Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Rita G · Rita G

Sometimes I wish I could be one of those people are so unaffected by emotions - sometimes that just seems so tempting. . . As I have posted before, our daughter, an addict, got out of rehab last Thursday, this week she has already returned to old behaviors. Self-diagnosing herself with pneumo...

Tony · Tony

Well after trying to receive love from her for over 2 years, I am done. I cannot mainly believe that first year of what I thought was bliss and almost perfection has turned into THIS; however it has, and I accept that. I realize now the woman whom I fell in love with never existed. She was a facade creat...

txmom · txmom

Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow Today is the tomorrow I worried about yesterday. And today was such a lovely day, that I wondered why I worried about today yesterday. So today I am not going to worry about tomorrow. There may not be a tomorrow anyway. So today I am going to live as if there is no tomor...

kerry5 · kerry5

THIS IS AN ACTUAL INCIDENT On the last day before Christmas, I hurried to go to the supermarket to buy the remaining of the gift I didn't manage to buy earlier. When I saw all the people there, I started to complain to myself: "It is going to take forever here and I still have so many other places to go..." "C...

AlaMom · AlaMom

I heard a great line tonight on a talk show. Ironically enough the show was about damaged relationships between fathers and daughters. There are no coincidences just "God"incidences. The line is "Pain is the expectation of control". How true this can be for those of us...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Everyone))) Some good news on the board today... guess I'll share mine. I finally made a decision to get off my butt and start a side business. I have held a Cosmotology license for a long time and have worked in salons making part time money. I did a business cours...

abbyal · abbyal

Ok this is driving me nuts , someone who comes in the room has thier closing out statement as the 3 L's ------------ but have listed 4. soooooooooooo i never really thought of myself as a perfectionist and I try to mind my own business most days . But that is driving me nuts !!!!!!!!!! O...

vangellic · vangellic

I need to talk with someone and decided to log in to this message board for some comfort......... maybe someone out there might know or has also been diagnosed with liver damage and is going through the final stages. I live with an alcoholic (I am not) that has just been diagnosed with no li...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

whether traveling, or staying home! ....I hope those of you who are home near the computer, check in for those who are struggling to make it through this holiday. For me, the fourth of July was and has been the #1 Flashback holiday (for post-traumatic stress syndrome ...

annmarie · annmarie

I've spent many years trying to get to the stage where I could actually admit I was powerless over alcohol, and that my life had become unmanageable. I think the main problem was that I always assumed that I was in the midst of other people's problems. Problems caused by As in my life as I saw it. And be...

sisdragonfly1957 · sisdragonfly1957

Told my ex/bf that I didn't want to see him any more. 2 weeks ago today. I wrote him a letter yesterday telling him a few more things that didn't get said. Haven't seen or heard from him in 2 weeks and I'm staying so sad and depressed. I guess I thought he would try and see me. Told him that if he decided that he d...

lilms · lilms

Just a quick note to say thank you to Abby for providing me with a

lightbulb moment. From now on I will enjoy the silences that occur in my household when my other half has her knickers in a knot. I will put on the music and dance, I will watch a show I enjoy on the television, I will no long...

allison · allison

talked to a sober husband last night and this morning.He has joined AA and has a sponser.He sounds better than he has in a long time.I know better than to get my hopes up too high but I hope for his sake,my sake,and our childrens sake this helps.I miss the man I married and want him home again.But I know I can...

sandie123 · sandie123

I'm still dealing with my family vacation loaded with lots of alcohol. I tried getting to a meeting yesterday (the only one I could make) and it was cancelled. I was so looking forward to it. This weekend is the BIG party. I know I need to detach. I also just found out my husband just got his 4th DUI. I st...

Robinks · Robinks

how did your court go yesterday? I said a big prayer for you. robin

dori · dori

Hi, I was scanning down the posts rereading some and I came across yours and I read what you wrote about the next time you call the police or take the keys in the honor of my sister. That is the nicest thing any one has done for me inm along time it made me cry of joy thank you . dori

nmike · nmike

Our son was home on his 2 week leave. He left last Sat to go back into combat in Iraq. Although my AH and I are separated, we came together to greet our son and do whatever it took to help him enjoy a respite from his daily life. He saw his grandmothers and cousins and and brother and played with the babies he ha...

