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AM ends
(Preview)
Got up this AM with work to do that I had pending for 3 days by inventory. I had to finish the inventory with some self centered behavior I relapsed into days ago. It didn't feel fair, just and honest and most of that was due to letting it linger. My mind body and spirit kept me focused on the subject and I...
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JerryF
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6
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2498
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Courage to Change - February 12 - Detachment
(Preview)
Today's reading suggests that detachment is a choice we can make. The author noticed that it was easy to detach from the moods of casual friends -- but with family members, it was hard to avoid taking on someone's negative moods and attitudes. The solution was to pay attention to their own mood befor...
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Freetime
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5
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1819
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February 11, 2021 – ODAT – The First Step
(Preview)
The first of the twelve steps in Al-Anon, it is suggested, should leave no doubt where we stand when it comes to dealing withalcoholic situations. Admitting we are powerless over alcohol" might challenge our need to control the chaos, because weautomatically want to fix this, but the step goes on t...
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Debb
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5
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1606
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January 21, 2021 – ODAT – Self -Pity & Resentment
(Preview)
Todays reading has to do with how clearly and honestly we see our present circumstances. The reading goes on to say that we should be at peace and not fall victim to harboring resentment and self-pity.The reading suggests that when we compare our lives with that of others that it is then that the destr...
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Debb
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16
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3736
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Courage to Change February 10
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares about one of the effects of alcoholism - many of us have denied or devalued our talents, feelings, achievements, and desires. Through work in the Al-Anon program, we can learn to know, appreciate, and express our true selves. Imagination can take p...
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Skorpi
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5
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2340
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2/9/21 ODAT in AlAnon – The ‘Why’ Doesn’t Matter…
(Preview)
Today's page encourages consideration of the futility of time spent trying to determine why the alcoholic drinks. Even if we had that info and limitless time and money to treat it clinically, there is no guaranty of success for their recovery.Reminder: The alcoholic can find recovery in the rooms o...
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Enigmatic
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9
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2069
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Keep coming back it works when I work it...
(Preview)
This is the slogan that has protected my mind, body, spirit and emotions and was passed on to me right after my very first AGF meeting. It has caused me to understand Step One and in response have a much different life than when I started recovery around 2/8/79 and get totally involved on many levels inc...
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JerryF
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4
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1966
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Hope for Today Feb 7
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about comparing ourselves to others, in a competitive way, as a motivation to do better. The writer describes doing this in order to seek praise. The writer was judging others and him/herself harshly enough that ultimately no one measures up. Going to alan...
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yanksfan51
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4
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1663
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ODAT in alanon, 2/8
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 2/8, talks about seeing cheerful, smiling people when we first enter the rooms. We are astonished, says the author, as we didnt think it possible, if those people have the same problems we do. And down the road, we could even find out their problems are worse than mine! Remind...
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Lyne
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5
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2602
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Working it and it’s working
(Preview)
Sharing a positive moment I had this week. It was the clearest evidence Ive seen of the program working when you work it. I have a new boss. This always scares the heck out of me. I always worry their expectations wont line up with my needs, theyll think I suck at my job, theyll hate me and Ill lose my job. Mea...
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sunmustshine
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4
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1844
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Oh, I suppose have another qualifier?
(Preview)
??? A close friend... ...I have years of experience behind me. I can manage now. "Jack"...hmmm... in recent times I tend to say that the only qualifier I bring to a meeting is myself... ...not sure how this sits with Alanon... because sometimes I don't know where anything sits with everyone and eve...
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DavidG
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3
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1679
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COURAGE TO CHANGE - SATURDAY
(Preview)
Dear Readers, Today's reading in Courage to Change was about our thinking, and how when distorted, we can try and force solutions. We tend to not want to wait-- we want things fixed NOW! However, many times, the best course of action is... inaction. Sometimes it is wise to wait and see. As the saying goe...
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PosiesandPuppies
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4
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204
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do you ever?
(Preview)
Do you ever feel like stopping time & not reflecting on the past so much? It has been almost exactly a month since I posted on here. I am dealing a lot w/ gratitude as a way to let go of the past a little. I don't want to focus on those things that made me feel horrible in the past & make each day count by b...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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986
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Family Topic - Question For Y'all
(Preview)
I have noticed that AH's side of the family, especially this year, did not recognize my birthday. Did not give it much thought as it was in October. AH's birthday is this coming Sunday and my parents sent him a card and gift, my daughter stopped by with a card and gift for him, his brothers and sister sent...
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Debb
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8
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1354
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Courage to Change - February 5 - When the Student is Ready
(Preview)
Today's reading explains that although we might wish that we -- or others -- had come to Al-Anon sooner, we each get here "right on schedule." The author quotes the saying, "When the student is ready, the teacher appears." They share that they attended their first Al-Anon meeting 20 years after fir...
