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Physical, Emotional, Spiritual, Mental
(Preview)
Many many many times from newcomers I hear "If you had my life, you wouldn't think it was simple, either." "I don't understand why it is that you keep harping at me to eat and sleep. Don't you understand how much I have to do?" "You don't have kids. You don't get it." &quo...
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Tiger2006
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3
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531
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*cue background tune* Should I stay or should I go?
(Preview)
I know many people ask when to quit their respective relationships. In al anon it is our policy never to give advice, to do our best to mind our own business, and progress not perfection. But when I read today's Hazelden meditation, I couldn't help but think of my MIP AFG. It seems the most common questi...
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Tiger2006
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4
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754
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On this Good Friday...
(Preview)
I wish all of the "family" of the Christian faith a blessed Easter. May all of you find the peace and happiness you are striving for. Be good to one another, and remember we are all in this struggle together. With best regards to all, Diva
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Diva
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5
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519
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HAPPY EASTER!
(Preview)
(((((((Family)))), Just wanted to take a moment to wish you all a HAPPY EASTER! May the Easter Bunny and the Easter Beagle (remember Snoopy dressed up as an Easter Bunny?) be extra good to you. The poor kids up here may have to look for Easter Eggs in the snow! lol Hubby and I are spending the day (hopefu...
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Karilynn
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1
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376
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Alcoholism is a progressive, fatal disease.
(Preview)
Alcoholism is a progressive, fatal disease. Stark and sobering words. I have witnessed the horror of just how fast the disease progressed in my husband's case: After over 20 years of drinking "only" a 6-pack of beer "only" once a week, the disease caught up with him (and with m...
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Sunny2007
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5
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795
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Please pray for me
(Preview)
I have been depressed and anxious at the same time. I saw my A tonight--it was good. But it's me. I feel these feelings. After having this surgery, and now without the use of my left arm, my A is gone. I am trying to make friends. Got barely any sleep last night. Please pray I get some rest. 2 ladies from a smal...
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hippietrippiechick
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7
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687
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Re: Fear post
(Preview)
I have removed the post from, "Fear." It was requesting info for a book. See AA tradition number six. loves you people. debilyn
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debilyn
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2
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396
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being "powerless" doesn't mean being "helpless"
(Preview)
The daily entry for October 21 in "Courage to Change" (Conference Approved Literature) has been a great help to me in working my Al-Anon program and healing/recovering since 1995. One of the things I cling to when storms move into my space: "Powerless does not mean helpless."...
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Sunny2007
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2
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1591
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Who would have thought it?
(Preview)
(((((((Alanuts)))))) I got a call last week...from AA. Haven't seen or heard from any of them since A and I split 14 months ago."Where have you been Chris,we have missed you. We would all love to see you again and catch up. How about coming to a meeting?" It's funny because although I did have...
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chris52
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6
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418
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WHO'S WORSE THE ALCOHOLIC OR US..
(Preview)
(((((((((Roomies)))))))))))) My life has been really good the last few weeks...Because it's mostly been about me.. I have been putting myself first, for a change. I have been setting up my new group, and feeling really pleased with myself. Chairing meetings, and doing good with them.. I have a thy...
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ally
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8
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682
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Happy Birthday Kerryyyyyyyyy !!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Preview)
Happy Happy Birthday sweet kerry ! Hope your day is as wonderful as you are and that all your wishes come true this year! You deserve the very best ! Your a wonderful friend and a great mom ! Enjoy your day my friend Love Debs
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MeMyselfandI
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15
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522
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I asked HP for a sign and the phone rang...
(Preview)
I said the serenity prayer and begged god to give me a sign and show me what direction I need to be heading in and the phone rang and it was him. My AH just got out of jail. I didn't answer. Finally I called him at the payphone. He was stranded no money no place to stay etc. etc. He has been in this position b...
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carolinagirl
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8
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720
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There's acceptance and then there's acceptance (kinda long)
(Preview)
I have been doing a lot of intensive reading and thinking lately about how I came to be the way I am (co-dependent). And then how I am learning not to be that, learning to be less and less of that. I known for years that I am co-dependent, not only by being married to my A but also from being raised in...
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jaja
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1
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445
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let it begin with me
(Preview)
(((family))) It works if you work it. Had that experience at work yesterday. I manage a small business(store). The owner is my best friend and was having quite the bad day. Lots of negative energy in the store. Lots of negative comments...lots of what else can go wrong.. I just kept saying to my...
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carosie
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1
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383
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HOW DO YOU LET GO OF YOUR NEED TO CONTROL OTHER PEOPLE AND SITUATIONS???