sandie123 · sandie123

Well, here I am on "vacation" trying so hard to keep the focus on ME. It is a family vacation filled with all sorts of the disease. I am having such a hard time with the discussions and situations. I feel so bad for my kids having to deal and listen to all this 'diseased talk' when they are having such a hard ti...

hersh · hersh

Hi everyone: I guess I just need some validation for my feelings! Things with my mom have been strained our whole lives. She left us when I was 14 years old, drank heavily then and pretty much never stayed in touch with us (my father raised us). Though she drinks rarely now,...

meowpur · meowpur

Hi: I'm Barbara. I'm new here and have only posted once. I am having a hard time with people. I think I'll become a non people. My husband is not speaking to me. We had a fight 3 days ago. I kept it from esculating into a screaming match by using tec...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

I feel like I'm at the end of my rope with the A. All week he has been extremely angry and manipulative. First it was about buying a guitar and angry because we didn't have the money for him to continue putting it on lay-a-way. Then he was angry because he thought I was telling him he cou...

phoebemoonpie · phoebemoonpie

Hi, kind people. I posted here many months ago about the destruction of my marriage due to this disease. My ex husband and I were using addicts / alcoholics for years together. The birth of our daughter (born addicted) finally brought me to sobriety. I stopped seeing him when sh...

AlaMom · AlaMom

is not always a terrible thing to do. I have posted a couple of times about the situation of my father moving very far away. Two days ago I was all over the map emotionally but didnt even realize it. It wasnt until after I raged at my husband and said some very hurtful things that I reali...

gardengal · gardengal

Living with an alcoholic seriously affects our feels of self worth. We get sick. We suffer from guilt thinking that we caused the problem, and and we sit at home or at work in worry and fear, anxiety and stress. This makes us sicker. We hold things in and let if fester and grow within us, and our reactions t...

daisygirly · daisygirly

Hi...I really want to join in on the chat room but the chat room is coming up when I open the page. Everything else opens on the page execpt where the chat should be going on it's just an empty black box. Anyone have any ideas why this is happening and how I can fix it..??? thanks!

evey · evey

Hi, I posted a couple of weeks ago about my AH almost dying due to alcohol poisoning and how I confronted him after it in a liquor store. He agreed to go to rehab and he has been there for 5 days.Hate to say it, but I have gotten more done in these 5 days than I have in 6 months. I did see a...

Gailey · Gailey

One of mine is sitting in my recliner alone in the early morning while drinking my coffee and watching the hummingbirds outside my window eating from my feeder. Those little birds are so amazing to me. What's yours?

Barbara · Barbara

Yikes spoke with my mother the other day and now my younger brother who is back in court July 27th lost his part time gas station job! He came to work two hours late - his boss said he gave him enough chances and let him go. He knew he had to "keep his back clean" and now he's done this?! My mother is afraid he'll...

Powerless · Powerless

I found out that I am pregnant and due March 05, 2007. I am a little excited, but mostly terrfied. I can't think of a more irresponsible thing to do. My oldest daughter lives with her dad, I can't afford the two that live with us. My husband is finally getting clean and working a...

jajanma · jajanma

What are some of the ways you all deal with the money thing? I have become an expert at hiding money, but doing that makes me feel sick, because he is always calling me a liar, and I guess that makes him right, but I don't know how else to deal with it. I am just starting back to work again after 3 years of stayin...

smub · smub

I am posting here for the first time. I really need to vent..otherwise I will think about all this all day and it will impact everything I do today (it is only 7 am now!)..and maybe I will even lose my mind more. My husband of 5 1/2 years is an active alcoholic. I knew from the first month toge...

txmom · txmom

A Life Lesson From A Mule A parable is told of a farmer who owned an old mule. The mule fell into the farmer's well. The farmer heard the mule braying. After carefully assessing the situation, the farmer sympathized with the mule, but decided that neither the mule nor the well was worth the trouble o...

Dolphin123 · Dolphin123

Hi Roomies, I just logged back on and the baord is fixed, the posts are now in order of start date!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ty for fixing it Webmaster!