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Freetime
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5
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247
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February 4, 2021 – ODAT – Self Deception
(Preview)
Todays ODAT reading suggests that we have to face the fact that when we look at the outside forcesfor the reasons for the trials we are experiencing, that the real reasons can be found within ourselves,hence the self deception. We maybe frustrated with the alcoholic in our lives, yet however diffic...
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Debb
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3
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321
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God grant me....
(Preview)
I just had the most insane, circular, unproductive, half hour phone call with my A. It took me an entire half hour to say that I had to go. I am left feeling anxious, and I have back pain that developed during the call. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change w...
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Lyne
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4
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1171
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R4902018 (More Recognizable as ODAT 2/2 - Power Greater, Back to Sanity)
(Preview)
Today's page considers Step 2 as the entry to 'understanding and growth' after accepting that we could not manage our lives under our power alone in Step 1. We now see as possible that a 'Power greater than ourselves could lead us to sanity'.Recognizing our own unreasonableness and humble position h...
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Enigmatic
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6
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695
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Courage to Change February 3
(Preview)
Today's author shares their initial thoughts about serenity, and how those thoughts changed over time. When the author first arrived at Al-Anon, they heard that the principles of the program could lead to serenity. The author, however, didn't want serenity - sitting on top of a mountaintop with a...
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Skorpi
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4
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218
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A Changed Attitude
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, Just wanted to share a different response to an ongoing problem in my home. We have had ongoing plumbing issues with neighbors above us which I have reported to management. Landlord is an alcoholic who is progressing. I've learned to contact property caretakers for a more immediate res...
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tiredtonite
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4
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246
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Island fever
(Preview)
Living on a small island is like living in a small town only you can't drive to a city. That latter difference can contribute a lot to island fever, where basically if you're not careful you can turn into a permanently snippy version of your fine self. I am suffering a little island fever. The collective...
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a4l
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3
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292
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Popping in to say HELLO!
(Preview)
Hello - been a LONG while since I've been here, you know how life gets busy and things fall away from us. I've never forgotten what a help this message board was for me in escaping the insanity my life had become. I recommend it often to people, but as you know, recommend is all we can do. I live alone, quietl...
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likemyheart
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5
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235
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Courage to Change Jan 30 - Not living by old fears
(Preview)
Good morning, dear readers! Today's reading in Courage to Change speaks about being able to live each day as it comes, to be free from living by old fears. Living with alcoholism in your family, one can learn that plans could change at any moment and that the "rules" varied accordingly. Many can devel...
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PosiesandPuppies
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11
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284
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Sanity
(Preview)
Hi, Im pretty new to al anon groups and am mightily impressed so far. The only thing about the steps that concerns me is the one that refers to sanity. I have been detained under the mental health act twice in my life and had a severe mental illness, treatment necessitating 3 months in a psych ward. I know t...
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Puddlediver
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6
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364
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"Hope is a good thing" (and sometimes it's all we have)
(Preview)
After a lot of years of watching my son deal with his demons (he's been sober for a few years now), I was overjoyed to attend his wedding recently. Of course, I'm a VERY happy Dad. I'd like to say that I'm rock-solid on knowing that for both of us it's one day at a time, but I have to remind myself of that cons...
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texas yankee
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12
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563
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Courage to Change - January 29 - Expressing Ourselves
(Preview)
Today's reading talks about the difference between expressing ourselves and using words to control others. It suggests that if we say the same thing many times -- and are only satisfied when the other person responds a certain way -- we might be trying to control someone. If we can express what is on...
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Freetime
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6
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308
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ODAT in alanon, 2/1
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 2/1, is about taking Step 1: admitted we were powerless. The author stresses how we must impress these words on our consciousness so that it becomes an established way of thinking and feeling. We may have to repeat this step hundreds of times! We must accept the fact that we...
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Lyne
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2
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224
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A Wonderful Memory
(Preview)
Recently, I read a sharing on this program the person mentioned about a Western, and it brought back a lovely memory for me, so I would like to share it with all of you. I was at a AA, Alanon weekend, and was in line to have lunch, and I started talking to a young man who was in front of me. We started talking...
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WendyP
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4
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212
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Hope for Today Jan 31
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a look at Tradition One (Our common welfare should come first; personal progress for the greatest number depends upon unity). The writer describes how new meaning was given to tradition one for him/her when another member shared the idea that the interpre...
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yanksfan51
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4
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233
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Vipers or rather how to have boundsries
(Preview)
-- Edited by Maresie888 on Friday 29th of January 2021 01:07:53 PM -- Edited by Maresie888 on Friday 29th of January 2021 02:51:42 PM
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Maresie888
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4
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237
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I wept at my f2f meeting...