(Preview)
For me it took a very long time and meetings meetings meetings to realize that no matter how I tried, I could not control or make someone do things they adamantly did no what to do. I was literally banging my head against a brick wall, but I tried over and over again. Twisting things, manipulating things s...
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gardengal
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6
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561
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Panic subsides
(Preview)
I still have no job. I may have to go work in a gas station if needbe. I know its dangerous but living with the A for 7 years has been dangerous what with his driving (erratically and dangerously) and tantrums and more for all that time. The gas station is one place 100's of people are not applying. I've be...
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maresie2
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4
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364
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expectations? (sorry long)
(Preview)
I read here all the time but havent posted much. I find all of the posts very helpful. I have been on this rollercoaster with my AH for about 9 months now. He has been living out of the house since August. We have 3 kids. S16, S12, D4 When my h is drinking I am not as anxious as when he is sober. When he is drinking...
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Angel1
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8
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746
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Choosing to *enjoy* the consequences
(Preview)
One of my most-often-read pages in "Courage to Change" is the entry for May 13. Here's part of that entry: "I find it much easier to risk making decisions when I stop thinking about suffering the consequences and remember that I have the option to enjoy the consequences." &quo...
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Sunny2007
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7
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658
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Negotiating Conflicts
(Preview)
This is a copy of an email that a recovery friend sent me yesterday. It is part of a daily devotional for Recovering Co-Dependants that she emails to a group of recovery friends. Thought it was an interesting look at relationships and conflicts. Prior to recovery, I thought that anytime there was a...
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Rita G
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3
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540
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I am not going to respond to his text
(Preview)
My AH text me in the middle of the night last night. I didn't get it unti this morning. "I'm glad you are over me but I am sad you are over me" "Can't say I am sorry enough. Wish I could turn back time " "Glad u can sleep, I can't under the circumstances-love u 4ever" &quo...
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QOD
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7
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643
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If I was her HP, would I do anything different?
(Preview)
(((((Everyone))))) I am only half joking. We in this program often say if we could just take the sickness away we would. I believe my HP "could" do that, but my HP has a reason for allowing people to learn from their actions. To choose that which is healthy for them. Work at it and feel pr...
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rtexas
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7
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1300
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feel a little better--now prayer works
(Preview)
Thank everyone for your prayers. I did sleep all night--woke up once. Tired, body sore, just trying to get myself together. To HP: thank you for this day, bless my friends and family, and help relieve me of the bondage of self. You guys are great. I belong to several other support groups online that deal...
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hippietrippiechick
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0
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358
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Can you answer this?
(Preview)
Tell me why drugs are illegal like pot ect and drinking is still legal? I mean drinking is not valuable to anyone's life and in fact, it kills probably more then any street drug. So why is it that it's still legal? I was just wondering if you know the answer. If the advertising of alcohol were to stop on bill...
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Friendofyours
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11
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627
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Vivatrol
(Preview)
Vivatrol is a once a month shot the alcoholic takes that greatly reduces or eliminates the craving for alcohol. This as well as participation in AA and out-patient therapy really seems to be doing the trick for my husband. At first I was skeptical, and I am not trying to be naive, but my husband has bee...
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sash
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11
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2817
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Sharing my prayer today....
(Preview)
((((((Everyone)))))) I have made it a habit lately of starting my day by reading this prayer. Today I am concentrating on the passage "... Help me find compassion without empathy overwhelming me...." It is an old Cherokee prayer I have had stashed away for a while now. I have posted it be...
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rtexas
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8
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398
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Thank-you for your prayers!
(Preview)
Took son to see the specialist today. His vision is improving!!!!! He's still umcompfortable a bit, but is healing quite well. The doc said it will just take time. He couldn't tell us if his vision will come back to the way it was, but he is now seeing 20/30. He may have to wear glasses or a contact lens, but...
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TLC2
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6
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376
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Smokey
(Preview)
Some of you may have heard me share at a meeting on Sunday that I had a dog that was very sick. He died today. We are pretty sure he had pancreatic cancer. He was sick less than a week. Most of that time he was at the vet on IV and pain meds. I'm glad he is not in pain and was not in pain when he died. I am glad he was no...
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afglin
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12
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484
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text message
(Preview)
my ex sent me a text today. he's never done that before. he hasn't even called since sunday which i was grateful for. the thing is i was looking at houses to buy. looked at like 6. fell in love with 2 that are out of my price range. that's me champagne taste and boone's farm buget! and so before i could even sav...
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serendipity
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5
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752
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I Introduced Her to Alanon
(Preview)
Hi all remember me.... Barisax... sober AA, fully qualified member of Alanon, long term single with a good start on a relationship for the first time in <mumble> years. She is not an alcoholic! She has been to a couple of open AA meetings with me, which she enjoyed, but I think I convinced her, s...
