hudsond	4	575	May 16, 2006 by Andrea12
	for those of us who have trouble "giving up" to anything (Preview) in working the steps, i saw an entry in this workbook i am doing on step 3......i am paraphrasing below, what it said and it was a LIGHTBULB moment for me... WORKBOOK___________me- versus-them" thinking and how it keeps me immobilized. even in the way I relate to my Higher Power, parti...	rosie light shines	4	668	May 16, 2006 by twinmom2
	My baby turns 14 today (Preview) Almost time to wake him up for school. Im sending him in due to the MCAS testing. Will get him out early to take him shopping. Its been a very fast 14 years. He's graduating from Middle School in just over 5weeks - been in the Honors program and will continue next year in the High School. Yup Im proud of him - H...	Barbara	6	523	May 16, 2006 by megan
	National Live Strong Day (Preview) ((((((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))), Tomorrow is National Live Strong Day. It is about supporting cancer survivors, and research. We are suppose to wear yellow and our Live Strong bands if we have any. As many of you know, I always sign my posts with Live Strong. I even have it on m...	Karilynn	3	512	May 16, 2006 by megan
	fear and detachment (Preview) Hello ((((Everyone)))) Thank you for all your replies to my posts during the past week or so. My emotions have been so up and down I have not felt able to reply as much I would like to normally. I stayed at the house Fri, my husband called just before I left work to say he had to go somewhere, wouldn't tak...	Jennifer	3	577	May 16, 2006 by Jennifer
	To All the Moms (Preview) Hi, Just wanted to make a short but very deserving post to all the mothers out there on Mother's Day. Thank You for all you do for everyone throughout the entire year!!! Moms deserve way more credit than what they get. I saw an articl...	MrBlue42	10	538	May 16, 2006 by mel123
	To Mom (Preview) Dear Mom, You took me to the grocery store and let me touch the fish, You took me to the night time stars and let me make a wish, You took me to school and said, "You do not have to stay," You smiled at me in the hospital and said, "We'll find a way." And when the pain became too much you said, "P...	mac57	10	784	May 16, 2006 by mel123
	Maybe (Preview) Hello ((((Friends))))), Yesterday was Mother's Day, and what a wonderful day that is.......Hope all you fabulous mothers had a great day...... Hub called yesterday said, hope you are having a nice Mothers Day......I said, it's a fine day....at first I thought it was sarcastic...once I l...	Andrea12	4	621	May 15, 2006 by abbyal
	Tired and angry today (Preview) Good morning. Guess I woke in a bad spot today. My son is barking at everyone this morning with a vengeance and I just have no patience for it. Calling everyone a retard or telling them to shut up so he can lord over the living room and play video games, because God forbid he should get u...	kspear	4	513	May 15, 2006 by just me
	Apology (Preview) I just wanted to quickly apologize for being "short" (not in length, but in attitude) on a post or 2 (replies to others, I believe). I've been stuffing instead of dealing and therefore things started coming out sideways and I quite unkind. My apologies to those who the replies were directed t...	kspear	2	549	May 15, 2006 by bubbles1990
	Cannot Cope...I need to hear him, feel him, be close (Preview) So far I have not caved and called him or sent him a text OR drove by his apartment OR any of his usual haunts. I have asked everyone to NOT tell me if they see him somewhere, to NOT bring up my name if they happen to bump into him. I am not coping well. I need to hear his voice! I need to touch him! I need to see h...	jennneeefffurrr	7	650	May 15, 2006 by justme
	If I could have fixed me first. (Preview) Been doing a lot of reading this weekend because it is cool and felt like snuggling with the dogs under a blanket. As most of you know I seperated from my AH 6 weeks ago after 13 months in the program. I came in hell bent on learning how to live with it, and decided I couldn't for my kids sake. Now al...	jrtjosey	12	817	May 15, 2006 by justme
	prayers still needed (Preview) hi all the last time i posted was regarding my 18 yr old son needing to move in with my a, our 7 yr old son, and i, and talking about how i knew my a would never agree to it. i still havent told my a that my 18 yr old needs to move in with us, and i still know my a isnt going to agree with it. i am st...	search41	6	556	May 15, 2006 by search41
	thanks y'all (Preview) thank you all for your comments and prayers. i am home for the night and back to dad's to stay tomarrow. i was really missing my kids today and they love mother's day and all the things they make themselves. love is incredible. as in dealing with the a and having to continuously remind myself of the...	serendipity	5	480	May 15, 2006 by peewee
	Who is right? Who is strong? (Preview) Why? Prayers for all of us who believe we know the right , who have allowed the wrong to rule us. I knew I was right in some important issues raising son, allowed the dad to overrule when I knew he was wrong. I was not strong enough. I was raised with the mantra: Father know...	peewee	7	620	May 15, 2006 by peewee