Lanchas · Lanchas

I have great news. I now have 3 jobs! I work at Mano's with sporadic hours making $5/hr + tips. I work at Arby's with currently unknown hours but making $6.75/hr. I work at Byrne Dairy my first night is tomorrow 5pm-12am making $6.75/hr. I'm so excited! My hope of going back to UC went from 99.9% of not goin...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

Hi friend How do you deal with the anger at alcoholics and the despair over your life and what you have to live with the rest of your life? I don't see a bright future for me right now.My life is empty.I have no fun and no love.I am reading the literature.Actually I am reading Getting Them Sober,a book hig...

serendipity · serendipity

is it common among us (alanoners) to always feel inadequate? i feel like everyone, and i mean everyone, is way smarted than i could ever even hope to be. everyone must know all the things i don't. consequently, i trust that everyone will be better at things that affect my life than i would be. and i have be...

angel123 · angel123

Went camping this past weekend.sitting at the lake with fishing pole in hand watching the trees blow softly from the tops of them.Seeing rabbits in the field eating the farmers beets.It was so serene,I said to my self this is serenity.....Nature has a way of finding peace within, if I made the time t...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Okay anybody having problems with getting into their PMs? When someone sent me one, I was able to retrieve it, but no resppond to it. I then clicked on their name to send them a PM and can't do that either. (Heavy sigh), I know great webmaster you have your handsfull, but these new c...

AlaMom · AlaMom

Recently I posted about an issue with my active A father and his move a couple thousand miles away. My father said that he would visit all his kids and grandchildren before he leaves. He leaves tomorrow and has yet to do any of what he said. I did expect that this would be the case and am...

cdb · cdb

It is after 4am and I can't sleep. I have been away. Yesterday while gone, I got a phone call from my husband. Our daughter relapsed. She stayed out all night and left her dog home for my husband to care of. No communication as to where she was until 3pm. Then my husband yelled at her. She didn't come home unt...

findingmyway · findingmyway

My husband and I have been separated for six months now and for the most part, I'm doing well. It's the times that he plays with the money that get to me. He hasn't paid any of the temporary alimony or child support he agreed to since April. I get so upset when I fall into the old traps.... believing hi...

dori · dori

Hi, Remember I was going to the meeting with my ex and his new gf.I went and she was one the speaker.I even shared at the meeting and even thank her for a great share. She did speak of him in her share guess what it didnt hurt the pain was gone no more pain of the lost or any thing it was gone. ...

david62 · david62

Hi everyone, I will be unable to chair tonight's meeting in the chat room. I hope someone can fill in for me.

Take care everyone...Happy Wednesday night! David

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I so wanted to kill her Monday. I had to work 5pm to 10 pm. She knew we had to go make an arrangement to pay off the mobile home she was suppose to work off. I now solely have my name on the payments of paying for the mh & setup. total $1500. Her name is not on it. She half heartedly apologized for it not...

confused · confused

Does this sound weird to anyone? My AH and I have recently reconciled. During and before our separation he was not contributing financially to the household. About 3-4 weeks before we reconciled he began giving me a minimal amount of money each week. I let him know that I...

shadow1 · shadow1

When I first came to Alanon I was numb. All I wanted to do was learn how to get my AH to stop drinking. I wanted to control the situation. I have learned over the past while that I cannot do that. No one can control another’s actions. I was in the room talking to some people the other day and asked them “If your A...

maresie2 · maresie2

As anyone who remembers I came in here over the Christmas holiday bereft. My A had as normal gone over to his mother's. I made a nice dinner and he was totally out of it. I vow now not to make another nice dinner for Christmas or even for Thanksgiving and just to take care of msyelf. I know this w...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) In the last couple of days I learned that its real easy to get sucked into the A's drama and forget for a while about using the Alanon tools. I feel that I'm learning to apply the slogans and steps to my life and relationships, but some days it all feels like it went out the window...

jacksmom · jacksmom

I wrote yesterday about my A boyfriend who was missing. He died. I'm lost.

chris52 · chris52

Just to let you all know I'm still waiting for the phoneline to be fixed. have begged and pleaded and been made countless promises but things are notoriously S....L.....O.....W here. I do venture to the internet cafe and avail myself of the chance to at least try and read some posts.....it's a slow pro...

annmarie · annmarie

hi everyone, I think I might be going crazy....certainly can't see the wood fro the trees...can anyone advise me please. My Aboyfriend did a disappearing act for a few days......has been dry for a few months (was in rehab) but had a couple of relapses lately....started smoking dope again as we...