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barisax
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6
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607
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I Don't Want to be Beat Up
(Preview)
Alright Diva, I ordered the book!!!!! lilms
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lilms
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5
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567
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FINDING IT HARD DOING FOR ME
(Preview)
((((((Friends))))))) I saw a book online that I would really like to own. In the store it would be $42 dollars and change. Online with shipping it is less than $30. So off I go to the store and buy an online gift card for this particular site so I can order the book. And now here is the problem. I feel TERR...
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lilms
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5
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601
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Live and Let live (slogan)
(Preview)
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angel123
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1
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1478
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Thanks & Update for Everyone in TUESDAY,3April07,9AM EASTERN Time meeting
(Preview)
To Everyone in the meeting shown in the title of this post ... Thank you for being present so that I could have a meeting right before going to see what the CAT scan of my brain would show. Thank you for your prayers and support in the meeting. I took with me to my appointment something to remind me that all...
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Sunny2007
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7
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958
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Attend my first meeting
(Preview)
Last night, I attended my first Naranon meeting. It went very well. There was a group of about 20 of us and anyone w/ 6 meetings or under went to another room w/ a leader. There was a total of 5 of us...and everyone had a different situation. After the leader told us her story, I was the first to go. I didnt eve...
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DanieH
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4
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676
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NOTICE
(Preview)
((((((((((GUYS))))))))))))))) IF YOU NOTICE, THIS NOTICE, YOU WILL NOTICE, THAT THIS NOTICE, IS NOT WORTH NOTICING..... Im sorry.......childhood memory just came back to me.....
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ally
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3
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477
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Miss you all
(Preview)
Hello Dear Friends, Sorry I have been so absent of late, life has been a roller coaster ride as of late... In a great way most of the time... I found a new job, love it secretarial again...my thing...crazy hours...but much fun.. Have a new wonderful man in my life...he is just awesome..self employed,...
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Andrea12
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13
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682
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anyone else here face insecurity? daily? momentarily? anyone?
(Preview)
Just read a story in the education section of the NY Times, about young ladies today graduating high school and the pressures they face to get into college. I didn't realize how hard the story hit me till I finished it. All of the sudden, waves of feeling "less than," "not enough,&quo...
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Tiger2006
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8
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973
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I'm adding fuel to my own fire.
(Preview)
Oh boy, where do I start.....I have been taking pain meds for over a year. Vicodin ES to be exact. Ever since I had my son and thirteen months later gave birth to my twins, my back has hurt really bad to the point that it can make me sick to my stomach. So I do have legitimate pain. Here's my concern......One v...
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Friendofyours
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4
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519
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The denial fog lifts. Again.
(Preview)
"I think little Sarah is still waiting for Daddy to come home. It would be wise for you to realize the fact that he's never coming home. He's already home. This is him."
The immortal words of my councelor in session yesterday, which hit hard on my morning 10th step. And oh, how the words pour...
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Tiger2006
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4
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594
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my mother
(Preview)
I am getting better. My mother came over yesterday to watch the kids while I work. She's great about stepping in when my ex decides to step out. Well, not great but she does it, complaining all the while and not putting them to bed at any reasonable hour and feeding them only turkey bacon and noodles and bu...
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serendipity
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5
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577
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why alanon is hard for me
(Preview)
I haven't been on this board for a while-- but as I sat here this AM telling my H that I don't think I want to do this marriage thing anymore if he can't see that he is an addict---- I realized this is exactly where I need to be.
The problem for me is that my A is really a marijuana addict (daily) who sup...
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gknee
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6
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1262
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Breaking the Cycle, letting go, painful
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I've been trying and trying to put a message on here and can't seem to do it. I'm in a lot of pain with letting go of my daughters and granddaughter. When I try to post, I find myself not able to express what I'm going through without writing a book, so I'm writing about breaking the cyc...
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carolena
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4
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604
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life goes on
(Preview)
hi everyone,sorry i havent posted in awhile but as you all know i left my AH AND MOVED FROM FLORIDA BACK TO NY..but im doing good..AH is in rehab in florida and doing very well..he is going to church and doing meetings,and doing what he has to do.where he is they have a 3 step program..the first step is like...
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bev
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4
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506
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Painful Progress
(Preview)
Well, I have told my A that when he is released from jail he cannot come home. Leading up to that conversation I had a lot of anxiety. Working out my plans with those I trust. Initially I worried horribly about my ability to keep the boundaries I was setting and even moreso about the consequences (he ca...
