The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
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level.
I am back now, but as fluffy. I have family members that may run across this site and know my other name. This was not a problem before. They will not notice if they see the name fluffy. I changed my name so they don't run across my posts that are from my heart and very open. If you want to know my former name you can pirvate me here online. My daughter does let me talk about her so her life can help others. I am also using this name in the room since they can show up there too. Someone said my name in room tonight and I did feel it broke my anonymity so everyone please be respectful of that fact not only for me but for everyone. If I am not chatting, well I am just not chatting. It takes awhile for some of us to feel welcomed again at a chatroom after being gone.
My daughter, now 22, is doing extremely well. She is in a recovery house apartment setting with her own apartment. They have 24 hour staff and very strict rules. This placement for her happend after he ex-boyfriend strangled her and beat her so badly per one of my last posts. He is the one she also had the miscarriage from. She is seeing different counselors and back in college in autobody. She is very happy in that area even though she has 2 years of college in spanish and sign language. She just got her 6 month coin, chairs meetings and is a group rep. I am so very proud of her. I do not ask her about her sobriety as that is her program and her life. I sure have come a long way since alanon in how my relationship is with her.
My husband is an adult child of an alcoholic. We are getting along better but still have major challenges. The years with a daughter that is a drug addict and alcoholic changed both of us and not in good ways. Alot of you here know what I mean.
My parents are still a main concern for me. My mom's alzheimers is getting worse all the time and my dad recently found out he needs a heart transplant but is too old. They will be trying a new procedure on him next week to help with the function of his heart. I will probably go be with them during that time. My mom's alzheimers is so very VERY hard on me. I do well at their house 2 hours away, but crash and burn when I get home due to my own health issues.
My own health is not good. That is what has brought me back here for now. I need to focus on me now and my recovery. If not, I may not be around to help my parents. I recently had 2 sleep studies and found out I have sleep apnea too. In 3 hours I get 5 minutes of sleep! No wonder I have been so tired all the time. I will soon get a machine to see if that will help me. Then it will be easier for me to work on my recovery more too.
My one brother still will not respond or talk to us. It has been 5 years now and it is breaking my mom's heart. My other brother visited this summer and pretty much distanced himself to my parents and myself. He was here for a family reunion. I don't know if it was hard to see mom with alzheimers but his wife told me he still deals with past anger issues. AT 50 something I would hope he would just get over it, but that is his issue. It does however make me the sole caretaker of my parents.
I look forward to the unconditional support and ESH I have always gotten here. If I am not replying it is due to my exhaustion from the apnea and I hope I can start replying when that gets better. It is nice to see you all! fluffy :) xoxoxoxo
Hello Fluffy it is so good to hear from you again. You should she so proud of your daughter, hasn't she done well? All that heartache and now finally she has come up for air and smelling the roses again. Do you still have the dog that helped her get through all the tough times? Fill me in on everything when you get a chance and it is wonderful to have you back. ((()) Luv Leo xx
I've thought about you often! So glad you are back. As I was reading your post, I was wondering how your parents were doing. I understand that road you are traveling all to well. It is so emotionally draining that it is physically exhausting, it's also so difficult to deal with the role reversal. Please, take time for yourself, get your rest (as best you can) and eat right. It is so much harder to take care of those things that must be taken care of in this kind of a situation if you are exhausted, and it's so hard to recoup from that exhaustion.
It is wonderful that your daughter is moving in a good direction. Isn't it amazing? Sometimes it appears that things will never turn around and then they do. ( without any help from us at all LOL)
It really is good to see you posting again. I'll keep you in my prayers.
Thanks so much for the warm welcomes :) Yes it is so exhausting and that is one reason I came back here. To finally work on me as alanon points out is so important. I see there are still wonderful people here to give support and love! I still have my daughter's dog, the medium sized black mixed lab. He has brought love and joy to my life and gives me a reason to wake up in the mornings---or he wakes me up lol. He will sleep by me for up to 12 hours and not leave my side. I never realized how loyal dogs were. He has a limp as one leg still stays straight and rigid. I sure can run though when he gets the chance and in deep snow too LOL. He got away at my parent's house and boy did he run run run. Luckily he came back after lots of cheerful yelling from mom and me for about a half hour LOL. He loves when my daughter comes to see him and knows that is his mommy. He gets along great with the cats now and the younger cat and he finally know how to play nice. My daughter hopes to find a rental house with a yard and fence when she is done with the rehab place so he can live with her. He is a miracle just to be so healthy and happy as he is! When I got him back after the ex-boyfriend abused my daughter, it was obvious the dog had also been abused. He is so secure now but had abandonment issues and follows me like my own shadow. It has taken awhile to get him as happy as he is.
Thanks again for the warm welcome back and your replies. fluffy :)
Thanks for the update on your daughter's dog too! I was thinking of asking about him, wasn't sure if it was a painful subject or not though. I'm so happy he is doing well afte rthe accident and bringing you all such joy! They are amazing.
He has been a blessing in my life! I believe HP brought him to us and it is my privelage to do whatever I can to help him heal and be happy. I joined a dog site too so I could learn all about dogs. I was new at this dog ownership stuff before. ARF ARF, fluffy xoxoxoxo
So good to see you again with your new nick. I have missed you and wondered about you so many times. It's so good to know how you are and that you are back. Thank you so much for the update and welcome back!
It is so great to see you again whatever your name. I have truly missed you. I almost caught you in chat the other night. By the time I saw you it was too late and you had gone. I am glad that things are going better for you in many areas. Will be looking for you in chat. Will be great to catch up.
Thank you lexie, beth and lebe for your kind replies. I use to put all my energy into this site but I can not longer do that. Please feel free to send me private messages here as I am gone alot at my parents house and can read them there. Oh lebe, I remember when you were in the room. I think I just signed out and it hit me that I just saw your name. I wasn't able to come back on. (((((lebe))))) I sure have missed alot of you! fluffy :)