Cilla · Cilla

Just got off the phone with sons "recovering" alcoholic father. Seems that he got papers to show up in court with son too..... and what is the first words out of his mouth..... why do I have to go???? I don't have any money.... ugggggggh' Ok.... I feel a bit better n...

shadow1 · shadow1

I just wanted to thank everyone for there thoughts and prayers for my friends daughter. Her test came back negative for leukemia.

tls515 · tls515

I'm really new to this. I don't know if I am doing the right thing. I do know that my partner of 8 years drinks alot lately and has been terribly hurtful when in that sloppy drunken state. He becomes belittling, condescending, and argumentative when he's drunk. I feel so hurt...

babysteps · babysteps

First he goes on a 5 day bender...either passed out or working on getting there. Then when he "comes around," he is angry that I have made plans to spend the evening with a friend. I said, "do you expect me to sit around anxiously awaiting your return? How was I to know today would be the day you sober up? I am...

Belongtome · Belongtome

I am determined to send you a post relating only to me and my efforts to recovery. So many times, my posts dwell on what was done to me. Bull..... I am an adult, and should be saying, I allowed this to penetrate my serenity. But, when I fall away from the program, for any length of time...

Becky1 · Becky1

Well, going away, but not permanantly. I'm off to see my Mom, sister, and nephew in Kansas (almost 900 miles) from where I live. I am leaving July 1, and coming back on the 8th. I am going alone, and leaving my AH here to take care of the house and the cats (which he hates.) He hates the ca...

Dog · Dog

I did not contact my A this weekend as contracted. I hit some bumps and waves but I rode them and made it through. Now I'm going to go through this week in the same style. I am out and staying out. Thanks all for this board. There is no way I could have done this a month ago but between your stories, the fram...

hudsond · hudsond

Last Thursday I bought the biography of Lois Wilson, When Love is Not Enough. I spent my weekend reading it. IT was wonderful--the story and I needed somehting to keep me occupied since I broke my toe and couldn't really get around.) I haven't quite finished it, but I have really enjoyed it. I have been g...