	Wealth of info,PTSD,self-esteem, recovery,addictions,etc. (Preview) Upon looking around this site, I found a wealth of information on just about every aspect recovery from almost anything there is to recover from. It even has updated info on PTSD, including Hurricane Katrina, besides affects of trauma from most all sources and great links and 12 step progra...	d53sjurne	3	650	May 15, 2006 by peewee
	Arizona Alanon Retreats, Weekends, etc?? (Preview) Hi Friends, I am in a rural part of Arizona. I travel alot and may have the opportunity to attend an Alanon function. Can you lead me to anything that is going on this summer? You can answer me here or PM me. In support, Nancy -- Edited by nmike at 12:34, 2006-05-15	nmike	1	2916	May 15, 2006 by david62
	How Much Detachment for A Daughter (Preview) First, let me give you a little background before asking my question: My A daughter, in her 30's, lives in another city. She has been in rehab twice, has stayed sober for some fairly extended periods of time, but has had several dramatic relapses. When she starts drinking, she manages to handle...	shep	5	612	May 15, 2006 by tippergirl
	My thoughts and feelings are racing today (Preview) (((Hello Alanon Buddies))) I hope all you mom's had a great day yesterday with lots of appreciation, gratitude and love heaped on you. My day yesterday went fine up until a certain point. My Saturday with my mom and sis-in-law was much better. My mom made me a scrapbook off my bab...	twinmom2	2	889	May 15, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Happy Mothers Day (Preview) I wanted to wish all the mom's a Happy Mothers Day! I hope you all have a wonderful Day. I hope that it is filled with lots of magic and love. On my Mothers Day I have been taking the time to reflect. Reflect on my life. I try everyday to better myself for me since joining the program. I am learning to do the thin...	angeleyes8462	3	492	May 15, 2006 by seachange
	Thankyou (Preview) I did do what you'all suggested. However, Kent maybe you don't believe in guns. As far as the tv jive, I found that very hurtful. I am a woman, women are borned scared. Men have no idea how it feels to not feel safe anywhere. As women don' t know how men feel in certain circumstances. This is a ser...	debilyn	5	614	May 15, 2006 by hudsond
	not being heard..or.. trying to control the response WOW< is our disease manipulative or what? (Preview) I am once again amazed at how this program works. I was sharing at a meeting the other night about a situation I am faced with. I thought that the topic was "Say what you mean, mean what you say, and don't say it mean". I have been struggling with this, as I felt like I was not being heard,...	confused	4	966	May 15, 2006 by kent_s
	Pushing my Buttons (Preview) How do you grow up with an A, then marry one and expect to live thru it. When my A pushes my buttons, like showing up 3 hours late, cause he's been with his drinking buddies, my buttons get pushed. I watched my Mom do the same things for so many years; now it's like it's happ...	Goldie	2	530	May 14, 2006 by nmike
	The Insanity of it All (Preview) Hello Friends, As most of you know hub and I are seperated. Does the day ever come when the addict sees...gee I lost my family....I am not living there anymore. I am alone...... Wednesday took hub to Pittsburge to get leg checked. Dr gave him 50 darvacet, this morning he had 7 left....wow........	Andrea12	4	626	May 14, 2006 by Lexie
	feeling sad (Preview) my father is dying. he and i had a crazy day yesterday. he tried to leave his house in his underware. he has been just wanting so badly to just die and it isn't happening in our time frame. i think he thought if he left the house we could go somewhere and then he'd be safe and could die. it was truly awful. we wou...	serendipity	6	671	May 14, 2006 by Lexie
	For Toni (My Mom) (Preview) This is for my Mom (Toni as she was known) and for all my AlaMoms. Mom, Even though we can't be together because God called you home when I was only 19, I wanted to thank you for still being there for me. Your life was far from perfect, but it was you who taught me the lessons I use today. Thank you for sho...	Karilynn	9	685	May 14, 2006 by Lexie
	Survivor (Preview) *Hi,* *A friend of mine sent me this in an email today. Though it is not Alanon, the message is so clear. Hp can easily be substituted for God.* *    &n...*	Jeannie	3	557	May 14, 2006 by drucilla06
	unclaimed baggage/ damaged goods repairs under construction. (Preview) I feel like unclaimed baggage.......... everyone has heard of others having baggage. Well I do not even want this baggage. I have a migraine big time. One of my worst abused dogs......... she did not like anyone but the two of us and a little girl. We had her since she was 2 months old. Her name was T...	hmrnrnmm	1	462	May 14, 2006 by Jennifer
	Hi Im new , what do I do? (Preview) Hi folks. Im nails & my husband is an alcoholic and our relationship is dying. I am 7 months pregnant and I love him and my two step kids. I dont want to give up on our life together but I feel so broken and desperate. I am starting to hate him. Please let me know where I should properly start this an...	nails	8	653	May 14, 2006 by peewee
	Trust and Faith (Preview) My mind is overflowing with information and thoughts from a meeting. I am, once more, having new thoughts and ideas. What I am struggling with is the difference between TRUST and FAITH. These are both new feelings for me which I am trying to figure out. I feel t...	sandie123	6	496	May 14, 2006 by drucilla06