(Preview)
Hi y'all... I don't have to keep Alanon going, worldwide. I still need keep the focus on myself... ...and i seem to manage to do this. I wondered if i had loyalty issues, with gin got another group. Seems not. I wept at my meeting last night. Tears of relief really. I could have killed myself anyti...
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DavidG
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3
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225
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January 28, 2021 – ODAT – Let Go and Let God
(Preview)
Todays ODAT reading suggests that when we are faced with the disruption, pain and disgrace that iscaused by living with an alcoholic that we are sometimes faced with desperation and confusion. We know that action is required which can take many different forms of impartial counsel, but themost fi...
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Debb
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6
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360
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Detachment with Love
(Preview)
I am currently trying to set boundaries with my parent alcoholic. He is a very loving father but when he drinks it is like talking to another person. He has been dealing with alcoholism for quite some time now, has been to rehab twice but hasnt kept up with AA or a regular program. A few years ago he and my mo...
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MrRy2020
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9
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456
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Courage to Change January 27
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading from C2C, the author shares a moment when they were able to recognize that they were really in trouble: There were unwashed dishes in the sink, and this triggered the author to consider throwing someone they loved very much out of their life forever. The author realized...
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Skorpi
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7
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213
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Grief Betty one year anniversary
(Preview)
I started a grief support group yesterday night Going to the group actually related to a friend of mine who committed suicide. At the time of his suicide my therapist told me I needed to know exactly what happened around his entirely unexoected death. One of my charactor traits is righteousness....
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Maresie888
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2
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225
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1/26/2021 ODAT - Temporary or way of Life?
(Preview)
Today's page notes that it is desperation over another's drinking that drives most of us to AlANon. Many are surprised when, instead of instruction on how to 'control' the alcoholic, the program provides guidance on how to do just the opposite. Some who find success in this approach mistakenly thi...
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Enigmatic
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4
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239
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ODAT in alanon, 1/25
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 1/25, discusses exactly how to correct our faults. We just cant eliminate or will them away. The author says that bad habits must be replaced with their opposites, substituting the positive for the negative, thus the I WILL for the I WONT. Reminder: If I am morose and discon...
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Lyne
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7
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314
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Hope for Today Jan 25
(Preview)
Today's reading speaks about learning to have fun and to play. The author states that were raised as a child of two alcoholic parents. They identify as being industrious and goal-oriented. Learning to play and have fun doesn't come naturally to them but they would like to include these forms of relax...
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tiredtonite
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5
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269
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Mantra for Sunday
(Preview)
BACKGROUND: As happens more times than not, I return from my condo and re-enter my home with my A. The dog goes back and forth with me which adds fuel to the fire. I prepare myself on Saturdays using my program tools to enter the marital situation in neutral, and sometimes hopeful that we can have peac...
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Lyne
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7
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213
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Shut out of my grandchild's life
(Preview)
Hi everyone I hope you are all keeping well, I haven't posted in a long time, thankfully I haven't needed to but now I have a dilemma and would really appreciate feedback from anyone who has been through similar and even if you haven't, some recovery perspective, please!
My son is an addict, he has bee...
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Sorcha
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15
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943
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Learning to see the wider Alanon- in my own neck of the woods...
(Preview)
I had this kind of dream- or vision- of being a tiny part of a wider Alanon movement ...which includes other 12 steps groups... I had been to Stepping Stones in upper state NY. I talked with Betty [Hotrod] abut this. She had been there too. Maybe with a large group. We were overseas visitors. Just my S...
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DavidG
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6
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1408
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Hope for Today Jan 24
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is about maintaining serenity in our lives. The writer describes how willingly some of us hand off our serenity when encountering alcoholic behavior. In this reading it is compared to our reaction when someone asks for the salt to be passed at a meal. Not even th...
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yanksfan51
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5
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210
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Courage to Change - January 22
(Preview)
Hello MIP friends, I am posting quite late and shorter than usual. I've been without internet for a few days, hopefully being fixed tomorrow, and this has been quite a lesson in Acceptance. But meanwhile, I am humbled to be able to post about this reading which tells me the true meaning of Detachment.
...
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Freetime
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6
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1095
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Backdraft
(Preview)
There are now some new technical terms to describe some of our issues in recovery One of them is #backdraft# that is when we start applying boundaries, regulating our emotions and doing better self care we sometimes have to deal with even more symptoms The other issue of course is when we begin to set...
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Maresie888
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8
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882
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C2C 1/23/21
(Preview)
Today in Courage to Change, the pages talk about Step 3: we "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over the the care of God as we understood Him." I will be quoting directly from the pages: "This is a big decision for those of us who have a tough time making even small decisions. Until I found Al-Anon...