serendipity · serendipity

i went to see a movie with my ah. i think of him now as my ex. he should have been 3 months ago my i have an idiot lawyer. ok that sounds harsh, maybe he's and alcoholic too! he's a master of avoiding. so, we went to the movies and had a nice time, he came back here and played with the kids and stayed for dinn...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Too many emotions (Preview) Sometimes I wish I could be one of those people are so unaffected by emotions - sometimes that just seems so tempting. . . As I have posted before, our daughter, an addict, got out of rehab last Thursday, this week she has already returned to old behaviors. Self-diagnosing herself with pneumo...	Rita G	5	586	Jun 30, 2006 by nmike
	I'm done. (Preview) Well after trying to receive love from her for over 2 years, I am done. I cannot mainly believe that first year of what I thought was bliss and almost perfection has turned into THIS; however it has, and I accept that. I realize now the woman whom I fell in love with never existed. She was a facade creat...	Tony	9	603	Jun 30, 2006 by Tony
	Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow (Preview) Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow Today is the tomorrow I worried about yesterday. And today was such a lovely day, that I wondered why I worried about today yesterday. So today I am not going to worry about tomorrow. There may not be a tomorrow anyway. So today I am going to live as if there is no tomor...	txmom	4	641	Jun 30, 2006 by dori
	Drunk driving story real touching (Preview) THIS IS AN ACTUAL INCIDENT On the last day before Christmas, I hurried to go to the supermarket to buy the remaining of the gift I didn't manage to buy earlier. When I saw all the people there, I started to complain to myself: "It is going to take forever here and I still have so many other places to go..." "C...	kerry5	3	649	Jun 30, 2006 by bubbles1990
	Heard a great line... (Preview) I heard a great line tonight on a talk show. Ironically enough the show was about damaged relationships between fathers and daughters. There are no coincidences just "God"incidences. The line is "Pain is the expectation of control". How true this can be for those of us...	AlaMom	3	335	Jun 30, 2006 by peewee
	Made a big decision (Preview) (((Hello Everyone))) Some good news on the board today... guess I'll share mine. I finally made a decision to get off my butt and start a side business. I have held a Cosmotology license for a long time and have worked in salons making part time money. I did a business cours...	twinmom2	7	464	Jun 30, 2006 by peewee
	3 L's (Preview) Ok this is driving me nuts , someone who comes in the room has thier closing out statement as the 3 L's ------------ but have listed 4. soooooooooooo i never really thought of myself as a perfectionist and I try to mind my own business most days . But that is driving me nuts !!!!!!!!!! O...	abbyal	1	593	Jun 30, 2006 by angel123
	HELP! (Preview) I need to talk with someone and decided to log in to this message board for some comfort......... maybe someone out there might know or has also been diagnosed with liver damage and is going through the final stages. I live with an alcoholic (I am not) that has just been diagnosed with no li...	vangellic	4	431	Jun 30, 2006 by lebe27
	Have a Safe Holiday and....quote (Preview) whether traveling, or staying home! ....I hope those of you who are home near the computer, check in for those who are struggling to make it through this holiday. For me, the fourth of July was and has been the #1 Flashback holiday (for post-traumatic stress syndrome ...	wallsal55	0	517	Jun 30, 2006 by wallsal55
	Step One (Preview) I've spent many years trying to get to the stage where I could actually admit I was powerless over alcohol, and that my life had become unmanageable. I think the main problem was that I always assumed that I was in the midst of other people's problems. Problems caused by As in my life as I saw it. And be...	annmarie	1	529	Jun 30, 2006 by aunitedway
	Feeling so down today! (Preview) Told my ex/bf that I didn't want to see him any more. 2 weeks ago today. I wrote him a letter yesterday telling him a few more things that didn't get said. Haven't seen or heard from him in 2 weeks and I'm staying so sad and depressed. I guess I thought he would try and see me. Told him that if he decided that he d...	sisdragonfly1957	4	423	Jun 30, 2006 by aunitedway
	Thank you Abbyal (Preview) Just a quick note to say thank you to Abby for providing me with a lightbulb moment. From now on I will enjoy the silences that occur in my household when my other half has her knickers in a knot. I will put on the music and dance, I will watch a show I enjoy on the television, I will no long...	lilms	1	302	Jun 30, 2006 by abbyal
	feeling better (Preview) talked to a sober husband last night and this morning.He has joined AA and has a sponser.He sounds better than he has in a long time.I know better than to get my hopes up too high but I hope for his sake,my sake,and our childrens sake this helps.I miss the man I married and want him home again.But I know I can...	allison	2	546	Jun 30, 2006 by ET
	Still Struggling for Sanity (Preview) I'm still dealing with my family vacation loaded with lots of alcohol. I tried getting to a meeting yesterday (the only one I could make) and it was cancelled. I was so looking forward to it. This weekend is the BIG party. I know I need to detach. I also just found out my husband just got his 4th DUI. I st...	sandie123	6	528	Jun 30, 2006 by leo
