The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Can anyone give suggestions on how to wake up with out a 18 and 22 year old on Christmas. I have stayed busy this season. But do not know about Christmas Morning.
There is no magic answer and nothing that makes the pain less. I've been where you are and continue to get through it every Christmas. It never goes away, we just learn to live with it as time passes. It really does get better. I could say all the standard lines that people say "they are in HP's arms"..but I know when your pain is so great and it is your arms that are empty, words can be meaningless.
I'm very sorry,
Christy
__________________
If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
I have not had the experiences you are. My heart goes out to you. I am soooooooo sooooooo sorry. This is what I have learned from others who were alone on the holidays though and thought I'd share it with you.
In my area, there are 24 hour Alanonathons for Christmas and New Years. I had a friend go last year and he said it was wonderful.
We have a Children's Hospital in our state and they allow visitors, some even dressed as Santa who want to volunteer their time.
Any soup kitchen or homeless shelter could use some help preparing a hot meal for the homeless on Christmas Day.
Attending any denominational service with Christmas music might be nice (though I know for me no matter whether I am alone or with others, I ball my eyes out with all of the Christmas music. It just does something to me. A cathartic cry.
And finally, perhaps just staying at home if it is warm and comfy, renting as many funny movies as you can -- I love Liar, Liar with Jim Carrey for instance.
Let us know how you are doing and how you made out. Keep coming.
yours in recovery, Maria
__________________
If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
I would like to do some volunteer work but I do not drive. I have a presentation in 2 weeks . I probably will try to work all day. I have nephew that is going to need me. Dad is bedfast. mom can not move from her grief. I need to be there for my 2 brothers and sister-in law plus all of their friends.
I know to take care of me is most important or I can not help the others.
wow am so sorry for your loss . Perhaps u can try doing the oposite to what u have always done . Throw tradition aside and treat yourselves to breakfast out , souround yourself with friends and loved ones cry when u need to in general just look after yourself . I will be thinking of you to morrow . And I sure wish there was something really clever to say to solve this problem but there isn't . remember and review the good times u had with your loved ones / Momories are all we have really . Walk thru it and tho it sounds really trite
I have no words to comfort you. All I can do if offer my sympathies and keep you and your family in prayers. Know that they are at peace and not hurting anymore. Much love and blessings to you at this time and always.
Karilynn
__________________
It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
We surived Christmas. We had a new baby borned a month early. He is OK. Granny went to the ER with Kidney Problems same hospital that my 22 year old almost die last Christmas. Theboys were both prounced deas there. Alot of flashbacks. I am overeating.
Everyone us grouchy around here and my nephew is hanging around the wrong people.