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PosiesandPuppies
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4
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181
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Courage to Change January 20
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author reflects on anonymity in Al-Anon. "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions" The author shares that anonymity lets us leave WHAT we are at the door, and get to know WHO we are. We can leave the surnames, labels, and expectations we have bee...
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Skorpi
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8
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814
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Married a recovering alcholic who recently fell off the wagon after 18 years sobriety
(Preview)
I have just joined and want to first say how comforting this group is. Thank you all. I married my husband in 2009 after being a single mom for 18 years. He had two children from a previous marriage (which broke up because of his drinking) and his 13-year old son lived with him. He was very upfront about...
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Nancym
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7
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980
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A Share...
(Preview)
In the day- I went to a neighbouring town with a group of AA's. They dropped my off at the home of a wife- when they went to the meeting. W. told me that she did not want to go to Alanon. She said it would open up a can of worms for her. After all this time hubby is still in AA- and she is as right as rain. I was the op...
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DavidG
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8
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923
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On behalf of my kids...
(Preview)
Hi! This message board was very helpful to me when I left my marriage almost 4 years ago. My ex is an active alcoholic. I mistakenly thought things would get better for my children and me once I finally moved out and took the youngest with me. The two older ones were already living on their own. Things did g...
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GracieP
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6
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555
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1/19/21 ODAT – Just For Today…
(Preview)
Today's Reminder: "Just for today I will live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime.""I will slow my pace. If I am under pressure and setting myself deadlines and worrying about tomo...
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Enigmatic
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6
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256
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Back-yard stuff...
(Preview)
I have chooks in the back yard. Hens- that is... The grandkids had chooks first. I always wanted them.Their dad said they had to go- and i took them over. I still have one aging non-laying bantam as a result of this. But three layers, as well... We are lucky. one daughter in the next town. Oldest daugh...
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DavidG
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10
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536
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C2C, 1/18
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, 1/18, talks about why we need to focus on ourselves. The reminder says: Is the help I offer truly loving or do I have other motives? Am I trying to change another person or get them to do what I want? Talking it over with my sponsor can offer perspective. My best hope for helping...
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Lyne
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5
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631
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Hope for Today Jan 17
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays page focuses on the concept of letting go. The writer compares his/her own struggle with opening up to the flowers in a bouquet- some of the buds remained closed, others were open with bloom on display. The writer notes that he/she often used restraint out of fear that ot...
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yanksfan51
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5
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654
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Taking Out The Trash
(Preview)
This morning I opened up my online Journal that I've been writing in since probably 2010 or 2011. On the side is a list of all the entry titles and I was sad and surprised to see just how many are about AH and all of our problems and fights. I was even sadder to realize how many years this has been going on and no...
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SunnyFrogs
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6
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363
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Recovering addict boyfriend pushing me away
(Preview)
Hi my name is Jaylie. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years in January 5th. We met as juniors in high school. and started dating almost a full year later mid senior year. Since then it has been a roller coaster of emotions. we had a really good relationship for the first 4 months. He smoked weed I hated it...
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Jayliejewell
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3
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1774
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Self care redux
(Preview)
I have spent the last few days doing self care then setting up systems where I can continue that self care However I note that many of my friends like me have neglected big portions of self care One of my friends for example went to Las Vegas for New Years. Quite apart from the fact that no one is supposed to...
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Maresie888
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9
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1478
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COURAGE TO CHANGE - SATURDAY
(Preview)
Today's reading speaks of learning to "Think." The author speaks of before Al-Anon, they would speak whatever entered their mind. Angry accusations were met with their own angry accusations... an urge to betray a confidence, to gossip were unstopped. Now they stop and "Think." Therefore, they ma...
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PosiesandPuppies
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8
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271
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Denying ourselves
(Preview)
Currently my expenses are more than my income. I.have had an unexpected medical expense that is pretty big. Staging it out is really scary. As a child most of my needs were not met. As an adult I.have been around people who are notoriously selfish. I learned to.ignore and squash my needs around them ...
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Maresie888
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5
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921
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Courage to Change - January 15 - Worry
(Preview)
Today's reading describes a day in the life of someone worried about a crisis happening to an alcoholic -- unable to concentrate at work, projecting horrible outcomes, dreading what the future may bring. The slogan One Day at a Time helps prevent leaping into the future. Worrying does not protect us...
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Freetime
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6
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403
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January 14, 2021 – ODAT – Honesty With Ourselves
(Preview)
Todays ODAT reading suggests that if we know or sense that someone is resentful or dislikes us that we can seek to understand why. It is then, when we are honestly seeking those answers that we can learn, not only about ourselves but to have an opportunity to makeamends if necessary. It is suggested th...
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Debb
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8
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360
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