	tiredtonite (Preview) how did your court go yesterday? I said a big prayer for you. robin	Robinks	1	349	Jun 30, 2006 by Robinks
	jennifer- drunk driveing.. (Preview) Hi, I was scanning down the posts rereading some and I came across yours and I read what you wrote about the next time you call the police or take the keys in the honor of my sister. That is the nicest thing any one has done for me inm along time it made me cry of joy thank you . dori	dori	2	456	Jun 30, 2006 by Jennifer
	Pray for peace (Preview) Our son was home on his 2 week leave. He left last Sat to go back into combat in Iraq. Although my AH and I are separated, we came together to greet our son and do whatever it took to help him enjoy a respite from his daily life. He saw his grandmothers and cousins and and brother and played with the babies he ha...	nmike	6	377	Jun 30, 2006 by afmom03
	Patience is needed but I'm loosing it quick (Preview) Well, here I am on "vacation" trying so hard to keep the focus on ME. It is a family vacation filled with all sorts of the disease. I am having such a hard time with the discussions and situations. I feel so bad for my kids having to deal and listen to all this 'diseased talk' when they are having such a hard ti...	sandie123	12	513	Jun 30, 2006 by peewee
	Difficult Mother (Preview) Hi everyone: I guess I just need some validation for my feelings! Things with my mom have been strained our whole lives. She left us when I was 14 years old, drank heavily then and pretty much never stayed in touch with us (my father raised us). Though she drinks rarely now,...	hersh	3	289	Jun 30, 2006 by peewee
	feel alone (Preview) Hi: I'm Barbara. I'm new here and have only posted once. I am having a hard time with people. I think I'll become a non people. My husband is not speaking to me. We had a fight 3 days ago. I kept it from esculating into a screaming match by using tec...	meowpur	4	348	Jun 30, 2006 by annmarie
	Need some ESH (Preview) I feel like I'm at the end of my rope with the A. All week he has been extremely angry and manipulative. First it was about buying a guitar and angry because we didn't have the money for him to continue putting it on lay-a-way. Then he was angry because he thought I was telling him he cou...	twinmom2	7	407	Jun 30, 2006 by debilyn
	Really need some support now ... (Preview) Hi, kind people. I posted here many months ago about the destruction of my marriage due to this disease. My ex husband and I were using addicts / alcoholics for years together. The birth of our daughter (born addicted) finally brought me to sobriety. I stopped seeing him when sh...	phoebemoonpie	12	501	Jun 30, 2006 by phoebemoonpie
	Saying goodbye... (Preview) is not always a terrible thing to do. I have posted a couple of times about the situation of my father moving very far away. Two days ago I was all over the map emotionally but didnt even realize it. It wasnt until after I raged at my husband and said some very hurtful things that I reali...	AlaMom	1	358	Jun 29, 2006 by cdb
	When was the last time you went to a doctor or dentist, and really took care of yourself? (Preview) Living with an alcoholic seriously affects our feels of self worth. We get sick. We suffer from guilt thinking that we caused the problem, and and we sit at home or at work in worry and fear, anxiety and stress. This makes us sicker. We hold things in and let if fester and grow within us, and our reactions t...	gardengal	8	414	Jun 29, 2006 by hmrnrnmm
	Chat room is coming up (Preview) Hi...I really want to join in on the chat room but the chat room is coming up when I open the page. Everything else opens on the page execpt where the chat should be going on it's just an empty black box. Anyone have any ideas why this is happening and how I can fix it..??? thanks!	daisygirly	1	265	Jun 29, 2006 by confused
	update (Preview) Hi, I posted a couple of weeks ago about my AH almost dying due to alcohol poisoning and how I confronted him after it in a liquor store. He agreed to go to rehab and he has been there for 5 days.Hate to say it, but I have gotten more done in these 5 days than I have in 6 months. I did see a...	evey	2	305	Jun 29, 2006 by AlaMom
	One of life's simple pleasures (Preview) One of mine is sitting in my recliner alone in the early morning while drinking my coffee and watching the hummingbirds outside my window eating from my feeder. Those little birds are so amazing to me. What's yours?	Gailey	6	426	Jun 29, 2006 by cdb
	Brothers court date coming up July 27 - now he lost his part time job! (Preview) Yikes spoke with my mother the other day and now my younger brother who is back in court July 27th lost his part time gas station job! He came to work two hours late - his boss said he gave him enough chances and let him go. He knew he had to "keep his back clean" and now he's done this?! My mother is afraid he'll...	Barbara	2	338	Jun 29, 2006 by cdb
	I'm pregnant!!! (Preview) I found out that I am pregnant and due March 05, 2007. I am a little excited, but mostly terrfied. I can't think of a more irresponsible thing to do. My oldest daughter lives with her dad, I can't afford the two that live with us. My husband is finally getting clean and working a...	Powerless	13	483	Jun 29, 2006 by Tammy