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Leetle
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7
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629
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Step 2 and Each new Day
(Preview)
These are from our Forum,Refreshing to me to read each day hope you enjoy as well Love Sharon/angel
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angel123
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1
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355
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My AH won't let go - UPDATE!
(Preview)
Thanks to all for the sharing. My AH came over for dinner tonight. TACOS. He came right in and hugged me & snuck a kiss in on me. Then he laughed at how he did that. BLAH. So I was in the middle of making dinner when my cell phone rang. He was standing right by it and saw a guy's name come up. A guy from t...
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QOD
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7
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589
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settling
(Preview)
"If you can't feel loved, settle for being needed" I just read that in Codependant no More. It spoke out a little to me. I remember, not too far into my marriage, wanting to soak up love like a sponge, and just not FEELING it. So I became a little desperate for him to feel pleased with me. I looked...
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RainyJamie
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4
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331
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fear fear fear
(Preview)
Why is that now I am contemplating life on my own I feel tremendous fear. I lived quite ok on my own for years before I met the A. I now think I am not capable of it. I have been trying to fashion another fail safe plan. I do not want to be stuck living with the A. He is moving to some remote area. Everything in his l...
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maresie2
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8
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593
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An extra special Pipers Kitty Day
(Preview)
((((((((Family))))), Tomorrow is my beloved Pipers Kitty 4th birthday. It is also my 3rd anniversary with hubby. When I think back where we were a year ago, I am stunned by the changes in me and in my life. I was incredibly unhappy and sad because he was still drinking and I thought it would never end....
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Karilynn
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11
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861
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THINK
(Preview)
This is from the forum...Hope it works love angel
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angel123
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5
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411
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Another Article Share..re...Detatchment
(Preview)
The ability to allow people, places, or things the freedom to be themselves. Holding back from the need to rescue, save, or fix another person from being sick, dysfunctional, or irrational. Giving another person "the space'' to be him or herself. Disengaging from an over-enmeshed or depende...
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Phil
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6
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686
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New lease....
(Preview)
Hello ((((((Everyone)))))) My new found skill in sticking to my boundries has been tested to the bitter end over the past few weeks. For those that don't know, my AW and I are seperated and have been for 5 months now. She has learned to talk the talk of getting better (getting help and getting sober), b...
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rtexas
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8
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551
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Working out my recovery in my own way
(Preview)
As I continue to work out my recovery in my way and my time there are some things that bother me more than others, so those are the things that I pray on(cause that is what I do....:) I am really working on my attitude with my AH, that is something that really drives me nuts, not to mention it drives him nuts al...
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doxie
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3
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579
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feeling bad about how I'm feeling
(Preview)
I find myself hoping that my 19 year old isn't at home when I return from work etc. I am so tired, her and her friends are very disrespectful. I have told her no drugs and drinking in this house, both myself and husband are in recovery and we have other children as well. And it continues, she even puts empty...
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gimmpy
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6
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548
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My AH won't let go!
(Preview)
My AH doesn't seem to want to let go of our relationship. I told him a week ago that it was over. That I didn't see us getting back together. That I still love him but it isn't the same.He seems to grasp this concept for a few days and then WHAM, right back to the same ol' crap. He loves me, misses me, so lone...
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QOD
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10
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641
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Step 1
(Preview)
This is From the Forum 1989,hope you are enjoying the pages posted.love Angel
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angel123
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4
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479
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"RECOVERY IN RELATIONSHIPS" -be part of next CAL book
(Preview)
Literature coodinators have received word that WSO is still looking for shares for the next book-in-progress, whose working title is "Recovery in Relationships". CAL literature (and in fact our whole Alanon program) depend on members sharing their own experience, strength and hope...
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thinkstoomuch
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0
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328
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boundry
(Preview)
i made the boundry that my ex ah could not see or have any contact with me or the kids. if he wants to see them i need something legal. he has called a few times and i don't say anything just "get a lawyer". it was hard for me but it got easier. yesterday he called and asked to speak to the kids and i sai...
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serendipity
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2
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372
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NEED TO GIVE MY A AN ULTIMAUM--NEED SOME ESH PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Preview)
Well, now that my A has not been living w/ me, it has gotten worse, but in a different way. I say I do not miss the nightly chaos that can spring up at a drunken moment, or when I have had enough, not taking my meds right and flipping out. I think him even being here aggravates my mental illness. For one, I have f...
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hippietrippiechick
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14
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762
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What a Turnaround
(Preview)
Last week I was full of sorrow about my AH and I splitting up and possibly heading to the divorce courts. This past weekend I spent the entire weekend with him and he has told me that after his two binges ober tyhe past two or three weeks he has realized that he is not happy and he wants a better life. /he said t...
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albertarose
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5
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553
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