	New at this and need help! (Preview) I am so fed up with my husband right now I could scream. He drinks 1/2 bottle of vodka a day. It usually starts around 6pm at night, and he gets so beligerent and unreasonable I feel as though we have no relationship left. Since evenings were our time to re connect, talk, watch TV together, etc. this is now g...	wanderlust	9	618	May 14, 2006 by wanderlust
	what do you think? (Preview) you guys something bad is happening. When I went to the doctor last thursday I was being followed by a new durango. I thought I was over reacting. But I got lost in that city suburb thing and was back tracking and he was behind me. Just sorta forgot about it. Thought maybe I was seeing a different vehic...	debilyn	9	920	May 14, 2006 by drucilla06
	An update on my son and me... (Preview) Well, I have helped my son financially on more time. Only this time, I told him that, that night was an eye opener for me. I told him he needs to learn to be self-supportive and not lean on me for financial support. I told him this is the last time I help him financially. He said he...	richard	4	590	May 14, 2006 by aunitedway
	Mother's Day (Preview) As I started thinking of Mother's Day, I started thinking of everyday. We all hear "one day at a time" but do we follow with what it means. Most of you know this is most likely my last mother's day with my mother. Everytime I see her, talk to her, or think of her, my heart is filled with lo...	marmare	3	491	May 14, 2006 by drucilla06
	A Beautiful Day (Preview) (((((Everyone))))) Today was so incrediblely beautiful. 75 degree w/ the most beautiful Carolina blue sky. I'm sitting here reflecting on why it has been a good day and I've discovered I'm back in the moment. Aaaaahhh, I'm lov'n it too. Today I didn't run from my...	Lunamoth	3	480	May 14, 2006 by aunitedway
	Get Moving in May - Fly Lady - sorry guys (Preview) I know some of you know who the fly lady is, thought I would share this Food For Thought from Her. It can be applied with what we are suppose to do in our program. Moving in May isn't about parking a little further out at Wal-Mart and logging on a few extra steps on your pedometer. Nor is it jus...	jrtjosey	10	1148	May 14, 2006 by maresie
	Help!!! (Preview) I don't know what to do. My little brother started having seizures the other day and got sent to the Children's Hospital. The neurologist did tests on him and my brother didn't do very well. The doctor said he might be physically and/or mentally handicapped. I'm so scared. My mom is being terrible she'...	Miranda	7	513	May 14, 2006 by Miranda
	Bryon Update (Preview) Thank you all for the support you have all given me during this hard time. For those of you that know me and my situation, here is the latest update. Bryon went in Monday for his regular scheduled overnight chemo treatment. They were preparing his discharge Tue when he spiked a fever.&n...	smpoli	13	540	May 14, 2006 by leo
	willing to go any lengths (Preview) My sponsor gave me a really nice compliment. She said she was very proud of me and that she could tell that I was willing to go to any length necesary in order to gain recovery. That was great to hear. So I went to two al-anon meetings today. One I sahred and the other I didn't. I was glad I didn't share in the se...	tippergirl	3	570	May 14, 2006 by confused
	More issues than alcohol (Preview) OH my A.... I went to his house yesterday at noon to get my things, before I left he followed me out to my car and kissed me, told me he does love me and told me to please come back at 2:30 when he was sure the electrician and cable guy would be gone. I went back. His first words, "Jennifer, I just think we nee...	jennneeefffurrr	4	662	May 13, 2006 by sarahlm
	Does anyone have a list of what AA Big Book readings go with each step? (Preview) I have the readings up to Step 5. Sponsor is bringing me Steps 6 & 7 tomorrow. Does anyone have the Big Book readings for the remaining steps?	Barbara	4	675	May 13, 2006 by sarahlm
	Shambles, Devastation, Confusion, HOPE?? (Preview) My A has not phoned at all since yesterday. I guess I could be relieved that he is possibly out of my life forever and I will never have to deal with the insanity of alcoholism again, believe me, if I EVER encounter another A, I will leave them in the dust! I am not relieved, I am trying so desperately to be s...	jennneeefffurrr	4	481	May 13, 2006 by sunny123
	Church bulletins- some humor for the board! (Preview) Here's some funny real church bulletins (with typos) someone sent me, so I thought I'd share them with the board just for fun- Church Bulletins:The Fasting & Prayer Conference will include meals.The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight:"Searching for Jesus....	DanaAngel	5	470	May 13, 2006 by aunitedway
	The gift I give myself (Preview) Hi Alanoners, I am spending the weekend doing errands with my AH who I am separated from. It never goes well. I get in my love addict/dysfunction/disease right away. My AH threatens divorce and says he is ready to start dating etc. He says when am I going to let go? When I am ready I say. With or wit...	nmike	3	457	May 13, 2006 by Andrea12
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.