	The money issue (Preview) What are some of the ways you all deal with the money thing? I have become an expert at hiding money, but doing that makes me feel sick, because he is always calling me a liar, and I guess that makes him right, but I don't know how else to deal with it. I am just starting back to work again after 3 years of stayin...	jajanma	4	410	Jun 29, 2006 by seachange
	I feel like a crazy dumbell!! (Preview) I am posting here for the first time. I really need to vent..otherwise I will think about all this all day and it will impact everything I do today (it is only 7 am now!)..and maybe I will even lose my mind more. My husband of 5 1/2 years is an active alcoholic. I knew from the first month toge...	smub	4	411	Jun 29, 2006 by RamzDear
	Life Lesson from a Mule (Preview) A Life Lesson From A Mule A parable is told of a farmer who owned an old mule. The mule fell into the farmer's well. The farmer heard the mule braying. After carefully assessing the situation, the farmer sympathized with the mule, but decided that neither the mule nor the well was worth the trouble o...	txmom	4	305	Jun 29, 2006 by mastiff
	Message Board Fixed! (Preview) Hi Roomies, I just logged back on and the baord is fixed, the posts are now in order of start date!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ty for fixing it Webmaster!	Dolphin123	3	319	Jun 29, 2006 by Christy
	Update! (Preview) I have great news. I now have 3 jobs! I work at Mano's with sporadic hours making $5/hr + tips. I work at Arby's with currently unknown hours but making $6.75/hr. I work at Byrne Dairy my first night is tomorrow 5pm-12am making $6.75/hr. I'm so excited! My hope of going back to UC went from 99.9% of not goin...	Lanchas	2	316	Jun 29, 2006 by david62
	anger and despair (Preview) Hi friend How do you deal with the anger at alcoholics and the despair over your life and what you have to live with the rest of your life? I don't see a bright future for me right now.My life is empty.I have no fun and no love.I am reading the literature.Actually I am reading Getting Them Sober,a book hig...	drucilla06	5	330	Jun 28, 2006 by nmike
	inadequate (Preview) is it common among us (alanoners) to always feel inadequate? i feel like everyone, and i mean everyone, is way smarted than i could ever even hope to be. everyone must know all the things i don't. consequently, i trust that everyone will be better at things that affect my life than i would be. and i have be...	serendipity	1	300	Jun 28, 2006 by dori
	Catch and Release (Preview) Went camping this past weekend.sitting at the lake with fishing pole in hand watching the trees blow softly from the tops of them.Seeing rabbits in the field eating the farmers beets.It was so serene,I said to my self this is serenity.....Nature has a way of finding peace within, if I made the time t...	angel123	7	421	Jun 28, 2006 by Andrea12
	Can't get into my messages (Preview) Okay anybody having problems with getting into their PMs? When someone sent me one, I was able to retrieve it, but no resppond to it. I then clicked on their name to send them a PM and can't do that either. (Heavy sigh), I know great webmaster you have your handsfull, but these new c...	Karilynn	5	450	Jun 28, 2006 by Andrea12
	So sad the choices made... (Preview) Recently I posted about an issue with my active A father and his move a couple thousand miles away. My father said that he would visit all his kids and grandchildren before he leaves. He leaves tomorrow and has yet to do any of what he said. I did expect that this would be the case and am...	AlaMom	2	425	Jun 28, 2006 by MrBlue42
	Daughter's Relapse, Father's Spiteful tongue (Preview) It is after 4am and I can't sleep. I have been away. Yesterday while gone, I got a phone call from my husband. Our daughter relapsed. She stayed out all night and left her dog home for my husband to care of. No communication as to where she was until 3pm. Then my husband yelled at her. She didn't come home unt...	cdb	16	701	Jun 28, 2006 by cdb
	Still wears me out (Preview) My husband and I have been separated for six months now and for the most part, I'm doing well. It's the times that he plays with the money that get to me. He hasn't paid any of the temporary alimony or child support he agreed to since April. I get so upset when I fall into the old traps.... believing hi...	findingmyway	3	456	Jun 28, 2006 by abbyal
	I did it -the pain is gone (Preview) Hi, Remember I was going to the meeting with my ex and his new gf.I went and she was one the speaker.I even shared at the meeting and even thank her for a great share. She did speak of him in her share guess what it didnt hurt the pain was gone no more pain of the lost or any thing it was gone. ...	dori	8	480	Jun 28, 2006 by dori
	Wednesday PM meeting (Preview) Hi everyone, I will be unable to chair tonight's meeting in the chat room. I hope someone can fill in for me. Take care everyone...Happy Wednesday night! David	david62	0	307	Jun 28, 2006 by david62
	Please pray for a rainy day in GA July 4th (Preview) I so wanted to kill her Monday. I had to work 5pm to 10 pm. She knew we had to go make an arrangement to pay off the mobile home she was suppose to work off. I now solely have my name on the payments of paying for the mh & setup. total $1500. Her name is not on it. She half heartedly apologized for it not...	hmrnrnmm	8	533	Jun 28, 2006 by peewee
