The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have a complaint that I have nothing to complain about. No drama to speak of going in my life. I guess I could turn a few things into drama if I give it the old college try. Why would I want to though?
I am 29. For 27 of those years, I was a complainer. Anything and everything I could think of....life was awful for poor Ziggy. Complaining and chaos kind of use to go hand in hand. Something has changed. I don't have either going on. I still have moments. They don't last for any period of time the way the use to.
If someone would have told me, "Hey go to Al-anon, they will take the Witchy Drama Queen Right Out of YOU!" Them would have been fightin' words for one. lol Growing up, my mothers would always tell me, "you think too negative". I didn't know how to this positive though.
In this program, I have learned to slow my thinking down. The last thing I should be doing is jumping to any conclusion. I am learning, to say in my brain, "I am not ready to be suspicious yet" until I have clear evidence. One of the guys who co-sponsored me, used to chant to me, "Screw guilt! Let go of old ideas!" It sounded like a broken record. Until one day, I came on a situation....and thought, this is going to turn out very, very bad......it always has. Then, I thought....how do I know that. Can I predict that 100%. Or maybe this could be the time that it could turn out the way we hope it to turn out for the first time out of a 1000.
Slowly, I think my brain was a little reprogramed. I am very gratful for that. I have God in my life and the street runs both ways....not just one. Today, I have nothing to complain about. Today, I am gratful that I am able to see that.
The love in my heart for everyone was once conditional. Not today. Today, I can find a quality in each person on the street, that I can love and I can build that love on that one quality if nothing else. I feel that is what my God wants of me.
Tomorrow may be different. I could be angry, resentful, a little ball of hate, and back to my old drama queen ways. That person isn't dead.....but she is in a coma and could wake up at anytime. I have to remember that.
This is just one of the many things I have gotten from this program. Not everyone is going to get the same thing. That is for certain.
Hope all have a great day. If I find a gripe...maybe I will come tell you guys about it. lol
You crack me up! But it's a great lesson. My biggest complaint is the lack of snow. Where did it go? I'm a New Englander and I snow shoe. We had some flurries, but it looked more like dandruff! Well it's my day off. I could do some laundry, but sober hubby already did that. I could take down my tree, but it's too pretty. So yes, life is good. Gotta count your blessings while we have them. Have a wonderful day!
Love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
__________________
It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
Not too long after I posted, I was ready to take the kids to school. Started the van to warm it up....and sounded like the motor was going to blow up. I just put a heater core (coil?) in it last week (Ziggy likes warm toes) as well as new brakes (Ziggy makes frequent stops for squirrels). No big deal. I have no doubt that can be fixed...there is always a solution.
Went to start my BF truck and take them to school in that......battery dead. Battery must be taking a little nappie-poo. No big deal, that is certainly fixable. Called a friend from the program to take kids to school. He took them. Called another friend to see what he thought....out of oil? something in the fan area? Valve you think? He hooked a battery charger up to the truck. Told me about noon I could take it down to get new battery. Then, told me about a good mechanic.
So, called that mechanic and he told me to bring it in about 1:15 today. Drive it easy over.
Is my program working? You bet! I have yet to say one cuss word. I know that things will work out and there will be a solution. No big deal. It really is no big deal. I just have to put one foot in front of the other and take care of business. In the meantime.....I am now opened up to get other things done around the house that have been put off for so long.
I start back to school next Wednesday and would like to see the house in pretty good shape so I will have less to do when my classes start getting a little tough. If that doesn't happen with the house...that will be okay too.
I am someone who used to tantrum as much as the A. I also used to rage all the time. I've stopped a lot of that. I can still have my resentments! I also stopped swearing.
Thanks for reminding me things change. Sometimes I feel as you know I am in molasses the truth is one year of al anon has made a tremendous difference!