	ESH - jumbled emotions - finances (Preview) Does this sound weird to anyone? My AH and I have recently reconciled. During and before our separation he was not contributing financially to the household. About 3-4 weeks before we reconciled he began giving me a minimal amount of money each week. I let him know that I...	confused	6	443	Jun 28, 2006 by QOD
	Little ES&h from the heart (Preview) When I first came to Alanon I was numb. All I wanted to do was learn how to get my AH to stop drinking. I wanted to control the situation. I have learned over the past while that I cannot do that. No one can control another’s actions. I was in the room talking to some people the other day and asked them “If your A...	shadow1	9	511	Jun 28, 2006 by Christy
	the holidays (Preview) As anyone who remembers I came in here over the Christmas holiday bereft. My A had as normal gone over to his mother's. I made a nice dinner and he was totally out of it. I vow now not to make another nice dinner for Christmas or even for Thanksgiving and just to take care of msyelf. I know this w...	maresie2	2	260	Jun 28, 2006 by tea2
	The A's drama vs Alanon tools (Preview) (((Hello Group))) In the last couple of days I learned that its real easy to get sucked into the A's drama and forget for a while about using the Alanon tools. I feel that I'm learning to apply the slogans and steps to my life and relationships, but some days it all feels like it went out the window...	twinmom2	4	370	Jun 28, 2006 by Rita G
	he's gone (Preview) I wrote yesterday about my A boyfriend who was missing. He died. I'm lost.	jacksmom	36	919	Jun 28, 2006 by Andrea12
	still no phoneline but thinking of you all (Preview) Just to let you all know I'm still waiting for the phoneline to be fixed. have begged and pleaded and been made countless promises but things are notoriously S....L.....O.....W here. I do venture to the internet cafe and avail myself of the chance to at least try and read some posts.....it's a slow pro...	chris52	6	419	Jun 28, 2006 by maresie2
	blocked lines of communication (Preview) hi everyone, I think I might be going crazy....certainly can't see the wood fro the trees...can anyone advise me please. My Aboyfriend did a disappearing act for a few days......has been dry for a few months (was in rehab) but had a couple of relapses lately....started smoking dope again as we...	annmarie	7	442	Jun 28, 2006 by annmarie
	Momentary Scream (Preview) Just got off the phone with sons "recovering" alcoholic father. Seems that he got papers to show up in court with son too..... and what is the first words out of his mouth..... why do I have to go???? I don't have any money.... ugggggggh' Ok.... I feel a bit better n...	Cilla	7	400	Jun 28, 2006 by cdb
	update ty,ty,ty (Preview) I just wanted to thank everyone for there thoughts and prayers for my friends daughter. Her test came back negative for leukemia.	shadow1	6	345	Jun 28, 2006 by cdb
	Frightened new comer (Preview) I'm really new to this. I don't know if I am doing the right thing. I do know that my partner of 8 years drinks alot lately and has been terribly hurtful when in that sloppy drunken state. He becomes belittling, condescending, and argumentative when he's drunk. I feel so hurt...	tls515	10	535	Jun 27, 2006 by abbyal
	They are emotionally selfish (Preview) First he goes on a 5 day bender...either passed out or working on getting there. Then when he "comes around," he is angry that I have made plans to spend the evening with a friend. I said, "do you expect me to sit around anxiously awaiting your return? How was I to know today would be the day you sober up? I am...	babysteps	6	547	Jun 27, 2006 by peewee
	Focus on me (Preview) I am determined to send you a post relating only to me and my efforts to recovery. So many times, my posts dwell on what was done to me. Bull..... I am an adult, and should be saying, I allowed this to penetrate my serenity. But, when I fall away from the program, for any length of time...	Belongtome	5	363	Jun 27, 2006 by wallsal55
	Going Away (Preview) Well, going away, but not permanantly. I'm off to see my Mom, sister, and nephew in Kansas (almost 900 miles) from where I live. I am leaving July 1, and coming back on the 8th. I am going alone, and leaving my AH here to take care of the house and the cats (which he hates.) He hates the ca...	Becky1	7	334	Jun 27, 2006 by Becky1
	Went Cold Turkey (Preview) I did not contact my A this weekend as contracted. I hit some bumps and waves but I rode them and made it through. Now I'm going to go through this week in the same style. I am out and staying out. Thanks all for this board. There is no way I could have done this a month ago but between your stories, the fram...	Dog	9	441	Jun 27, 2006 by marchgrl
	Lois Wilson Biography (Preview) Last Thursday I bought the biography of Lois Wilson, When Love is Not Enough. I spent my weekend reading it. IT was wonderful--the story and I needed somehting to keep me occupied since I broke my toe and couldn't really get around.) I haven't quite finished it, but I have really enjoyed it. I have been g...	hudsond	3	326	Jun 27, 2006 by marchgrl
	i don't know (Preview) i went to see a movie with my ah. i think of him now as my ex. he should have been 3 months ago my i have an idiot lawyer. ok that sounds harsh, maybe he's and alcoholic too! he's a master of avoiding. so, we went to the movies and had a nice time, he came back here and played with the kids and stayed for dinn...	serendipity	2	366	Jun 27, 2006 by marchgrl
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.